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Almost Recommended fanfiction - From barely readable to almost good

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by ip82, Jan 14, 2006.

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  1. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Title: my life (I didn't forget to press shift, the author did, which happens to her quite often)
    Author: DebsTheSnapeFanNow
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2590471/1/

    This girl is the prime author of those awful "Harry's sibling is BWL, while Harry's being abused" kind of stories. She must have written at least 5-6 of them, not to mention a few H/S romances and a Severitus or two... Yep, she's a Snape fan, alright.

    As for this story, you'll probably give up after a chapter or two - terrible writting style, plot holes all over the place, unexisting characterisation (yes, James and Lilly just turn into assholes for no reason at all), awfully rushed (except when there's some sappy shit going on) and with abundace of errors of every kind. Even capitalisation is all screwed up, like she couldn't even be arsed to spend two additional minutes to fix it. Hell, even her story titles and summaries are riddled with errors.

    So why did I read around 10 chapters of this shit? Well, coz it features a combination of super!Harry, smart!Harry and slytherin!Harry. What can I say, I'm a sucker for the stories where Harry learns things on his own and then hides it from everyone. Too bad that realisation of this idea is not worth a shit.
     
  2. Silent

    Silent Kinky Wench

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    Look on the bright side - authors with good ideas and poor execution often have excellent favourites lists. She does, except for too much Snape-liking for any single list of stories. Doesn't the girl get bored of the same character every once in a while?
     
  3. Aquylyne

    Aquylyne First Year

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2006
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    Location:
    dunno theres no windows here
  4. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    You forgot to mention one important fact...

    It's fucking Harry/Cedric!

    Harry and Cedric had always thought they only had feelings for girls. But after they meet and a friendship blooms, a new feeling slowly overtakes both of them. Struggling separately to find out what ails them, Harry and Cedric only know that this thing, this thing takes hold of them whenever they’re in each other’s presence. They can’t describe it, and both are initially unwillingly or unable to admit their true feelings, especially when they are confused themselves.

    This thing…a thing called love.
     
  5. ShadowedDarkness

    ShadowedDarkness Second Year

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    67
    Good to hear about Twist of Fate, Black Rose I had started reading hoping you might have some good dumbledore getting flumoxed moments but then he ups and leaves with the order of the wolf and I stopped reading at that point.
     
  6. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2005
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    6,141
    Gender:
    Male
    I was reading some story that had Harry as some Male Veela-type Demon and it looked really good. Then the slash appeared... Harry and Cedric dated in 4th year... URGH!
     
  7. razz

    razz Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2006
    Messages:
    224
    Location:
    Melbourne
    Title: Snapes Invisible Friend
    Author: teacherbev
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2690841/1/


    WARNING: Don't read if you've just eaten - I wouldn't wont to be responsible for anyone choking on their own vomit. I really liked the idea behind this, but I can't stand a chocolate coated care-bear-snape. The writing is average, the plot is slow, and the characterisation of Poor!Misunderstood!Redeemed!Severus is sickening at best. "No Mary-Sue's" my arse.

    I didn't get past chapter five, but if you can stand it, there's a sequel now and everything.
     
  8. Lutris

    Lutris Jarl Dovahkiin DLP Supporter

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    How on earth did you find this? I'd think you should get this fic put in to the S&P section. Youknow, just for kicks.

    No, really.
     
  9. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Yeah, I remember trying to read this coz of reasonably powerful & sneaky Harry figuring out magic at an early age.

    But the way it's written...ugh! I managed to last maybe 5-6 chapters before giving up on it. Jesus Christ, if I had to read another clinical description of Harry's state and whether he's toilet trained or not and his various injuries and Snape's assesment of his psychology... and then repeat that in EVERY FUCKING CHAPTER ARRRGH!!!

    This girl is fucking obsessed with babies... and Snape. This has nothing to do with HP at all, it's just some sick pre-teen's fantasy about having a baby and a mysterious, dark man to look after it. She should return to playing with her barbie house.
     
  10. razz

    razz Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2006
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    224
    Location:
    Melbourne
    In her profile it says:

    Blah Blah BLAH. Is she trying to make people feel guilty? Does the sob story really work? Is she serious? If you were disabled, would you write it in your fucking bio? And, honestly, who puts the words 'daughter', 'fanfiction' and 'turned me on' is the same sentence?

    haha. :shock:
     
  11. Lutris

    Lutris Jarl Dovahkiin DLP Supporter

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    I probably would, just to see the reactions of people, but hey, I probably share sentiments with the rest of the site population, so no worries there.

    And NAAAH, she's not.

    She's obviously a Snape fan.



    I just HAD to get that Sirius/Serious joke in there somehow
     
  12. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Well, if she's a teacher that explains her style...

    The way she describes caring for a baby, it's like someone whose job is to do that sort of shit.
     
  13. Violent Seas

    Violent Seas Sixth Year

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2006
    Messages:
    173
    Location:
    the US
    Title: So You Think You Know Me?
    Author: Jay Tee
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2352206/1/



    Let's see.....


    H/G.
    has some of those cliches that you see so often that you just wanna bash the author's head. ("Harry, you're Gryffindor's heir!!!".


    Pretty damn bad. I could barely get through this...
     
  14. DarkPhoenix2500

    DarkPhoenix2500 Second Year

    Joined:
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    69
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    United States
    >_> The last one was just bad, The first like 2 or 3 chapters is people mourning over sirius, then harry learns occulemcy and all this crap over the summer just like that <_< the way its set up is horrible, cant tell when there is a scene break or not, Theres way too many plot holes too <_< Cant believe i actually went and read that too.......
     
  15. razz

    razz Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2006
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    224
    Location:
    Melbourne
    I gave up after three paragraphs.

    Ugh. Why do people insist on making Harry a poor little depressed orphan boy? I just can't stand Abused!Pathetic!Wimp!Harry fics. Ak. Spare me.
     
  16. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Title: Harry Potter And The Rise Of The Gray Sorcerer
    Author: SushiZ
    Summary: Post OOTP. Harry begins training in ligh and dark magic. He will no longer stand for Dumbledore's liesIndependent Harry. Darker Harry but not evil Thanks for reviews. sorry ill make next chap double spaced
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2743338/1/

    Dark! and Independant! Harry breaks off Dumbledore and his traitorous friends and starts practising both dark & light magic... So, another story made by standard Power of Time mould, with a few unique additions of its own, right?

    Wrong.

    This story has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING unique in it at all.

    It's one "Power of Time" clishe after another from the first misspelled word to the last. I'm sorry, but never before have I seen something so clished and unimaginative as this shit. This is like taking all the independant post-OOTP stories, making a list of ideas seen in them, picking 10 or 20 of the most often used ones and then arranging them in one below-average typed scene after another. Yes, I like this genre and all, but this shit is simply too terrible to be taken seriously.

    If you're writting an Independant!Harry story, and need a comprehensive manual of what ideas NOT to use, than this is a perfect solution. Otherwise, stay away.
     
  17. DarkPhoenix2500

    DarkPhoenix2500 Second Year

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    >_> Is it just me...or are more and more people using Ragnok/Ragnorak as the Head goblin?, The paragraphs and format was atroucious(sp?) people need to learn to space out the speaking, i hate how its all cluttered together like that >_> i didnt even bother reading it, just skimmed most of it
     
  18. DGD

    DGD Headmaster

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2005
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    1,075
    Location:
    Wisconsin, USA
    I think it's an old fanon invention. But yeah, lots of storys picked it up.
     
  19. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Title: Coming of Age
    Author: ImmortalKing
    Summary: Harry is trying to deal with Sirius' death when he gets a letter from bellatrix asking for a meeting. What will happen to our hero? read to Find out. Rated M for excessive violence, strong use of four letter words, and a few love scenes. Not for most
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2693286/1/

    Another poor Harry/Bellatrix story, in my oppinion.

    In chapter one Harry is just thinking how he actually doesn't hate Bella and how she was actually under imperious when she'd snuffed out Sirius, when he receives an owl from her, requesting a meeting. They meet and she swears on her magic, life and other related crap that she's actually all good and sweet. In the end, they end up as best friends, with Bella thinking how cute Harry is.

    Second chapter is even worse - Griphook & Ragnok, inheritence, Lord Black-Potter, Tonks bowing to wishes of snot-nosed Lord Harry, Dumbledore-bashing... one poorly written clishe after another.

    I must admit that the way Bellatrix had been controled and released is original, but everything else is averagely written crap. There are 3 more chapters beyond the spot I'd stopped, so if it gets better, feel free to post it in normal categories. As for me, I refuse to read another word of this shit.
     
  20. Silent

    Silent Kinky Wench

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    I read that a while ago. There are some good ideas, but the author should have given them to someone else to write. Some parts of it were just... eech.
     
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