Title: Shattered Illusions of Safet
Author: Mykkila09 and Tonks-is-Cool
Rating: M/NC-17
Genre: Romance/Drama
Status: Work-In-Progress at 402,000 words
Library Category: Dark Arts, Romance, NC-17
Pairings: Harry/Draco, Neville/Luna, Tom/Severus
Summary: A HP/DM fic; Dark Harry. Starts after the DOM battle; when Harry loses Sirius, he decides to drop his act of being the naive golden boy and shows his true nature. How will the Light react when their "Savior" is suddenly for the Dark side?
Link: Rise of the Dark Angel-Main Story: http://archiveofourown.org/works/445916/chapters/762852
Apprehension-Side story to chapters 6 and 7 of Rise of the Dark Angel: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6311631/1/Apprehension-Shattered-Illusions-of-Safety-I
Darkness Unleashed-Side story to chapter 7 of ROTDA: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6339515/1/Darkness-Unleashed-Shattered-Illusions-part-II
Our Choices Define Us-Side story to chapter 8 of ROTDA: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6643685/1/Our-Choices-define-us-part-of-Shattered-Illusions
Just Talking?-Side story to chapter 11 of ROTDA: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6945261/1/Just-Talking-Shattered-Illusions-of-Safety-IV


I'm certain many of you are slightly dubious of my suggestions after In Servitude to the Dark, and after going over it again, yeah, you all had a point. But this story is far more mature than that one probably ever could be. Yes, there is slash in this, but the discussions over the war, Dumbledore's manipulations and who is actually in the right. The story starts in a slightly different Battle of the Department of Mysteries, and when Sirius dies, Harry loses it. Starting with a nice torture of Bellatrix, followed by a far more destructive assault on Dumbledore's office, Harry shows a nature so Dark that even Venon and Petunia fear him when he returns to Privet Drive. All of which leads to a discussion with Severus that changes the course of the Second Blood War, and who will win it.

 

Seriously?

/10char

 

"Harry/Draco"

"Lucius/Remus"

"Voldemort/Snape"

"naive golden boy"

"Dark side"

Do you honestly expect anyone to read this without mocking you? I mean, what on earth made you think this was a good idea?

 

Why do I have a premonition that this will turn out to be shit? Maybe the inconsistency of a character suddenly doing 180 degree turn about his ideals and values and showing his "true nature"? Or the fact of changing heterosexual characters into homosexuals for no apparent reason?

Also, checking out the authors - whose names should point out their age quite clearly - and their other works, we can see a plethora of slash fics in some other fandoms. Therfore, we can deduce this is nothing more than slash fic, trying to perform an independant!Harry gimmick.

 

Don't judge until you read it, ladies and/or gentlemen. And tell me, how can you determine age based on pen names?

 

Are you a troll? Be honest.

 

if the author was any good, he'd use a better phrase in his summary than 'naive golden boy'.

 

It may have a bit of a cliché start, but it gets better. Also, I thought the rules stated that we couldn't judge simply because of the pairings? If so, then why do you?

 

Hey guys, the purpose of the thread is to review material submitted.

Lets take a step back from the bashing until someone actually reads the story eh?

Not gonna lie, have absolutely no interest in reading something like this. So I'll say nothing on the topic.

Although Hadrian, you probably could of picked a less controversial fic for us to review. 95% of this forum (me included) will look at all the slash and just say NOPE.

 

I kind of figured that, but I honestly don't know any stories where Harry is on Voldemort's side and straight. Then again, that may be because I prefer stories where Harry is paired with either Hermione or Draco.

 

Sure, in honor of china banning this shit, I should read some.

huh, thats a nasty mispelling there.

This is a lie. They never use pup again. Instead remus calls harry cub. I'm more baffled than anything.

No explanation, no preamble, just boom, wandless magic?

Nope. NOPE.

Aaaaand I'm done.
1/5. Even made it through to the second chapter. Forget the slash, the pairings, or the darkness. THat all apparently occurs later. This just isn't cohesively written. Poor grammar, poor exposition, trying too hard dialogue and baffling and confusing narrative.

 

I don’t mind slash, but I’m side-eyeing that summary like nothing else.

Ehh.

Ehhhhhh.

Chapter one has amateur writing. Point of view shifts randomly so the reader can know a character’s thoughts, dialogue tags are everything but ‘said’, Harry calls Sirius “Siri”, Sirius calls Harry “pup”, Harry randomly hates Ginny, Ginny / Ron / Herminoe sending glares at Harry for no reason.

Paragraph quoted for emphasis.

Wow.

No, I’m sorry, this isn’t a good fic. It doesn’t have respect for many of the characters and it’s saturated with clichés. I looked at the posting dates, and it was apparently started in 2012 and has just recently updated. It’s way behind the times. Even if the writing was A+, there’s no getting away with this characterization Dumbledore, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny.

1.5/5, because the writing isn't totally horrible.

 

I've actually read a few chapters of this. I'm not one to judge on pairings, so here's an honest opinion in brief.

It's a mediocre piece of work. The characters aren't well written, the pacing isn't great, the writing in its technical aspect leaves much to be desired and it has little to no draw to the reader. It's boring. At best I'd give this a 2/5 and that's a shaky score. Not even worth being in the Almost Recommendable thread.

Does OP deserve to be lambasted for posting slash? Nah, that's alright as long as it's great. This isn't great. This doesn't even approach good. Please don't post garbage for the library.

 

It does seem like he's trolling, especially if you consider that this is second recc and both seem to be specifically tailored to contain elements that DLP generally loathes.

 

Since now two people have asked, no, I'm not 'trolling', whatever that means. Yes, my first rec was terrible, but I will admit that I hadn't read that one in a while. This one I have, and if you are willing to read past the clichés to chapter five, it gets better, especially with what I believe is currently a unique twist on the Harry Potter stories. Starting in chapter six, the Horcruxes come into play, and the first side story takes place-and I will admit that Tonks-is-Cool is a far better writer than Mykilla. Then starting in chapter 9 there are, believe it or not, philosophical discussions about the war. Really, the only problems with the series is the clichéd start and how easily certain people change sides, unless of course, you don't support slash.

 

OP, stop. Read some stuff from the Library, read some stuff from the WBA, and stop reading these kinds of stories.

Also, another piece of advice. Next time you want to post something, post it in the Almost Reccomended thread first. If, and only if, it gets a positive reaction, you should post it for review.

Judging by the rest of the story, the 'philosophical discussions' will be stuff that even an eight year old could dissprove.

 

Since two legimate reviews have been posted, and the summary had already made things clear enough, I'm going to threat this post as a summary for the recommended fic and review this instead.

First, we open with a textbook reply nrT. 'No, and what even is a troll'. This, of course, completely assuages all my fears of being made fun of. This means, that the recommender is a serious, serious person, and we should really put every bad phrasing aside, and worship the new ways of reading fiction.

The next sentence makes it clearer still. Apparently, there have been more recommendations before, and they were worse. Ah, no, lets not judge - I haven't even searched for the recommendation in question, although I feel like I don't need to. Putting the quality of the previous recommendation aside, now I know the way to deal with DLP recommendations. First, offer a mediocre story you haven't read in a while, and after it gets rejected, offer another one without going to think on why the first one was rejected. Seems like a foolproof strategy.

Then we get the trusted weapon of 'if you can read past the cliches'. Whenever anyone brandishes this sword, you know that he means serious business. After all, if you ignore enough, everything becomes good an enjoyable. If you manage to get past the pain, hitting your head on the wall is a valid (and fun) passtime. Obviously.

But that's not all, there's a unique twist. This is a beatiful statement. A unique twist can be anything and anywhere, and to top it off, by saying that it's a twist, not only you don't need to elaborate, nor suggest on the nature of this incredibly unique event, but you must leave it just at that. Because otherwise, we might have a clue as to the nature of the twist, and that would be a spoiler. An unexpected twist, by the way, isn't a good thing on its own. The twist need to have groundwork, clues, or be the one that makes sense. At the same, time, yes, it needs to have an impact of something you didn't see coming. In this vein, judging from the other posts and quotes I'm going to assume that Harry turns out to be a special kind of Phoenix, unlike Hedwig, and that the twist is that it's not going to come up ever again in the story. Then again, I might be wrong and we should read the whole thing before judging.

Then, we arrive at the twist of the post. Apparently, Tonks-Is-Cool (and I can't argue with this, since Tonks is, or rather was, pretty cool in the books) writes the side stories which are better. Assuming these stories are on Horcruxes, they presumably have no bashable characters nearby and are only informative of their current locations or nature, I could see how these chapters are proving better. After all, if you remove the interactions between characters, the pointless over the top personalities and needless inner thoughts, I'd say that reading short side stories would prove a better experience. I'll leave this experience to my imagination.

Do you think the Diadem Voldemort was girlier than the others, or, because of the nature of artifact, he could discuss things with his feminine side as a side effect?

Ah, and I get my answer. Apparently, the diadem Voldemort holds a philosophical discussion about war. I can already imagine a debate of centuries, bolstered by the power of Rowena Ravenclaw, on the oh so diverse and complex topic as war. Since we know it's 'Harry fights for the dark side' story, this must be a place to give justification for Voldemort. I'd imagine it explains why there should be a war in the first place, touching on the necessity of torture, killings and the right of every American to bear a gun... I meant the right for every wizard to be able to use unforgivables. That's probably it. War must happen so every wizard could Imperio their way through Ministry paperwork. This debate, most probably will convince us to go outside and start hitting the people who look at us wrong. Because that's what moving and strong philosophy does to people.

And, in conclusion we have the last gem of the post. The story is great - except for the cliches running rampant, and the base premise of the story being unbelievable. If Harry switches sides as often as Ron and Hermione, I'd certainly find it unbelievable. But, of course that is unimportant in itself, because the philosophical debates about war will bring us a better, war filled tomorrow.

And for the record, I support slash. Same as I support low quality writing, stupid ideas getting published and and most everything else. Just, same as you have a right to write whatever bullshit you want, I keep on the right to not read whatever medium those ideas are presented on. Hell, you could have skipped reading this post.

Won't rate the fic.

The thread is at least 2/5, though, since I like the defensive position the recommender has taken. It made a decent read. Otherwise, the thread is kinda stale, even if I liked the attempts at reviewing.

 

I'm sorry but philospophical discussions on war don't excuse overuse of cliches, terrible pacing, and riddiculously over-the-top characterization. That 'twist' is certainly not something to brag about either.

 

You lose all and any credibility you possessed with this statement. There is nigh no one now who isn't already enlightened to what trolling is. Even if you are the x->inf (e^(pi*i)+1)/2^(log(x)) percent of people on the internet who aren't aware of what "trolling" is, a simple google search can easily alleviate your ignorance.

You're almost 100% certainly trolling by making this statement. Either that, or you're a fucking idiot. In either case, nobody wants to read your recommendation.

Pretending to be ignorant doesn't give you plot armor. I'll grant that it wouldn't be impossible to do a Harry/Draco, Dark!Harry destroys the Light story right, but it would be an uphill battle, that's for sure. Even if it were a well written example of this, most people would reject this story on here I think anyway, just because a story like that doesn't match out tastes. In the case here, the idea is shit and the writing is shit.

If you're from some far-off forum trying to make your point here about inclusion, slash fics or bash this board or something along those lines, you made your point now knock it off before you embarass yourself further. We've had people like you act like this here and you won't last much longer. We aren't going to tolerate blatant trolling in the library.

 

He's not trolling. He genuinely likes this fic and thinks it is quality. I don't know how or why, but he does.