I liked where Arthur gave Ron a bitch slap for his insolence towards Harry when he was pulling his political clout.

This is one of those stories that uses a lot of cliches, but atleast the author has some kind of semblance of writing skill. There are few errors and the writing has a decent flow.

However as others stated, this started as 'Write a HP/DG story' in the authors mind and they went on there with practically no pacing to the romance between HP and DG, and frankly it's forced in. See cringe worthy "please be my girlfriend" line, which then within a day is practically "lets get married".

Practically nothing is going wrong, which is why I hate some of these fics. Susans house got fucking burnt down and everyone (including Susan) shrug it off. "Oh we're young, really fucking rich, and have a ruling majority in the wizarding ruling class, who cares. Oh yea, we've spent like 1 week (if that) training with tutors that we now have enough experience to fuck up some Death Eaters when they attack Diagon Alley, and we fuck them up enough that we're issued wannabe Auror licenses".

Auror licenses, that let them go around fucking up Death Eaters, because they're powerful enough with enough experience that their skill is recognized as being on par with trained aurors, who I presume had more than a week of training.

Lets not forget the ultra-wards that they bought which the author has made sure to stress are nigh unbreakable, so they can have all the fun they want in one of their 2 extravagant manor houses. I don't even know why he has gone to the effort to talk up the wards. Is it so when Voldemort comes a-knocking and tears them down like tissue paper he gets a power hype?

I got on a bit of a rant there...

After all that, it's really hard to find a (new) HP/DG story that is decent, while this one has it's flaws, it'll do. It's definitively about a trillion times better than Secrets of the Chamber, which is one of the other active HP/DG stories going, if you could call it that...

My HP/DG bias makes me grin and bear all the crappy stuff and just enjoy the decent parts. It helps that there are some amusing lines (generally making fun of Ron), 3.5/5

 

I could take the rushed romance, I could even take extreme fluff (like having your body hugged by warm wet pink fluffy towel), but does everyone have to cry all the time? Seriously, when Harry's not being cuddly-wuddly with Daphne, he's crying his eyes out over being abused and what-not. God damn it! Stop making Harry such a pussy! GOD...

The story can best be described as a poorly executed Disney epic like 'Beauty and the Beast', 'Aladdin' and et cetera, because of the gag-worthy interpretation of true love (Bella and the 'Beast' fell in love in just two days).

2/5 because the author has good grammar and spelling. He can probably do better than this and I sincerely hope he do.

 

Lemme find the right spot...

A little further down there's this:

These two are just a few of the times Harry or someone else cries. I think Daphne cried a few times on behalf of Harry as well...

 

Breaking my own rules against posting unless I'm actually adding to the discussion, but the irony there was too much for me to ignore. Made me chuckle...

 

Heh, I foolishly over thought whether or not it was "do" or "does". I failed...

I call in my "I'm-not-from-an-English-speaking-country-get-away-free-card" as to save myself from embarrassment. That's right, it's a REAL card!

 

I did not enjoyh it at all, the pussy Harry genre just isn't for me..

2/5 for decent writing.

 

Has anyone actually read a really-really good Harry-Daphne story? I would so love to see this come through, but it never happens. Probably the one that starts with the funeral scene -can't remember the title though - was almost there.
This story is a huge disappointment anyway. Deadly boring cliches, rushed, unbelievable romance and much more. waste of bits.
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Perhaps the story you're thinking of is the one Jeconais wrote? I never read it, but it does start with a funeral, Harry's funeral, I believe.

 

That would be this.

Perfect Situations is the best Harry/Daphne fic I've read. I'm almost certain there was another decent one (but nowhere near as good as PS). Can't recall the name, though.

EDIT: Ninja'd. That's what I get for opening all new posts in tabs as soon as I open the main page. >_>

EDIT2: V Completely forgot about Perspicasity's fic. It's not really H/D romance though, which is probably why I forgot about it.

 

I think that the best fic that used Daphne was Perspicasity's The Game is Afoot. It's not specifically Harry/Daphne (the summary says it's a "Harry/Ginny/Daphne anti-romance"), but it's one of the few stories out there that doesn't rape the characters and make Daphne sue-ish or annoying or one of the slew of other things that kill her rather ambiguous character<insert annoyance="">.
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Why must these tiresome shitty writers make Harry continuously cry? Harry Potter should be a walking pillar of magnificent masculinity. Cut him and he does not cry. He might bleed liquid awesome though.

Anyway, considering that the numerous failings present in this fic have already been outlined quite sufficiently by everyone, I have only one question to pose:

Why is this still here?

 

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=13452

The paragon of Harry-ness; Captain Awesome! He would bleed liquid awesome...if you could make him bleed.