Si Vis Pacem is a much better take on the premise, even with the recent nosedive.

 

Really? All I recall of is dropping it a few chapters in and while not great this one I at least keep up with. Guess I will give it another try.

 

Si Vis Pacem went full retard when Taylor told daddy about her cape life and then went and joined the Undersiders. There is some good stuff there, but it is more of a guilty pleasure.

I liked Self-Administration better, but consider it a time waster. It doesn't make any egregious mistakes, but isn't particularly interesting either.

Bittersweet is a damn good read if you want to know what it is like to have your soul beaten to a pulp. That shit is depressing.

 

You people are trolling me hard here.

While CleanRag was closer to the truth, both of you are wrong. Si Vis Pacem is fully terrible and the only noticeable thing is how hard it attempts to railroad itself to the plot of Worm. I had to state this now because there was a slight possibility someone might attempt to read Si Vis Pacem based off of what you two said, and that is not allowed.

In other news, I'm debating if I should put in a review of Centipede. It's amazing me how good everything is still is for Taylor, and I'm not sure if I should wait for it to be completed and see how the S9 does nothing important for the story.

In other other news with this edit I just made. I sound so angry, please Worm stop it. Now I have to post something I kinda like in another thread.

 

While I am not interested in fully debating the merits of a story in this thread - let me just say that my post was in response to a recommendation for the story "Self-Administration", which, frankly, is mediocre dreck, like all of the author's stories.

I regard all stories which do not reach a certain minimum baseline with regards to the quality of their prose to be effectively unreadable, regardless of their other potential merits. No matter what you think of the quality of the plotting, characterization, or pacing of Si Vis Pacem, its prose is undeniably much stronger than that of Self-Administration.

Of course, there is a consistent in-universe reason why the plot of Si Vis Pacem took the direction it did. You may or may not find this to be an adequate justification for what at a glance looks like a shallow canon-retread, but it's there.

I am fairly biased when it comes to grading it; it hits a lot of my buttons. I don't think it will appeal to everybody on DLP. I do think it is a better story along most axes than Self-Administration, even ignoring my preferences.

 

Both are equally mediocre. Si Vis whatever has decent prose, depending on your definition of decent, but it's dreadfully dry. Like 80 year old desert pussy. Self Administration has a better character voice. 8 chapters into Si Vis, having skimmed just about as much as I did reading Self Administration, I prefer the latter.

Edit: And Si Vis has horrible dialogue.

 

I hadn't actually seen Si Vis Pacem before, so I figured I'd write a review while I read it.

Si Vis Pacem is several chapters of vicarious wish-fulfillment from the author before it gets extra terrible when this happens.

Terrible, but not surprising. I'm convinced half the authors on spacebattles would suck off Danny just to hear "Thanks, kiddo."

Anyway, after Taylor made herself "smart" the author attempts to write intelligent introspection and dialogue. Protip to the author: Characters don't have to lecture the reader on random off-topic subjects or use "big words" to sound intelligent. It's also really hard to have a character sound intelligent when you're misspelling words.

Like, what the hell is this? I mean, I guess it could be an attempt at world-building, but really? Do we need a run-down of what Taylor thinks of Reaganomics?

Hahahahahaha it's too bad the author doesn't have that power.

Come on, at least let Bill Gates proofread it.

Kind of awkward, but okay. Youngsters, really?

...What? what??

I'd give this a 2/5 in any other fandom, but this is a top tier Worm story. 4/5 in Worm fandom quality stars.

 

Throttle is amusing but also doubt it will be finished. Tried bodyguard but it uses too many tropes I hate, like shitting all over New Wave and Marquis wank.

And after the savage beating Iztiak gave Si Vis Pacem, not going to bother trying that one.

 

Yeah, Bodyguard is terrible.

There is this a sort of Stranger!Taylor. Power seems to be pretty OP, can't tell where it's going yet.

 

Anyone read Grisly? It's a fic where Taylor triggers with Moord Nag's power. It follows a couple of stations of canon, such as the fight with Lung, but also diverges in some interesting ways. It's quite good and worth a read.

 

Not bad for only two chapters. Taylor's power allows her to be selectively invisible like a ghost, can still interact physically like a poltergeist, and can be aware of anywhere ala The Clairvoyant.

Apparently it's based on the powerset of Schroedinger, a Hellsing character I know nothing about.

I'm happy that the scenes so far seem intentionally distant from the stations of canon, and it feels fairly natural. I could see a young Taylor with a stranger power actually behaving like this.

 

Taylor approaches the PRT with her sweet new power to make them aware of Sophia's shenanigans and it doesn't go as smoothly as she expects and they delve into arguing on accountability and probationary wards membership is already on the table, well, where have I seen this before?

In almost all Worm stories is probably not the true answer but it sure fucking feels like that.

Can I say that I am just so, so sick of these types of stories? It's not even the alt power stuff per se but this obsessive compulsion to need to deal with Shadow Stalker and have this by now almost obligatory talk with Piggot about legal stuff in conjunction to that, along with eventual power testing and Ward membership?

And I just know that we will have a scene where Clockblocker, upon seeing/learning about her powers will yell bullshit and then crack a dumb joke and Vista will hit him for it, which will make Taylor giggle, of course. Or it will be Assault and Battery filling in for that, as they do from time to time. I mean, you have to, right? Otherwise your story will be deleted.

Taylor and Piggot clashing on this we have seen so many fucking times, I don't think I would want to read another one of those if my favorite authors teamed up to write one. Say what you will about recurring tropes in other fandoms, such as the "Harry talks real with the Goblins and they understand each other" thing or even the fucking Guiche fight in a more niché fandom, at least you can easily find fanfics without that. You're shit out of luck with that in Worm stories, A lot of the stories have those fucking scenes in it and they rarely differ. At least not meaningfully.

Odds are reasonably good that we'll get the kiddonator as well.

By now all I can assume is that it's pure laziness, an easy way to crank out more words by basically following a blueprint.

I can't wait to find out whether Shadow Stalker will go to juvie or be reassigned to a shit Simurgh/Nilbolg zone.

Maybe I'm being super unfair right now, (not the first time) and the story won't do any of that but this is the impression I got so far.

 

I'm hoping that it goes in a less terrible direction, such as Taylor becoming a hero on her own terms with a fractious relationship with the local PRT. Or even better, I'd like to be surprised by the plot. Joining the Wards would be boring, so I'm pinning my hopes on Taylor and Piggot's antagonism putting the kibosh on that.

 

I'm going to write a Worm fic one day; an X-Men crossover. All OC main cast.

 

I've been reading Queen of the Swarm. It's ok.

 

I'm still waiting for the fix where Taylor triggers with Miss Militia's power and becomes a school shooter tbh.

 

Good find, it is great to see an interesting Stranger ability. Wouldn't call it OP though, she isn't any better than Imp or Nice Guy.

 

Yeah, I'm afraid of exactly that as well. If this goes in the Ward!Taylor direction I am noping out of there. But we are only 2 chapters in, so there is still hope. And most of the other newer Worm fics are pretty cringy.

What I'd like to see in a Worm story would be a different city and the cape scene there. Go Cxjenious.

 

Obviously dark and tragic, but this could make for an interesting extended one shot or multishot. Here's a stab at a way it might go.

Not sure if you'd keep the locker trigger, since it probably wouldn't mesh with the guidelines for a Blaster power. (I believe Miss Miltia is considered to be a Blaster) Probably some Thinker classification also due to Miss Militia's memory recall. Weaverdice trigger event guidelines give Blaster powers as the result of "Man vs. a living/animated threat, ambulatory threat is approaching, attacking from range, or posing immediate harm but still further than arm’s reach."

Possible trigger in accordance with WD guidelines: Locker still occurs, but not the trigger here, though it's the worst incident for Taylor by far. Canon mentions one time that Sophia and others had some jocks chase Taylor: maybe she triggers then when she perceives them as a threat, planning on beating her up or worse? (Edit: She should triggered when she gets cornered at some point; she's looking for a way to defend herself, not strictly escape the situation--the latter befits a Mover, not Blaster, power) She triggers, jocks see a gun suddenly in her hands, and run away from her. She's confused, sees the weapon in her hands, eventually realizes she's a parahuman.

Anyway, I'd suggest giving this power to Taylor with a wrinkle: unlike Miss Militia, she does have a physiological need to sleep. So she has to go to sleep... and recalls the entirety of the bullying campaign up to and past her trigger in perfect detail. Imagine having to relive over 1.5 years of verbal, physical, and emotional abuse over and over every time you go to sleep. Imagine reliving the Locker in perfect detail each sleep cycle.

She tries to ignore it, but re-living the equivalent of 1.5 years of abuse over and over isn't easy to ignore, plus when having to deal with it all over again at school. This also further cements her outwards slowly approaching outright hatred (on the level of retaliating against the bullies). Also, she tries to put sleeping off as long as she can, making her understandably cranky, doing even worse in her classes, her relationship with her father is deteriorating, etc, and the bullies are there screwing things up in general.

Things come to a head when she can't take it anymore and her father can't take Taylor giving him the cold shoulder at home anymore either. Possibly could have the impetus be a version of the mall encounter. A version of the principal meeting happens in school, where again, Taylor feels she's being brushed off, none of her demands are met. (Like in canon, Blackwell does try to offer some form of punishment for the trio, but it isn't the sort that Taylor wants) Emma, Sophia, etc are smug about it and Taylor is utterly enraged at this point.

She's not caping, so she doesn't have that as an outlet. Also, the constant bullying she relives in her dreams combined with the failure of the Blackwell encounter push her over the edge. She plans things out and carries out the shooting the week after. Kills Gladly, Blackwell on the off chance, some other random students (bystanders who did nothing to help her in her eyes), etc.

Kills Madison fairly quickly, but gets into a scuffle with Sophia, who uses her powers. Sophia almost kills Taylor but Taylor is able to generate a taser when cycling through various weapons that don't harm Sophia. Sophia is incapacitated and Taylor finishes her off with a bullet to the brain.

Comes across Emma at the very end, who's hiding and scared out of her mind. Taylor asks Emma why she did it, Emma tries to come up with some excuse before blurting out some version of the truth, telling her the story about the alley and what not. Taylor considers it, coldly informs Emma that she doesn't care about her excuses, and executes her.

Police and PRT (since Sophia is at the school) show up outside. End story with Taylor going out to commit suicide by cop, closing just as she opens the door leading outside.

... shit, I kind of want to write this now.

EDIT:

Stylistically, I think the most effective way to do this would be partially anacrhonistically. Start the story out with Taylor beginning and carrying out the school shooting.

Intersperse between shooting segments the backstory: some encounters with the bullies, her trigger, dreams constantly of the bullies + abuse in perfect detail (imagine reliving the Locker in full stereoscopic detail every time you go to sleep), worsening home / school life, failed caping attempt, mall encounter, failed disciplinary meeting, etc.

The breaks should occur at logical points: e.g. when Taylor's about to kill Blackwell, you could weave in the disciplinary meeting, finish that, and then return to Taylor killing Blackwell. Don't necessarily have to use that precise pattern, but I figure it would help to relate what's occurring in the shooting to aspects of what precipitated it.

I think it'd create a certain "inevitable" feel to the tragedy of the story and would probably work as a good framing device to retain reader attention and ensure progression throughout the story.

 

Rayndeon : Is there a reason as to why she wouldn't be caping? Seems to me that in that situation, she would plunge into trying to become a hero way faster and hastier and it would lead to escalation on that end because she ends up killing someone during that.

Also, while I understand why she would relieve her torment every time she sleeps on a story telling level - to give her the psychological strain and push to eventually snap - I don't really see why her powers would do that. I can't remember anyone's power fucking them over for so little gain like that. Even Labyrinth and Burnscar get something for the immense drawbacks of their powers, what does Taylor gain for basically getting tortured every time she sleeps?

I don't think it's necessary and it seems pointlessly cruel. Maybe not sleeping would do the same thing anyway, if only to a lesser degree? Not being able to sleep and not being able to do much at that time, having no Internet and all, her thoughts wander to her current situation and that, for months, never being able to escape her awareness of her situation of being in a horrible place...yeah,think that would do the trick as well.

All that said, surprisingly enough, not sure how much i like the idea. Think it would depend a lot on the tone when writing this.

Also, Miss Militia can make nukes, right? Doesn't bode well for the population of Brockton Bay. I could see someone pushed to the brink like that maybe wanting to remove the school altogether.