Title: Dormant Life: Philosopher's Stone
Author: Mrs. Sniffy
Rating: T
Genre: Family/Adventure
DLP category: The Alternates (although there is a minor theme of time travel)
Pairing: unknown as of now, although there is Sirius/OC
Status: Work in progress
Summary: At King's Cross Harry Potter made a choice, but he didn't calculate into his plan that Fate will have something to say about it. Robbed off his former memories he is robbed of his parentage and grows up happily as the only son of Sirius Black but then...
Link:http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5791156/1/Dormant_Life_Philosophers_Stone

7 Chapters, About 70,000 words so far..

This fiction was written by an author who's native language is Polish, so please excuse some of her minor writing errors.

In this fiction, when Harry is in Kings Cross with Dumbledore he chooses to go back in time. He won't be raised by the Potters though, and instead he will have flashbacks to his former life. This is a fiction that does have twin potters, although it is not your typical cliché wrong boy who lived. Sirius and Severus Snape will end up becoming friends, although Snape is most definitely not redeemed from any of his many faults in life. None of the characters are perfect in any way, but Sirius is married to a woman named Mirzam. In the constellation Canis Major, the star Sirius is located next to the star Mirzam (otherwise known as Murzim). I suspect that this was the author's inspiration for choosing the name. It is overall a good read, but some parts do get rather boring and have to be skimmed through.

I give it a 4/5 because its one of the few fictions involving twin Potters that isn't a major cliché or Harry is raised by a mysterious guardian that ends up being a Mary-Sue.

 

Are you the author?

 

No I am not the author. I'm just repeating her disclaimer about her english language abilities. The reason that I know about the naming thing is because I have studied astronomy.

 

...

I think he asked mainly because you seem quite privy to what is going to happen.

Anyways... Sirius and Snape... friends?!?

And I dunnno if it's the early hour I was awaken, or the remaining alcohol in my blood, but my divination skills seem to have been boosted, because after reading this:

"Author: Mrs. Sniffy"

somehow this:

Genre: Family/Adventure

and... this:

Pairing: ... Sirius/OC

... did not come as a surprise at all...

Still, I'll give it a try and comment and rate when I've read actually something of it.

 

She has too many Harry/Snape stories in her favorites for me to trust reading this story without proper convincing first.

 

About Snape and Sirius

The reason that I can predict so much about this story is because this author uses the same OC, but with different levels of morbidness in her early life, in most of the fictions she writes. Usually her fictions follow a pattern of someone coming back from the dead, most likely a random Black family member, they find all the horcruxes, Snape has a backstory, then they tell some Black family history. (Dumbledore usually gets manipulative around the time that the Blacks adopt a child, which happens in most of her stories, such as Winds of Change, Curiosity Killed the Cat, and A Year to Remember: Philosopher's Stone. Although in this story Dumbledore hasn't been overly manipulating, yet...)

I know that some people can't fathom Sirius Black ever being remotely cordial to Severus Snape, but in this story Snape saves Sirius' son's life with some potion he made. This causes him and Sirius to become sort of allies. By the way, the OC isn't Snape's sister or anything disgusting like that, Sirius' wife is a muggleborn. I think personally that Sirius could have potentially been a much less nasty character in OOTP if he hadn't spent thirteen years in Azkaban while he was innocent. In this story, he doesn't go to Azkaban, has a wife and two kids. This alone is a reason for a major character change.

She's written one story where Snape is actually Orion Black's son, and him and Sirius are long lost brothers. That story, The Blacks I: WInds of Change, is a whole crap load of clichés, with a bunch of people who come back from the dead, manipulative Dumbledore, and weirdly enough, Walburga Black welcomes him and his wife into the big happy Black family. It also has a reason for Mrs. Weasley's madness that is quite plausible. She also usually ships Harry/Hermione (ew), but in this fiction in one of her author's notes she sort of hinted that Harry and Hermione won't get together, thankfully. Daphne Greengrass also makes an appearance, though I know that many people on this site hate the way in which she is usually cast in fanfictions. In this one, I think that she and Harry will end up just being friends.
This author does cast Snape in many of her stories, but he isn't always a good character. I guarantee you that Snape and Sirius become friends for a reason.
In one of her other fictions, Harry was a victim of a baby switching at the hospital and he was really Sirius and his girlfriend's baby.

She has said in author's notes that this is a fiction in response to the "wrong-boy-who-lived, wrong twin" genre, but I assure you that this is not a cliché .

 

This inspires absolutely no confidence, but I'm gonna reserve judgment until I've actually read the fic.


EDIT: I nearly stopped when Dumbledore contemplated his sorrows on not being able to get pregnant, but I made it to the end of the first chapter. It was painful. The OC's name is Mirzam Verascez (and she's a werewolf), the character interaction is forced in the 'I'm trying to be funny/angsty/serious but I'm not' sort of way, and the supposed lack of cliches is an outright lie. The grammar can be forgiven because of the language issue, but there's no excuse for everything else. I stopped reading at chapter one, but unless it becomes miraculously interesting after that I'm giving it a solid 1/5.

 

I had a similar issue of being entirely unable to make it through the first chapter, not too many technical issues, but the plot is just so... ugh. Completely unpleasant. A 1/5 from me.

 

It's good that she's clarifying that, I guess... The writing is only ok at best, and as the OP said, there are several errors, but she's not writing in her native language, so fair enough. The Black family immunity to all kinds of truth serums made me cringe. And I just couldn't force myself to get through the first chapter. Not good.

 

I only read the first chapter - skimmed it, really - but it's decent enough. Almost worthy of a three, barring how the rest of it is.

I'm being nice, of course. Some of the characters, in certain situations, don't read like real people, or even semi real people.

1/5 is to harsh. Maybe a 1.97/5.

 

I read it. It's a decent story but kinda throws me for a loop tho when the author has changed up the world so much but not actually explain why? The whole Dumbledore and pregnant thing I guess was just stemming from how JKR said he was gay after DH. For Harry/??? it looks to me like it will be H/Hr in the same light as Sirius/OC in the story got together. Snape is nothing but a cool uncle figure to Harry.

Overall I give it a 3/5.

 

Honestly couldn't think of a proper review after I read that. Might be my own personal opinion, but it's quite bad.

 

Seriously...stop with the stupid pictures. Pretty sure you can adequately state your opinion in words without resorting to making this into a picture collage.

That being said, story is bad. no way around it. Too many things are wrong with it for my liking especially the whole Dumbledore thing. Sirius's wife being a werewolf is a little to convenient. And Sirius being nice to Snape is to weird for me, even if he didn't get send to azakaban. Snape and Sirius will always be miserable bastards to each other and in general no way around that for me.

 

I've always thought of Dumbledore as asexual, with the exception of Grindelwald; who he had a deep respect and admiration for.

 

I actually once read a fic that explained Dumbledore's infatuation with Grindelwald...its because Grindelwald looks exactly like his sister Ariana. But, Grindelwald was right in the head ( if not a bit too obsessed with the dark arts) and Ariana was an insane squib at that point.

 

So you're saying that if she weren't an insane squib, Dumbledore would have wanted to bone his sister? Um...

Also, the notion that Dumbledore was in love with Grindelwald because of the resemblance to his sister is just stupid.

 

Not sure what to say about Albus wanting to bone his sister, but I think it's more that Albus found someone who was an equal of sorts to him in magical power and brilliance. He disregarded the "dark" elements of Grindelwald's psyche in favor of his better ones.

 

^^That. Plus, where on earth did the books say Grindelwald looks like Ariana? The Grindelwald ~> Ariana thing is just some fanon ass-pull. Granted, I haven't read DH in a while, but this seems to be the sort of thing one would remember.

 

I disagree. If he loved his sister's appearance, but was hesitant to pursue her due to reasons being she's a squib, could not get over the societal stigma of incest, she was not his equal in intelligence, or he was gay. Then he sees Grindelwald and is relieved. Cue sappy romance with darker undertones of incestuous desire, and being torn between convenient love of friend and familial/true love of sister. Would be a pretty damn good read if done properly, I think.

As to the fic...

Cringe is the right word I'm looking for. As to a phrase that would fit it....It left a bad taste in my mouth.

DLP translation of the above....2/5(Dreadful).

 

Umm. No. I'm sorry, that's just odd. Because if he's in love with his sister's appearance, it seems more unlikely that he would be gay. While it might make an interesting fic, in discussing canon Dumbledore or anything adhering somewhat closely to it, it really doesn't stack up.