Title: Harry Potter and the Sage's Stone
Author: Lovepoint33
Rating: T
Genre: Western/Adventure (apparently)
DLP Category: The Alternates (Dresden-verse crossover)
Pairing: None yet, and no hints.
Status: Work in Progress
Summary: After ending a plot to initiate the Darkhallow over London, Ebenezar McCoy takes a day off. The Day: October the 31st. At sunset, he stops in a village. Godric's Hollow. Events flow, people die, and everything changes. Thus does the legend begin.
Link: Again

So far, this holds potential. It's a crossover, where Harry is raised by Eb McCoy (The Blackstaff), and spends part of his childhood living alongside Dresden. The Potter- and Dresden-verse magics are (until now) incompatable, with little to no interactions between societies. On top of that, there is supposedly a third universe (a UK based magical one) also 'hidden' in here. Somewhere.

Also, its metafiction. With the Author actually interacting with the story via Author's notes once or twice, although this being still has to follow The Laws of The Universe, or fall prey to Auditor-like things.

AND they changed history through both verses. Apparently Lucius Malfoy is now Lucien, and his father is called Sedaris, not Abraxas.


I honestly don't know what to think of this. Its confusing, and strange. But I think better written than the majority of ff.net stuff. I feel though, that the author has changed a heap of things without warning, and meshing together three fandoms?

 

Read up to chapter 3. What the fuck is this shit?

 

I read the first three chapters of this fic and I'm really confused:

Why would an author who has an acceptable grasp on technical writing and tension building resort to such an utter stupidity as "meta-meta writing"?

The plot bunny is a rather good one, but the whole "meta-metafiction" ruins the story before it had any real chance of taking off. Instead of an interesting AU/crossover the reader finds himself in some mutated chat!fic that makes immersion impossible. Who wants to read about an author who inserts himself as deus-ex-machina into his own story using shitty nerdspeak?

I give this a 2/5 instead of a zero because of the interesting plot bunny as seen in the prologue.

 

What the fuck is this shit? The author sounds as an arrogant, self-centered douchebag, that tries to disguise self insert with some newspeak about some meta shit. Not worth reading. Delete it.

 

You hit the nail on the head franki.

 

Bluntly, if Stephen King can't make metafiction work, this guy fucking can't.

 

Quoted for the motherfucking truth.

 

I read the summary and I was so hopeful, then I read the reviews, and those hopes were dashed.

 

Gatdamn carrier waves... Ah, whatever. I'm here, I'm slightly annoyed, let's get this over with.

Yo! Thaumologist! What's up?

I'm Lovepoint33. Bottom of my FFNET profile if you cannot believe it.

Habeebing? Good, good. Moving on, I answer all reviews. ALL OF THEM. EVEN THE ONES THAT I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT.

So then, since I only just got here, and since it's possible, I'll address all concerns raised in a single post. Starting with the charge of self-insertion for the purpose of deus ex machina!

@NoxedSalvation

Jesus Christ, does anyone pay attention to "meta-metafiction" bit at all? You saw it, sure, but I'm seriously beginning to think I need to rewrite that bit in the prologue if nobody understands what I mean by it.

Metafiction is when the author is a character, and a self insert, and ninety ninety times out of a hundred is either a shadow protagonist or a godlike being. Meta-metafiction is when the author is a character... Just like anyone else.

Yeah "I" play a role in the story. As R.A. Transfinite's blissfully oblivious meat puppet. Not exactly what most people do when they have a character, no? Anyway, you all have my word that LOVEPOINT33 the character will never become more than she already is.

R.A. Transfinite is not a self insert or anything of the sort. If you really, really, really want to know

Spoiler

this fic is a pseudo peggy sue where the traveller's one and only power is three chances and one to create a nail, a single, small change to alter the course of history favourably. And it doesn't come without a cost every time it's used.

As for immersion breaking... The Executive Save segment was what you were talking about, right? In that case, yeah, I can see how it broke immersion. Unfortunately, it's actually pretty important, on multiple levels. For one, it helps the readers who ignore the author's note realize that the story is not a standard crossover, and that lets them stop. reading.

It prevents people from growing attached the universe and later hurling abuse for a long time because they started to care about it. Instead, they hurl abuse over the course of perhaps one review.

The other reasons are plot relevant, and I can think of a reason to share them.

@franki

I'm an arrogant self-centered douchebag? And you can tell this from five chapters of text that is not autobiographical in nature?

...

All right. If it pleases you. I've been called far worse.

@Andromalius

Which is precisely why it isn't metafiction. Yep, I need to change the explanation in the prologue A/N.

...

Yeah, I think that answers everything.

VOTE 5. :awesome

 

You're not serious.


Also, I love your name.

I hope you have a long and happy association with DLP.

 

What the fuck are you on about? Whatever the definition is, the story is still terrible.

 

Do you have legitimate mental health issues?

I genuinely think you need to go see someone. I'm serious. This isn't internet tough-guying, but nothing you just said made any coherent sense.

I hope you're okay.

 

Well, the responses to the reviews were completely accurarate. I kept the non-serious stuff outside of them.

Glad you like it!

So do I...

Can you please be more specific? Quoting the entire post and then asking a general question provides a scope that is far too broad for me to effectively answer your question.

Regarding your opinion, as long as you understand precisely what the story is, that's fine, though I'd like to know why it's terrible. Especially considering that the plot has yet to hit the main thread.

What ruined it for you, in other words?

No, I don't have mental health issues. Or at least, I don't believe I do, and nobody who knows me personally believes I do. Unless one goes to the psychologist on a lark, that's as sure as any of us can be.

So I might be completely batshit insane, but it's not very likely.

If you're talking about before the replies started and after they ended, I said hello to Thaumologist because we've met before. Everything else (Habeeb, carrier waves, VOTE 5, etc.) are old memes and obscure references. Though, if anyone gets the carrier wave bit, I'll be seriously impressed.

Within the reviews, that's because my responses to those reviews assumed prior knowledge of the story. If you've read it all the way to the third chapter, there's nothing that should be opaque to comprehension.

The one exception might be the term "meat puppet". It's a phrase for a mind controlled person that I stumbled upon... Somewhere. The best I can offer you is that wikipedia has a page on it.

Positively chipper!

Also, The Sun Dog is awesome.

 

I understood your post (sorta) but I don't understand why you bothered with meta-meta-. It doesn't add anything positive to the story. If you need those three changes made, then don't bother having the wrong choices made in the first place. If you need another character, make an OC. Inserting yourself while unselfaware isn't conducive to good writing.

 

It's an unbelievable offputting writing device and I can't think of any reason why you use it at all. I doubt you will find many readers while you "experiment" with such hamfisted methods- why would anyone want to invest time and emotions into characters who are nothing more than puppets of a puppet anyway?

:facepalm The post hoc nature of this "argument" is mind numbingly obvious. I don't want to read cheap excuses, I want to know why you feel the need to use this SHIT move you call "Executive Save" at all. It's ridiculous to waste your talent on "meta-meta fiction" when you could use it to actually entertain your readers.

 

I could not possibly care any less about this trite, self-indulgent, empty writing exercise and the author's disorganized crazyman-talk in this thread isn't helping.

So I guess it was a huge success. He wanted me to stop reading and, lo and behold,

 

Took a look at the fic.The fic has potential in the sense that the diverse magics that the author has used can be shaped into something amazing.That said its defining characteristic is also the cause of its fall.

The mere chance that the 2 magics could exist for thousands of years and no record of it crossing paths is close to nil.And the summary hints at one more society existing as well.

HP/Dresden crossover have a lot of potential just by simply existing and when done right are a delight to read.The Fic could do with a spell check at the minimum.Constantly switching POV annoy me and I have to put that much effort into just keeping my mind on the story.Lovepoint33 also seems to delight in switching POV with every new character that comes along and the trend seems likely to continue through the story.

Also all the strange comments he makes serves to annoy rather than amuse when one is trying to explore the intricacies of 2 different magics.

 

I will say this: this guy has a crazy imagination. Props for that.

 

So, you're a hipster?

 

This story is crap, rating 0/5

I have no use arguing with you, since you clearly won't accept any criticism.