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Complete To Fight the Coming Darkness by jbern - T

Discussion in 'General Fics' started by cmuylistoooo, Dec 22, 2005.

  1. Master Slytherin

    Master Slytherin Headmaster

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    User CP -> Look in the column on the right -> Edit Signature.

    It's as simple as that.
     
  2. brad

    brad Third Year

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    Oh dear. I think the *severity* of her breaking the oath - her state while the oath remains broken - should be severe, yes. Very frightening, Molly & Arthur distraught, Weasleys and others being triggered by the event into questioning Harry's suitability for command, etcetera. It could be a great means by which Harry is again split from his friends (I've enjoyed how Ron and Hermione are his mates again; but would something like this - Hermione is Ginny's friend too? - cause Hermione to again question what Harry's doing?).

    But the 'every Disney movie has a happy ending' part of me is hoping that, once Harry releases her from her vow, she'll be OK. But I grant you - a realistic story might very well leave her with some lasting nerve/other damage, and JBern may do exactly that.

    In which case I'm holding you responsible ... :)

    I disagree. I'm starting to forget the first parts of this story - I'm a bad serial reader - but is Harry formally in charge of the Abbotts or the others? It's not like the Abbott sisters are in the army and he's their superior! They did what they thought was the best thing, for what they thought were good reasons. Supporting a friend's love life is very small and juvenile potatoes compared with what Harry was doing, but *they didn't know* what he was doing.

    No, Susan raps them on the knuckles, tells them that she trusts Harry and they should trust her, etcetera, but maybe nothing worse than that.

    Maybe they can be tasked with healing Ginny's pain, if she's left with side-effects from the breaking of the vow.[/QUOTE]
     
  3. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

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    Let me get this straight: they abduct her, kidnap her, take her wand, use a highly questionable magical talent which very well may be illegal, one that even the Headmaster made them promise to not use in school (and were he paying attention I suspect would have made them promise not to use on school grounds not just during session), with the intent of raking her mind for information and then obliviating her of the entire incident. The result of their actions are she's been forced to break an oath, is currently in lots of pain, perhaps irreparable harm, and you think the best solution is forgive and forget, no harm done?

    So let's say Malfoy kidnaps and rapes Susan, sticks her back in bed and then obliviates her. Susan wakes up with a little soreness but is none the wiser. No harm, no foul? Oh wait,there was a magical oath that if she ever slept with anyone other than Harry, she would undergo eternal pain and permanent scarring for the rest of her life.

    But as long as Malfoy's motivation was reservations that her silly hymen would get in Harry's way, it's okay. He was just worried about blood getting on the sheets.

    It's only Susan's body. And it's only Ginny's mind. The intentions are honorable. Sometimes we just have to do things we'd rather not for the greater good.

    The issue is, no matter what their intentions were, they didn't slightly cross the line, they took the line's children, raped them, and forced the line to watch. This wasn't an issue of the war even. This wasn't an issue of life and death. This was idiotic teenagers acting like psychotic criminals. They merely needed their curiosities answered. That's it. They were worried about their friend's boyfriend and if he was cheating.
     
  4. Mage

    Mage Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    A Great chapter. The Abbot sisters pissed me off, even if it was ginny, but you were trying to make them be disliked so kudos. That is also very realistic and when you think about it, doesnt that sound like something harry would do if he felt that it was needed. I have to say that i think my favorite part was dumbles getting rid of the acromantulas while still having them as allies. You have made a great Dumbledore in this fic imo. He his manipulative and cunning, but is still doing whats best for the light side (at least he thinks he is.)

    The plot about using the life debt was ingenious, tons of stories give them out but how many actually put them to use? I dont think that this is the end of Voldemort because that would be to simple, and i actually hope it isn't because you have an amazing story going on. As for the cliffy, yes it was evil but the built up suspense just makes the story better. Eagerly awaiting your next update

    elvin
     
  5. redviking1983

    redviking1983 First Year

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    First off, Harry is NOT responsible for the Abbotts. He might, and I say might here, be responsible for Ginny depending on how your look at it. When Ginny made her oath she effectivley agreed to serve under Harry’s command for the duration of the mission. It was a short tour of duty granted, but still a tour of duty. That made Harry her defacto commanding officer for the duration of the mission. This is all circumstancial however, as is Harry’s being responsible for Ginny. Think of it this way: if your sexually harassed at work you can sue not only your harasser, but your employer too. That’s one of the reasons they have code of conduct laws at the workplace, so you can’t sue your employeer. By doing what they did, the Abbots not only fucked Ginny, but possibly Harry too!

    As for Harry demaning damages from the Abbotts—even if he’s not responsible for Ginny he can still take action against them. The wizarding world needs Harry to be their savior—Dumbles knows this—so if he decides to fuck with the Abbots he can. He probably won’t, since he’s not sadistic, but if he did Dumbledore wouldn’t let anything happen to him!

    As for the Abbots doing what they thought was right.....what the fuck! They didn’t do what they thought was right! They knew it was wrong! They kidnapped Ginny, subdued her and then raped her mind! That kidnapping, assault and battery and rape! I don’t know wizarding law, but that’s PROBABLY punishable by some time in Azkaban! And lets not forget WHY they did it! They wanted to find out if Harry was cheating on Ginny. It wasn’t life or death, it was 2 idiot teenage bitches worried about their friends love life. If you think your girlfriend is cheating on you with some guy do you kidnap the guy, tie him up and force feed him truth serium? No! If you did you’d go to jail for a very long time! Why should what the Abbott sisters did be any different???
     
  6. jbern

    jbern Alba Mater

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    Wow lots of debate here. I'm impressed. Thanks to Elvin) for being my 1000th review. Pretty cool milestone.

    People aren't going to be happy with the Abbott sisters. There will be reprcussions. There will be fallout. I've just about wrapped up chapter 11 of Bungle and I get to start on chapter 23 soon. I'll have a tease up on Monday or Tuesday, but fair warning it will probably be the Abbott sisters bringing Ginny into the infirmary and not the Harry/Voldy scene that you are looking for. I know it's cruel, but I promise the payoff will be worth it.

    Jim
     
  7. Vengashii

    Vengashii Banned

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    This is why women shouldn't be allowed to attend school anymore.
     
  8. cubdom

    cubdom Guest

    ha ha ha ha... you kill me, Inferius.
     
  9. brad

    brad Third Year

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    Ouch. Most embarassing; I'm forced to retract my previous comment. Here I am stating that Ginny's situation should be drawn out in great detail/agony so as to emphasise the severe repercussions of the breaking of a magic oath, and in order to fragment the good guys, and then on the other hand I'm letting the Abbott girls get away with it almost scot-free! They should AK them both!

    My excuse - I must have read that part of the chapter rather quickly, because I was likening it more to (just) bully-boy tactics by teenage schoolgirls. I didn't pick up on their intent to wipe Ginny's mind of the incident, for example. I'll be more careful next time (this forum should have DANGER! signs posted for the lazy/unprepared!). Thanks for keeping me straight.

    Also, I guess the severity of their actions was ameliorated in some way in my mind because Ginny's breakdown wasn't a desired outcome of their actions. But you're right - manslaughter might be a somewhat lesser crime to murder, but it still carries a very severe penalty, even if the death was unintentional.

    I still think it might be fitting if part of the Abbott's punishment might be to use their mental abilities to help Ginny recover, should she have lasting damage from the breach of her vow.

    What are *you* suggesting their punishment be? Breaking their wands? Beyond that?
     
  10. thapagan

    thapagan High Inquisitor

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    I think the "danger signs" are called the board rules.
    Maybe the should be high lighted with a different color or something to
    stress their importance but that is a decision above my pay scale.

    Sometimes I think of putting severus and albus in front of a international secret star chamber like council of the mind arts, boy this would not be a good time for this group to make their presence know if they exist.
    If Ginny survives, the abbott's at the very least will have to performs magical vows to enforce future good behavior, but if she dies they should be in real trouble.

    Or order of merlin winners, it is a fickle public.
     
  11. redviking1983

    redviking1983 First Year

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    Here’s a thought...A while back there was a lot of discussion on whether Ginny would become evil. Penny said that she wasn’t stable and could possibly be cultivated as an ally of the Death Eaters provided the right steps are taken / motivation is applied.

    Now, up until this point Ginny has been strong anti-Voldie and light oriented (attempted rape not withstanding). But, what if the Abbott’s use of legilmency has accidently unhinged the part of Ginny’s mind that has, up till this point, caged whatever small part of Tom Riddle was left from the Diary fiasco?

    Suddenly Ginny has Voldemort’s voice in her head whispering suggestions to her. Sort of like the metaphorical devil on your sholder. Maybe Voldie can evil feel that part of Ginny’s mind and implant suggestions / orders to her.

    Just a thought on the possible fall of Ginny Weasley...
     
  12. rj_stone2

    rj_stone2 Seventh Year

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    Even setting aside the likely criminal penalties, Ginny (or her family) should at least sue the Abbotts for all they're worth. The Weasleys could use the money, after all.
     
  13. prometheus

    prometheus Guest

    To be honest I don't quite understand the anti-Ginny sentiments. Aside from the fact that the character seems to have an unwarranted popularity in fanfiction, I personally don't feel that she has been developed enough as a character in Canon for me to have an opinion either way.

    But I do see the oppourtunity that JBern has created for giving the character of "Ginny" real depth in the story. What is a character if not the end result of a series of circumstances?

    What she feels, how she reacts... does she want revenge? Can she somehow manipulate the situation to get Harry and take Susan down a peg or two?

    I see real potential to give her character some real depth, which most fanfictions sorely lack.

    And yes, the authors who feel the urge to make Ginny into some sort of super sorceress, a soul-mate for Harry at the age of eleven, the one who finally slaps some sense into Harry after Sirius's death (my pet-peeve), all these things annoy me as well.

    However, characters are born anew from the imagination of different authors. Just because the name happens to be the same doens't mean the character is.

    I am really looking forward to see where JBern takes the story.

    p.s. I loved how Harry possessed Peter's body. Loved it. My favourite scene in fanficiton. Totally awesome.
     
  14. redviking1983

    redviking1983 First Year

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    I have a rather general question here...

    Dept. of Magical Law Enforcement: Who does what?
    I get the feeling that the Aurors are a mix between ATF/FBI & SWAT and the DMLE Watch-Wizards are your standard cops....but what about Hit-Wizards. Depending on the story their Assassins for hire (doesn't make sense as the Ministry wouldn't employ them...not publicly anyways) or Bodyguards. I get the feeling that Hit-Wizards are more like Bounty Hunters in the wizarding world...they take on the worst jobs that even Aurors are afraid to do and get their hands dirty.

    Any thoughts anyone?
     
  15. Mordecai

    Mordecai Drunken Scotsman –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

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    According to PoA page 155 British version,"Nobody but highly trained Hit Wizards from the Magical Law Enforcement Squad"

    To me, the capitalization of Hit Wizards, shows it is a specific title. And the fact that it is part of the Magical Law Enforcement Squad, shows it is an official position. I reckon, that it is simply a mistake on JKR's side of things. She hadn't thought up Auror's yet, and the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, was simply a Squad. So, I get the feeling that they are simply Aurors, maybe they are slightly different. Perhaps they are trained to capture, and Aurors re trained to take down. Something like that.

    Also, is this posted in the right place, should it not be a new thread in the General Forum, or the Fanfic Discussion Forum.
     
  16. redviking1983

    redviking1983 First Year

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    That might be true in canon...but in this story it's a bit different I think. If I remember correctly Scrimgeour made Harry and Susan Hit-Wizards: giving them the right to wear body armour and take down DE's without worring about redtape (paperwork not withstanding ;0 ). Jbern, what are your thoughts on this? It's your story after all.
     
  17. benwa

    benwa Squib

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    back to the discussion about the abbot sisters and ginslut, what the sisters did was wrong and should have gone about things a bit differently. i feel ginslut deserved some of what she is going through tho because of her attempted rape of harry, which i feel is worse because it would have turned harrys body to like ginslut. so i think maybe a lil repercusion but otherwise not a lot should be handed to the abbot sisters.
     
  18. jbern

    jbern Alba Mater

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    Chapter 23 is up!

    Author's notes Chapter 23

    First a couple of responses to previous posts. In my stories a Hit Wizard is a freelancer, a bounty hunter if you will. They could be as simple as a wand for hire / mercenary or a bodyguard (like Kwan and Collins in my other story). Aurors are aurors, ministry operatives for maintaining order and catching dark wizards. Someone like Aurthur Weasley, he would be a government official similar to a US Treasury Department Agent. He has a limited scope of authority pretaining to the misuse of muggle artifacts. Much like the privateers on the high seas in Colonial times, a Hit Wizard needs to purchase a letter of marque/license from the ministry in order to 'legally' act in their country or countries that country has treaties with. They are allowed to wear body armor and carry a second wand legally. Hit Wizards can also operate as assains or spys for the Ministries or 'under the table' for private citizens doing things that others wouldn't want to be traced back to them. Dumbledore mentioned that Lucius Malfoy had employed two hit wizards to locate and kill Harry early in his life. In this particular story Fudge had a hitwizard kill and plant evidence framing that woman Voldemort 'rescued' from Azkaban back in chapter 10. More on that in another chapter....

    Hitwizards are of varying degrees of skill. There are elite fighters like Kwan and Collins. Some are simple mercenary thugs, using their wand to make a quick galleon. In chapter 11 Voldemort mentioned a particularly nasty fight he had with a Metamorphagus Hit Wizard in Calcutta. Hope that explains my position on things.

    Scene 1 - Well most of you have seen this already, so I won't say much about it. I hope you liked the interaction between Dumbledore and Poppy as they peel away the layers of lies surrounding the truth. You would think they have practice at that sort of thing. The extent of Ginny's injuries will be addressed in chapter 24.

    Scene 2 - So did anyone see that coming? Peter's hand can't cast spells at Voldemort and Voldemort's life-debt prevented him from killing Peter. It sets up a most unusual duel and the conversation that follows. I enjoyed the irony of Peter being the Secret Keeper. A quick nod to all the Pyro's on this board with the 'Fire Always Makes it Better' line. Another bit of humor is that Voldemort's repetoire of incapacitating spells is woefully inadequate. Harry using his learn by doing thing, trying to jumpstart his own animagus transformation (no jaguar in this story - it's different) and finally damaging Peter's prized map table. If Voldemort seemed a little too defensive here, he was shocked. Potter had him dead to rights and only the fact that he had enchanted Peter's hand never to harm him saved him from getting the quaffle sized hole in his back that was promised. For those of you wondering who Miss Beaucourt is, she was the DE that Voldy sent to Gringott's to watch Flint die a few chapters ago.

    Scene 3 - Peter Abbott was initially a bit too 2 dimensional. ChuckDaTruck and Nukular Winter really helped by making him a bit more realistic and less utterly convinced that his daughters could do no wrong. I know most of you were calling for extreme punishments, but in the end how could it end any other way. If it went to the ministry Chelsea would definitely and Hannah probably get prison time. That said, the whole ugly mess would come to light as Peter Abbott doesn't seem the kind of man to sacrifice his daughters for the cause. So he cuts a deal.

    Scene 4 - Harry's back and he's angry. He didn't get Riddle. He did some damage, but he didn't close the deal. He takes some of his raw anger out on the nearest available target - Hannah. Susan stops him, but at what cost? Will Harry be reasonable and realize that he was crossing over the line by going at Hannah like that? Or will he see Susan's actions as yet another person turning on him. Up until now, she's given him unconditional support. More on that later.... Still Harry doesn't have a chance to make up his mind as his vision is coming back and Peter sees him towering over Hannah with his wand in his hand and makes a rash decision. You can see that Harry has become more prepared by having a portkey in his possession. Paranoia is a wonderful thing! (Don't tell anyone I told you!) I joked about ending it with Harry being blown out the window and falling, but my review squad warned me that the cliffhanger wasn't strong enough and that the readers would be sharpening their pointy objects if I do this too often.

    Jim
     
  19. CGB

    CGB Auror

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    Excellent new chapter. I really loved it. Harry acting like he is is just great. I can barely wait for the next chapter.
     
  20. digitalstorm

    digitalstorm Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    Another wonderful chapter! It seems as if Chelsea will not be maimed...how about her father? I think he would a nice person to Harry to vent his anger on. Now I must find something to do until the next chapter...
     
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