Way back when I was a kid, a company called Bethesda created an SNES RPG. Its official name is "Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry", but it's commonly referred to as the Harry Potter games, named after its main protagonist. (Screenshot)

There was a book adaptation of the first two years, but they weren't really popular. That's not surprising, though. The game had about 8 possible questlines for each one of Harry's years at Hogwarts, and each book could only follow one of them. Book 1 mostly followed the Philosopher's Stone main quest and book 2 followed the Chamber of Secrets main quest. I think they also threw in some elements from other questlines, such as Draco challenging Harry to a Wizard's Duel from the Tower of Agamemnon main quest. I remember reading that bit as a kid and being so frustrated when they never found the clue that would have led them to Hogwarts' hidden treasury.

There were some rumors that a third and fourth book were scheduled to be created, but the publishing company (Scholastic) folded before any more books could be made.

Anyhow, I was poking through my attic the other day and came across several of my old Harry Potter books, and that got me thinking about the game again. So I decided to download the ROM and do a Let's Play-style game.

Then I realized that I hate anything resembling effort, so I guess I'll just let everybody talk about their memories of the game and we'll just see what happens.

 

I feel like I've just woken up in a sex dungeon while being anally raped by a Gorilla wearing bright pink headphones and an "I'm with stupid" T-shirt.

That's the level of sheer confusion this thread inspires in me.

 

What?

No really. What?

 

Huh. Not quite the responses I was hoping for, but I can work with this.

Seratin and Emiya: I'm working on a fanfiction where Harry finds himself in the RPG I've described after completing his first runthrough of books 1-7. I thought it would be fun to pretend it was a real RPG and see if I could get anybody else to play along.
That option's still on the table, BTW.

Sree: Yes, it was a faked screenshot. I just grabbed a random Crono Trigger screenshot and slapped GBA Harry over the top. No matter where I post this, there's always one guy who can tell exactly where the image is from. Good catch!

While I understand that there was some confusion, I think banning me seems to be a drastic overreaction for posting "a retarded thread".

Which also seems like needlessly confrontational language. I suppose it helps that you have both power and anonymity, so you can say whatever you want without worrying about repercussions.
Still...

 

Ugh. I've seen these kinds of threads before. Shitposting, plain and simple.

 

Red Aviary: I must admit, I'm not familiar with that phrase. In context, though, it's obviously a bad thing.

How am I shit-posting, and what should I do in the future to avoid shit-posting?


EDIT: After looking through some of the posts in the Hall of Shame, I can only conclude I'm handling this the wrong way.

You all suck dick.

Is that more appropriate?

 

I do not think you read enough of the Hall of Shame.

Where you went wrong: we don't want to be part of some convoluted roleplaying situation without being informed first.

Though, to be fair, even if you had posted a thread that actually enlightened us on the subject matter rather than acting like a complex bot (your name is even somewhat suspicious) or just a person with a strange sense of humor, people would likely still be annoyed as most of us don't RP.

Were you aiming to roleplay or did you want advice/constructive criticism on your story?

 

Ah. That makes sense.

I'm not sure I would call it roleplay, but yeah. I was hoping other people would play along.

For my fanfiction I was going to intersperse Harry's subjective experience with a fictional person's forum posts asking for help playing the game. I wasn't coming up with anything interesting to write on my own, so I wrote the original post in hopes something said here would jumpstart my imagination.

In any future situations I'll be sure to explain myself and not just jump straight into a bizarre/confusing post with no context.

EDIT:
While we're on the subject, can you think of a better place for me to post this? (with the proper context, obviously)

 

Work by Author? But thats only if you want help with the story, grammer, pacing, plot, ect. I'm not sure people will be up for actual interaction. You could try though?

Try spacebattles perhaps.

 

I have a feeling this thread is destined for the Hall of Shame.

 

Honestly stories on ffn get a lot friendlier reception than here, especially new authors. But you could try WBA. Although I don't think it is a great idea for new users to start posting there first thing. I don't know how much help we can give you jump starting your imagination and stories aren't usually well received if they need a ton of help with grammar and spelling. I'd suggest lurking and reading stories in the WBA before submitting anything there.

 

Anya: Ooh, Spacebattles. I didn't think of them, but that sounds like a good fit for what I'm going for here.

LT2000: Wouldn't surprise me, or even upset me.

bob99: Thanks for the feedback.

Cheddartrek: Thank you for the specific and constructive feedback.

 

/me clears throat

Man, this thread really brings me back. I don't know how many months I sank in the Harry Potter games when I was younger. They were the shit, especially the Underground Vaults of Gringotts. I must have died like a thousand times to the fucking multiplying galleons of doom in the Horcrux Hunt quest line - or the Dragon outside - and I was the master of every cart-ride route in the bank railroad minigame. I must still have my copy somewhere, though my SNES is resting busted inside one of the countless boxes in my garage.

/me looks for it anyway

/aaaaaaand scene

...

I think the OP was looking for something like this? I could be wrong, though.

 

Yeah, that's pretty much what I thought he meant. And it's stupid.

 

THANK YOU!

Yes, something like that. Exactly like that.



I don't remember the Horcrux Hunt questline very well, but I usually didn't make it past the third or fourth year myself.

The one time I made it to the end of the game, the main quests for the last 3 years were HP and the: 5) League of Crysalmanth, 6) Serpent's Apprentice, and 7) Imperial Regalia.



Red Aviary: Yeah, that's the impression that I get from pretty much every place I try to post this.
Disappointing, but... oh, well.

 

Meh, I've seen stupider threads. And it's a change of pace, I'll give it that much. Sort of a brainstorming session combined with a bullshitting contest. No point in bitching at the guy for trying something different. It might be stupid, but it's definatly more entertaining then the usual shitposts.

/ontopic

Yeah, I remember those games. They were kinda hokey, filled with cliche bullshit, like that one questline that you could only get to by finding that book at the Dursley's. The hidden treasure rooms and all those subquests where you never actually got anything worthwhile for finishing. I always felt like an idiot for putting in so much effort for such a bullshit reward.

 

Yeah, I remember these. I think they're what started my loathing of fetch quests and trade chains. I mean, come on. Fetch quests are the epitome of laziness, and the lost & found board was essentially a way to pad the gameplay while you killed time, either waiting for something to happen in one of the main quests (like waiting for Hermione to finish the Polyjuice Potion) or just doing something.

And the trade chains? At least Zelda's trade chains resulted in something useful, like the Biggoron Sword. Here, it was something dumb like supposedly receiving one of Hermione's ties that gave +5 to INT, and even then intelligence was really only useful to speed the process of learning spells. Why would I want to be a better learner when I picked Harry on the Character Select screen in the first place? He already comes with aptitude in DADA, which is essentially the only area in the game where you learn spells that will do something.

Also, fuck the Basilisk boss fight. Fuck it so much.

 

Yeah. You can blast through a good chunk of the game with nothing but DADA spells, but in doing so you'll miss unlockable dialogue and a few out-of-the-way power-ups.

Besides, I would usually save-scum so that I got the Deathly Hallow on Christmas first year. Doing so made it so that I could skip several battles without having to spend any points on disillusionment.
Of course, that meant that I was locked out of acquiring any of the other major artifacts, like the Gauntlet of Might in Year 3 or the Staff of the Magi in Year 4.

Hmm. Now that I think about it, maybe that's why I never got very far. The one time I successfully completed the game, I had picked up the Benevolent Jewel instead of the Invisibility Cloak, boosting my MAG instead of my stealth and putting me on the path to collect the Imperial Regalia for my seventh year instead of the Deathly Hallows.

I guess that made a larger difference than I thought?

Oh, my God, the Basilisk fight. I had forgotten about that, thanks for reminding me.

My friend swore he had picked up an item at Platform 9 & 3/4 that let him beat the basilisk in one turn. I followed the vague instructions he gave me as best I could, but I never found the item.

I'm ashamed of how long it took me to realize he lied to me.