They're all set within the same universe/timeline.

 

A sequel? Why? We all know what happens. Shogun is a very thinly veiled Westernised re-telling of Japanese history, with John Blackthorne playing the part of the historical Will Adams, Torunaga as Tokugawa Ieyasu, Ichido as Ichida...even Buntaro and Mariko are literary doppelgangers of historical figures.

For anyone who's interested, I highly recommend Shogun, as it, along with King Rat and Tai-Pei, is a member of the better part of the Asian saga. Gai-Jin is mediocre at best, to say nothing of Whirlwind, which I found to be interminable.

As for what happens, The Battle of Sekigahara occurs, Ichida loses after a betrayal during the battle by a few of his allies, and Ieyasu consolidates his hold on Japan, closing it off for nearly three hundred years, giving rise to the Tokugawa Shogunate dynasty before the the Meiji revolution occurs, after which the Dutch are among the first foreigners to touch Japanese soil in almost three centuries.

*grins* I won't claim to be anything but an amateur regarding Japanese history, as my interest lies solely in late 19th- to 20th-century Russia (as I'm half Russian by birth, I felt it apt), but I know a little something something.

Bloodreaver Alpha OUT.

 

I agree on Gai-jin, easily my least favorite of the ones I've read. I liked Noble House a lot also, in addition to the three you listed.

 

I know, but I'd still like to see the aftermath. Or at least get a copy of the book since mine was a library one.

 

I just started reading this...

Itachi is really bizarre in this (and not in a good way, I think). It's hard to get into him.

Pray? Honor? Kisame? Sucker punch?

Even if Itachi is slowly becoming a "normal" person, I wouldn't expect him to pray or respect Kisame. I'd expect him to be in conflict with himself, confused and ineqloquent. But that's just me, I guess. There's no such thing as a sucker punch in the ninja world, and if Itachi is to believe that his dishonorable attack is indeed dishonorable, it will be after being stripped of his assassinhood. It grates me Itachi is acting like this since it seems incongruent to even an adjusted OOC Itachi.

It bugs me when authors have to tell us a character is lying. We either know it because it's obvious or we don't... because we shouldn't, not yet. I don't like "uzumaki brat" here since it feels like the author is talking about Naruto and it's not Itachi actually thinking of him (Naruto's already been mentioned twice, once from Kisame and once from Itachi... which is far too many times I think, do they really think about one of their targets like that?).

I don't know. This seems odd. I mean, ninja should be following some sort of Buddhist or Daoist philosophy, which would say 'kill by convenience' (nip in th e bud), but I don't think it would say, "Kill all the time to solve all problems." Perhaps some rogue ninja act this way, but I wouldn't expect all ninja to behave like common brutes who kill to solve their problems.

I also disagree here. I believe all weapons originally, save perhaps the sword, have had some other function prior to their use as a weapon and were invented for that use before becoming a weapon. See: bows, gun powder, hammers, knives, nun-chuck, etc. It's pretty interesting when you think about it.

Of course I'm nitpicking, and these little gripes are only slightly ruining your story for me, it's still enjoyable, I especially like the idea of Iruka being Anko's teammate. I'll keep reading... though I don't know if I can 'rate' this yet.

 

Honor? I said NOTHING about honor.

I was originally going to reply to each one of your issues in turn, but looking over them, I came to the realisation that you're the type of person who wouldn't be satisfied by anything I said.

I wouldn't normally be offended by criticisms, as they tend to help a hell of a lot more than acclimation, but I feel that you have missed the forest for the trees, as it were. Yes, the initial chapters are a little immature as compared to the rest of the story, but I think the fundamental issue here is that your opinions on Itachi's character and your dogmatic adherence to canon run on an absolute tangent to my own.

That's fine, really. Everyone and their dog, as the saying goes, but don't complain to me because the story isn't what you expected. If you have issues with my writing style or if you've found incongruities within the text itself, by all means point them out. That'll just help me write better.

But as this is fanfiction, you should be prepared for everything from time-traveling to singing to Sasuke (defying all physiological and natural laws) impregnating Naruto.

(On a superficially related note, I pray for death to all yaoi fangirls by way of yeast infections that become self-aware and claw their way free a la Aliens)

Yes, Itachi's Out-of-Character. But by the same token, so is every other incarnation of every other character of every other fanfiction of every other subject if it is outside of canon! That's what fanfiction IS! It's the abandonment of a canonical tenet in order to achieve DIFFERENT RESULTS. Sometimes this is a small change - a single word, or an extra second's worth of thought. Other times, it can be a huge departure from the so-called 'norm'...even gender and sexuality are not sacred.

I haven't exactly gone 'elephant in the room' sort of drastic...it's more like 'holy hell there's a gazelle stapled to my ceiling'. It requires a certain suspension of disbelief, but it's possible, under certain circumstances.

Of course, if you don't like it, you don't like it. Makes no difference to me, really, but unless you have some real issues to bring up, please don't bother me with trivialities.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

Definition of 'weapon':Weapon (noun) 1a thing designed or used for inflicting bodily harm or physical damage. 2 a means of gaining an advantage or defending oneself.
-DERIVATIVES weaponry > noun
-ORIGIN Old English
Bows - Used to hunt and KILL game. WEAPON.
Gun Powder - Created by Chinese for their rockets...which were WEAPONS.
Hammers - Descended from, and inheriting the original purposes of, a club. WEAPON.
Knives - Immediate precursor to spears, used in hunting as a WEAPON.
Nun-chaku - Used as a (supposedly) non-lethal way of subduction. Still a WEAPON.

And let's expand that. You say 'ALL' weapons, hmm? Let me explain something to you - there are entire DIVISIONS of government that do nothing but research NEW AND FASCINATING WAYS TO KILL PEOPLE. Weapons R & D.

Missiles - invented to kill people. NO OTHER PURPOSE. So yes, there are weapons designed to JUST BE WEAPONS.

Yes, it is 'pretty interesting'...if by 'it' you mean your historical short-sightedness.

WOW. I'm sorry, but that's really not something to be proud of.

Bloodreaver Alpha OUT with THE WIN.

 

No... but it was implied. Itachi felt guilty for surprising Kisame with an attack, that perhaps he should have challenged him to a fair fight. Unless I misunderstood his meaning?

True and not true... I was merely pointing out my gripes. You can in-turn explain them, or you can ignore me. That's what I expect from an author... I don't really care which way or the other. Don't misunderstand.

Good...

Dogmatic? No, not really. I could accept a clown!Itachi if the tone of the story were right. The tone of your story was serious, so I was expecting a realistic departure from canon!Itachi to your!Itachi.

I didn't really miss any forest, I was nipicking, like I acknowledged. I know there are more important things. I was making observations. If you can't inspect the trees, how can you know you're in a forest?

I should be able to complain if the tone makes me expect something, and I get something else. Maybe complain the wrong word. I'm not really complaining, I'm trying to show my reaction to your story, so you can guage it and say, "That's what I intended for a reader to get out of it." Or "Hmm maybe I should change the wording?" That's intent anyway, if I've done something else I guess I should apologize.

Don't lecture me on that please, I'm on this forum am I not? I've experienced what you're talking about and I certainly don't expect a professionally edited or written masterpiece. It's all fun, but the fun is improved when the writing is made better. I wouldn't even bother talking to an author who wrote a terrible story (unless I pitied them). Obviously, I can see the potential in your skill and want to see if I can improve it. Maybe I'm being too arrogant.

The difference is: how do you achieve this? I mean yeah you could write whatever you want. Itachi can be an emo punk with a vagina. But you have to start from somewhere. How you decide to take canon and mold it into your own story is usually what makes fanfiction.

Bow... hunt animals. Yes kill, but not humans. Used for survival. Not a tool of murder.
Hammers were made for farming, building, etc.
Knives were made for cutting up skin and meat of animals.
Nun-chaku were farming tools originally. I believe they became popular weapons when other traditional weapons were taken away from villages and they had to use what they had available.
Gun powder were used for fireworks? I don't think the Chinese tried to use explosives as weapons initially. Dynamite was used for mining. I don't know how the Chinese could have used rockets as weapons before the year 1000.

Think if monkies and chimps. They use tools to help them survive. This is likely how humans first used these items. Not to kill their own kind.

As I understand, most modern-day weapons began as tools to farm, construct, and survive. The sword and perhaps a few others might be the only exceptions.

 

Only one thing to say regarding this argument:
It doesn't matter what the weapon was designed to kill, the bow doesn't fit into your argument at all.
Otherwise, there are a significant number of weapons that were originally designed for other purposes.

In regards to the story, I was greatly interested for the half hour it took me to read, and have added it to my alert list.
Assuming an AU baseline for the story, you have been very reasonably consistent to your characters.

 

a number of weapons were designed as weapons, a number of tools were used as weapons if the need applied.
Spears, halberds, swords, crossbows, cannons, catapults, guns, bows etc. are all weapons first and foremost. i could probably write a similar list of tools which frequently were used as weapons but frankly the distinction is easy enough to see.

 

I read this story and while the Naruto parts are awesome, and some of the Itachi parts, I got sick of a lot of it. Who gives a shit about Iruka? Also, Waves arrogance in this is pretty unbelievable. Harbouring known Missing Nins and then throwing it into everybody's face? The Elemental Countries should team up and cunt-punt the little bitch and put it back in its place.

 

Aye. However the author justifies it, I just don't see any reaction from Konoha and Tsunade to that mess aside from 'Okay, you want to act tough? Now we're going to invade your little shithole and burn it to the ground. Next time don't talk back to your betters.' Might makes right in the ninja world and Wave Country doesn't have much. Preferably do it in the middle of mediation, and then have Tsunade order that bitchy little magistrate to execution rather than even attempting to bargain with her.

 

*grins*

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4061318/31/Diary_of_a_Madman_Memoirs_of_a_Nukenin

 

And that is how you deal with upstart civilians.

However, I'm now left wondering who Akatsuki will send against the Jinchuuriki. Gut instinct is telling me it's gonna be Hidan and Kakuzu (since I can't remember if they're out and about yet), but I'm hoping for it to be Kisame and Tobi.

 

I loved that. Couldn't stop myself from re-reading it again and again.:awesome

 

I rather like this story at the start, before super!Iruka entered...
But this latest chapter somewhat redeems it. Good smack-down, that.