Spoken like the true Aryan that you are, Sesc.

I can empathize with what you're saying - really I can. But after the part I quoted first, all I could think was you saying, "And that's why I have at least some respect for the Poles; yeah, we steamrolled them, but unlike those French pussies, at least they *tried* to put up a fight."

<-- is this a good time to break that out?

 

I tried that one for a few chapters and dropped it. Couldn't relate to Harry and I found no character in it I liked. If I remember right Lily ranted about Muggles/Muggleborns in the beginning when she found out she's some wtf pureblood was plain ridiculous.

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I give this a 1.5/5. The bashing is so fucking tiring and the comedy aspect escapes me. If you enjoy cheap cheesy plot devices like some weird middle american president wants to help Harry by offering his superb auror's training in a time field this is the story for you. If you search for an interesting plot, fascinating characters or in general something worth your time, take another road.

It just sucks.

 

I liked it.

3/5

 

Fuck that.

Also, Lily is quite detestable. All it took was her discovering she's actually pureblood for her to suddenly start singing the pureblood tune? Wtf.

 

That was pretty good, but then I enjoy sociopolitical stories. It also avoided the more annoying pitfalls of that genre in HP fanfiction, so far at least, which was very nice to see.

My offering, is a fic I found yesterday.

I honestly don't recommend it, if you don't have high tolerance for the usual independent harry and inta-couple-forever-andever-even-though-were-13 bullshit. It is, quite honestly WTF-worthy at times. However, I walked away feeling like it was the softcore B-movie kind of bad that ends up being enjoyable in a MST3K kind of way. The D/s mechanics, unintentional crack, and some of the characterization choices in this story amused the hell out of me. Someone else might get a kick out of it, too. Being a little drunk, or sleep deprived improves the level of enjoyment.

 

I made it up to the end of Chapter 3.

No. Hell no.

 

Oh, I know. I honestly debated with myself whether or not it might not be better suited to the awesomely bad thread. It's easily one of the worst "Dan and Emma" characterizations I've ever seen in fanfiction, and Dan is easily the worst part of the entire fic, I think.

I ended up skipping much of the interaction with Hermione's parents, to be honest, and only managed to trudge through to the bits that amused me, due to the rarity of D/s HP stories. It's also the only one I've found that actually remembers to consider the use of magic in the BDSM play, even if it's only been a minor point thus far.

 

I didn't check it but at-least the author avoided the cliche that is Dom!HG & Sub!HP.

 

The first lines were enough to put me off....

EDIT: Decided to go for another chapter;

This is the first time he meets Ron in this story, what a psycho!

 

I've been on a H/Hr streak lately, so I should be more open to the idea of Eyes of the Serpent. Unfortunately, the story is horrible. The plot is a horrible blending of cliches and the characterization is just painful to read.

2/5 with me being generous.

 

Everything? Really? Challenge accepted. Paying homage to Papa Hemingway:

There is a lovely story about a boy named Harry Potter, with green eyes and an indomitable spirit, a capricious, occasionally responsible lad who outgrew his austere, humble beginnings, trapped as he was by an unloving aunt and uncle in a tiny cell beneath stairs in an austere, humble abode in patch of austere, post-War British construction, the kind of place as far from magical as one might surmise, a place where a thousand minor tortures go unnoticed… and yet, it was not so for Harry Potter, whose life was indeed magical, for he was a wizard, you see, a thumpin’ good one, once he’d been trained up a bit, as he found one blustery evening in a lonely lighthouse, a lance of black stone jutting up from a frothy sea, when a giant of a man knocked upon the door, an agent of destiny who pulled him from his hungry malaise and thrust upon him the mantle of Hero; Harry was also a Lord, as he would learn upon turning fourteen and ascending to his peerage, an event which granted him influence and authority to defend and take on as vassal his Godfather, one Sirius Black, formerly wanted for accomplice to murder of Harry’s parents and for slaying several non-magical persons, a man with an ominous name and even more austere roots than his liege, a man who would come to guide the boy as he ascended this tiny, yet gifted society, becoming a princeling among his peers (though summering with his aunt, uncle, and Godfather, lest his sensibility be corrupted by privilege, as is so often the case among young Lords), yet with such shedding of childhood affectations and creaky limb-stretching of maturity, Harry became estranged from his less capable chums, Ron, his once best mate, a food-addicted child with a fondness for flatulence humor, dismal sports teams, and using Harry’s other friend, Hermione, as a practice girlfriend (an event which earned him a thumpin' good thumping from Harry and Hermione both) and Ginny, erstwhile little sister and Harpy in training whose unrequited affection he could never (and could never want to) return, being two who took his estrangement particularly badly, lustily cheering for Harry’s demise in the Tri-Wizard tournament, a bloody affair into which he was entered against his will, and in which he nearly lost all in a terrible chain of events involving a giant spider, a Portkey, a graveyard, a flash of silky green light the color of death and butterflies, and the rise, once again, of the Dark Lord, “Blood of the enemy, forcibly taken,” yet was it—for did Harry not say, “I grant you my blood freely,” thus disrupting the ritual, Harry being a plucky young man, one who could duel the monster and flee, clutching the cooling corpse of his friend forever in deathly repose, returning amidst sorrow and chaos, and standing, ultimately, as the sole beacon for the side of the Light in the desperate scrabble for freedom from oppression and evil in the dark days to come— But, alas, this is not that story. This is the story of Moe, a chain-smoking truck driver for Wal*Mart and the painted hooker with black fingernails he banged at a truckstop out by Ridgeway just off of 80. And of all the crazy shit that came after. What a story that was.

 

Can I just say that these scenes in all those damn cliche H/Hr fics crack me the hell up. It's like as soon as Harry gets together with Hermione he never once contemplates just telling Ron that Hermione is actually his girlfriend and instead immediately punches him or whatever. Scenes like this move me straight to that little "x" at the top right.

On the other hand I occasionally continue reading for laughs... and facepalms.

 

Continue reading. You won't be disappointed.

 

Death shall have no dominion has been updated. Kind of an infodump chapter, though.

 

Read this, it was pretty ok. Definitely a bit of a different take on Slytherin!Harry than usual.

I think I saw the other story with all the challenges once and stopped reading after I figured out it sucked (it didn't take very long).

 

Yeah, I was surprised by its relative OKness.

 

I can't fucking stand it when 20 year old men that lived through war are called pup.

I guess it is my pet peeve.

 

This was a surprisingly good story, thanks for reccing it here.

 

What Noxed said. It's pretty good so far.