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Almost Recommendable Volume the Third

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by Antivash, Aug 11, 2010.

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  1. ViolentRed

    ViolentRed Professor

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    Title: Skipping Stones
    Author: MujakiX
    Rating: M
    Genre: Drama/Mystery
    DLP Category: The Alternates
    Pairing: TBD, but the author is partial to Harry/Hermione, Harry/Luna and Harry/Romilda.
    Status: WIP
    Summary: The Deathly Hallows are only the beginning... Harry Potter is 14 again in a world both alike and very different than his own. Memories are stirring beneath the surface... What steps will Harry take to protect his family? Pairings TBD...
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4915978/1/Skipping_Stones

    Five chapters in almost two years, but the last was recent and new ones should appear biweekly. First Person POV. Living family. Has the potential to get in the Library at some point, but it's still way too early to really tell.

    Good writing and grammar. The characterizations are well done, although the author's dislike for Harry/Ginny does shine through a little in the almost complete disregard of Harry's (former) feelings for her. The Harry/Hermione canon relationship, on the other hand, is emphasized. I suppose this isn't much of a problem here though.

    The Drama and Mystery elements mostly come from Harry's displacement into a different dimension and the author's slow pace in revealing this new world. The story probably won't be able to thrive on that for too long without getting stale, so its real worth will depend on the way the author deals with that. The fic is mostly suited for fans of slowly developing character driven plots and Alternative Dimensions. The amount of action scenes will probably be minimal.
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2011
  2. Klael

    Klael Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    I'm acquainted with Mujakix, and I'm pleased to report that he's getting back to fanfiction and has the next few chapters well planned. I also greatly enjoyed this, and I'd honestly put it at a 4/5 for what he's written so far--and for what I know is to come :awesome
     
  3. Heather_Sinclair

    Heather_Sinclair Chief Warlock

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    I like it so far. 19k words so far, and they'd only reached the train, so hopefully things will speed up soon.
     
  4. Warlocke

    Warlocke Fourth Champion

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    Sounds like an author after my own heart.

    WARNING:
    Warlocke has never finished a goddamned thing in his life.

    :)
     
  5. Anarchy

    Anarchy Half-Blood Prince DLP Supporter

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    Just write a 1000 word oneshot, that's how I put myself on the completion board.
     
  6. Klael

    Klael Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    I totally did that too. I never felt so proud and so ashamed at the same time in my life. :p
     
  7. Oruma

    Oruma Order Member

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    I'm wary after a bajillion of Harry-goes-to-different-dimension stories, but this one is better than I expected.
     
  8. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    He isn't our spokesperson, he's just the one who said what everyone else was thinking.
     
  9. NoxedSalvation

    NoxedSalvation Temporarily Banhammered

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    And you know that because you are ... omniscient?

    Regardless of the avatar question, I wouldn't be around anymore if I couldn't stand some bashing. I used the occasion to make an overdue change and if that eases the mind of only one single arachnophobic lurker it's a bonus to that decision.

    Edit: @Grubdubdub- I was questioning the validity of Andros and Ellisandes comments on the basis of the epistemological problems inherent in them. If you don't understand what I'm talking about, why don't you STFU and keep your unqualified opinion to yourself?
     
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2011
  10. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    You're a dumbass. You don't have to be omniscient to figure out that dumbasses are flamed.
     
  11. Feoffic

    Feoffic Alchemist DLP Supporter

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    This is a lot better than I thought it would be. The character interactions are the best part about this work, but the pace is very slow right now. My other issue is that there has yet to be any information on the plot of the story yet, but considering how slowly the author is putting all the cards on the table this isn't too big of an issue. This story could definitely be Library worthy depending on where it goes in future chapters.
     
  12. Heather_Sinclair

    Heather_Sinclair Chief Warlock

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    Title: Heir to Zod
    Author: LaughingMan1
    Rating: T
    Genre: SciFi/Adventure Smallville Crossover
    DLP Category: The Alternates
    Pairing: Kara but not as of yet.
    Status: WIP
    Summary: General Zod found a way to continue his line by hiding a crystal containing his unborn son's genetic material in the Kawatche Caves. After investigating the magic of the Native American tribes, Lily and James Potter went home with something extra.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7206553/1/Heir_To_Zod

    Only read this if you are a Smallville fan, otherwise you really won't know a lot of the backstory about what's going on.

    Grammar-wise: it's readable with a few faults.
    Plot wise: Moves too damn fast, skipping large chunks of the years where I suppose we're to assume that canon events took place. But what's written isn't too bad.

    As you've probably guessed Harry is Zod's sort-of son, and has inherited his Kryptonian abilities, growing into them like Clark has in the show. It's a little convoluted at times with Harry acting Zod'ish instead of his regular self.

    This is a guilty pleasure more than anything else. If someone wrote this as a straight Super!Harry story I would have laughed in their face, but as a Crossover fic it's a 2/5. Definitely not library material, but some of you might enjoy it.

    35k words, so far, in 3 chapters, and update rate is pretty good.
     
  13. Sin Saiori

    Sin Saiori Death Eater

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    If it does start updating bi-weekly like the author claims, and if it continues the way it is now, I'm definitely gonna put this up for review if no one else does.

    This is the first story in a while that is actually nagging at me. What are all the differences? The 'hows,' 'whys,' and 'whats'? How about the Hallows? As for the romance part, I'm game for Romilda or Luna - especially Luna - and we have yet to see what's up with Hermione, but I feel like this could be great any way it goes.

    It'll also be interesting to see how Harry and Other-Harry are reconciled. One, eighteen, a hero, and recently deceased. The other, fourteen, timid and introverted, and apparently in relatively poor standing with most of the Hogwarts community.

    Pacing is good, quality is solid, characterization is intriguing, and the update rate is supposed to pick up. Good find, Violent. Good damn find.
     
  14. T3t

    T3t Purple Beast of DLP ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I like the fic, but the mystery honestly seems contrived. He's keeping things mysterious just for the sake of it, not because that's how it would actually work. I mean, Harry couldn't find an opportunity to read a history book in the space of several months?
     
  15. Sin Saiori

    Sin Saiori Death Eater

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    I can definitely admit that the lack of any progress in the summer months bugs the hell out of me, but I'm willing to ignore it if the story can keep up/improve its quality over the next couple chapters.

    That, and the fucking mystery nagginig at me.
     
  16. Dark Minion

    Dark Minion Bright Henchman DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    You really have too much time, don't you ;) ? Though I, too, appreciate the effort.

    Whether the list should be cleaned or not is an almost philosophical question and the same problem as the library. Even abandoned fics still stay in the library.

    Vash's list is a summary of this thread, nothing more, and nothing less. Whether someone thinks a story sucks or is actually brilliant doesn't matter. I think the list lists wimvincken aka CarolWim way too often - but someone thought his stuff was worth this thread so it's on Vash's list.

    Actually I have used the list just a few times. As I am rather looking for DLP-posts related to a story than the link, I search DLP for the ff.net-number and usually get pointed at the posts in this thread or the library thread.
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2011
  17. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Heir to Zod was fun for a bit, but unfortunately Smallville and HP just don't mix very well at all and as soon as we got to action scenes it showed. With Harry's speed he should have been able to take out 10 Death Eaters before they even knew he had moved from where he was standing. Superman's powers are such that magic doesn't really make much of a difference. Sure, he's vulnerable to spells, but only if they hit him. And there really isn't any reasonable way that he could be hit.

    Equally broken in the opposite direction was giving Voldemort Kryptonian powers. With those powers he should be completely unstoppable.
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2011
  18. Heather_Sinclair

    Heather_Sinclair Chief Warlock

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    This was a big one for me as well. He should have had the chance to wipe the floor with them in about three seconds since they didn't know about his powers. I assume the author did want to make Harry that Super just yet.

    In the show Clark gets progressively faster as he gets older. I don't know how fast he was at 14 though. In closed quarters like the Hall of Prophecy he should have had more than enough time to do whatever he wanted.

    This was explained during the fight scene with V, but lamely. Something about Voldemort only receiving a power or two.

    One other thing that annoyed me: He has perfect recall and supposedly has read a bunch of books in the restricted section for spells and the like, so why the hell is he throwing just stunners at Voldemort?
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2011
  19. Klael

    Klael Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    Shouldn't Harry's skin be unbreakable by normal weapons? Even magical ones? If we're talking about the canonical graveyard scene, there's no reason to believe that the knife is in any way special, so...wouldn't they be unable to get his blood?

    FYI, I haven't read this and I don't intend to. This just seemed weird to me.

    EDIT: Yeah, Taure, that would do it for me too.
     
  20. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Yeah, the author was amazingly inconsistent with Harry's magical skills. The first fifth year scene shows Harry learning post-NEWT level charms and transfiguration. A few paragraphs later we're told that he doesn't have any special talent in anything other than DADA and even in that he'll "never be able to compete with Dumbledore or Voldemort". Then we find out that he's read 1/8th of the Hogwarts' library, but then he throws stunners at Voldemort.

    To be honest, the main reason I enjoyed the story as much as I did was Harry using his X-Ray vision to look at Hermione naked.

    Klael: he's vulnerable to magic and the knife was enchanted, apparently. Though he should never have been in the situation where he was bound in the first place, really.

    As for Clark's speed...

    In season 4, when Clark is 17/18, he leaves a football pitch, travels to the locker room, disables someone, then returns to the pitch. No one notices anything. So he ran maybe 800 metres in less time than it takes for the human eye to register movement.

    Harry is 15 at this point, so he's only 2 to 3 years off speeds like that.
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2011
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