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A Slowly Dying World by HoldOnTillForever - T

Discussion in 'Trash Bin' started by Dark Syaoran, Feb 13, 2006.

  1. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2005
    Messages:
    6,141
    Gender:
    Male
    Title: A Slowly Dying World
    Author: HoldOnTillForever
    Catagory: Action/Adventure/Drama
    Pairings: None
    Summary: Harry Potter never received his Hogwarts letter. He never learned of the magical world. He was never told of his past…or the future he was destined for. Instead he lived in the Muggle world, attending St. Brutus’s School for Incurable Criminal Boys. How is the Wizarding world fairing without its hero? What kind of life was Harry forced to live at the hands of the Dursley’s? What will Harry do when he learns of the many secrets that have been kept hidden from him? Severtius Challenge.

    My Summary: Don't let the Severtius Challenge scare you off yet.

    Remember the other day a few of us were talking about a Harry that went to St. Brutus's? Well, now we have one. Granted he isnt a pyro that sets people on fire or a psycho that chops people to pieces but at least we got one.

    Harry seems a little off with the life he's had, not hard or cold enough, yet that could be put down to the shock of learning that magic is real, even if he knew it was before but not to this extent.

    Sound writing, dont see much if any problems. I liked his theory on how the wards of Hogwarts are powered and why they are so weak right now. It might have been used before but either they went into it to much or didnt explain it at all.

    Harry is smarter, able to piece shit together, and looks to be pretty powerful since he broke the Ministry tracker by overloading it in a bout of accidental magic. It's just that he doesnt know how to use it so he is being trained. I have a feeling he'll pick it up quicker than the average person.

    That's all I'll tell, you can check the rest for your selves.

    Link: FanFiction.Net
     
  2. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2005
    Messages:
    2,921
    The problem with this is that it's soooo slow.

    Over 70% of the story is Harry's introspection and thoughts. That would be OK if Harry was contemplating some philosophical isses or something meaningful like that. But no, half of this fic is Harry being totally confused and trying to figure out what the hell is going on. And that's fucking irratating to read, since everyone who'd read the canon knows the answers to his questions. That'd be ok if Harry was wondering along with the readers, but like this - it only gets on my nerves. I hate reading about ignorant characters, however justifyed thair ignorance is. IMO, the author should have sped thing up and skipped endless internal debates about things we all already know about.

    The other downside is that Harry is basically a pussy on the inside - Baaa I want family! Baaa I want friends!... Little shitbag is too soft for a 16 year old who'd spent his childhood in a prison. I can already see him sobbing in Snape's arms few chapters from now.

    Other than that, the story is quite interesting, even with a few plot holes (and these two peevies). I'll keep reading it but I'll probably also keep bitchin' about it. So, it's average, I'd say.
     
  3. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

    Joined:
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    Like I said, main reason for posting it was because we were talking about a St. Brutus's!Harry just the other day. He is too soft for being around other crimmies for so long. Hopefully it might go away... lol.
     
  4. bornagainpenguin

    bornagainpenguin DLP Archivist

    Joined:
    Oct 27, 2005
    Messages:
    780
    Location:
    Illinois
    Unfortunately this fic has disappeared and the author doesn't seem to be coming up under that name anywhere.

    I have the older copy of the story included in the archives, as well as a chapter from another site, but it looks as though this one has been abandoned.

    --bornagainpenguin
     
  5. cazten

    cazten Slug Club Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2005
    Messages:
    198
    Location:
    ca
    Um... Am i the only one who doesn't know what archive your talking about? I searched the recycleBin and didnt find it, nor did i see any archive on this site?

    EDIT: NVM, found it and curently downloading.
     
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2007
  6. Scrittore

    Scrittore Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2009
    Messages:
    362
    1 star, and story no longer exists.

    Bump, Bump, Bump it up.
     
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