So you're sitting there in your study, crystal wine decanter filled with Lillet aged a century and set of Havanna cigars within reach...

Yet you don't touch them.

The truth is...

...You can't. ​

Not while you're thinking: "Why are my FFNet summaries not up to par?"

That's where I come in.

I'm the best in the business when it comes to touching up summaries. I can make a summary that's a mere 6 into a perfect 10 in the blink of an eye.

I'll concoct a summary that will mislead even the most wily reader into clicking on The Office, thinking it's a Pulitzer Prize recipient.

I'll make your boy summary look like a girl summary.

All I need? Your summary in its current form. And the story has to be yours.

I will meet your needs.

Strictly Harry Potter and Calvin & Hobbes.

This is a limited liability company. I bear no responsibility for results divergent with expectations and will offshore the profits at the slightest scent of legal trouble.

 

Does it have to be Harry Potter?

Edit: Right, I'm blind. Totally missed that. All I'm currently writing is an original fic. It's science fiction, but dunno if that counts or not.

 

It can also be Calvin and Hobbes.
And Attack on Titan.
Phillip K. Dick.
Halo.
Call of Duty.
Robert Ludlum.
Ian Fleming
Lord of the Rings.
Final Fantasy (7 through 10)
Pokemon
Star Wars
Fallout
Spiderman/Batman/Superman
Mass Effect

Edit: Sure man, I'm pretty good at those too.

 

I'm waiting.

 

Don't see any request from Giovanni.

 

I could use the help. My summaries are okay, but I haven't really touched them since I Made them.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6728900/1/Far-Too-Many-Time-Travelers
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3516406/1/The-Ten-Plagues
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6343543/1/Harry-the-Mysterious-Curse-of-the-GirlWhoLived

 

Cheddar, Jeram, rest easy. I've got you.

 

Isn't this the exact reason not to rest easy?

Besides, all you need to do to get more interest in your story (at least, in my experience) is put something about Fleur in the summary.

 

Lets test this...

Bitten by AznFlyingKitty ...Was there any particular reason why no one bothered to tell Harry Potter that the Dark Lord Voldemort was a gay vampire intent on ravishing the Boy-Who-Lived? LVHP

becomes

Bitten by AznFlyingKitty ...Was there any particular reason why no one bothered to tell Harry Potter that the Dark Lord Voldemort was a gay vampire intent on ravishing the Boy-Who-Lived? Can Fleur same him from a fate worse than death?

I dunno, I still feel absolutely NO inclination to read the story.

 

You might not, but just wait till the bazillion fangirls squee while reading that

 

Summarize me now or lose me forever.

 

Responded to Rymrock, Jeram and Cheddar.

Not perfect yet, but I thought not mentioning Colin explicitly gives it a more involving feel. The original however was already very good.

However, I had little luck with Time Travelers. Anyone have suggestions?

That's already one of the most epic summaries I've ever seen, Lamora, as befitting the story. But if you were to really be damn critical, the first part is the relatively less epic part. I'll think on this one.

 

Interesting company with interesting results. I need to see more of this magic being worked.
The service still running?

I've always been dissatisfied with the summaries I had for these two one-shots, more than with other summaries I wrote:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9093619/1/The-Eye-for-an-Eye
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9093528/1/The-Last-Enemy-to-be-Destroyed

Compared to their relative appeal, the summaries are really sub-par.

Thanks in advance.

 

Story Title: The Ticking Clock

Current Summary: What can you do when your time’s running out? Whatever you want.

Basic Plot: Snape gets poisoned, has 7 days to live and decides to spend them killing Death Eaters/assorted Voldemort followers.

 

Just found this thread. Is is still alive? If yes, I could totally use a second opinion on this:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9796150/1/Lesser-Evils

Premise: Harry embraces his darker side and goes seriously Krieg on Voldemort. Features partly OOC Sirius and Ginny.

I feel it needs to be mentioned that Crouch is still alive so I don't have to deal with people sharing their extensive canon knowledge with me, pointing out my glaring mistake. I want it to be sharp and to the point. I think my summary sounds at least okay, but someone else may always suggest tweaks here and there.

Also, I'm pimping out a complete one shot posted here on DLP before it goes on FFnet and I can't nail a summary for it. It's basically a piece for me to show off an awesome!kickass!Harry. Providing a link since it seems to be a practice in here.

https://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=25555

Basically, I want it to a bit on the humorous side, foreshadow the adventure within. Can't get it right. Story is 'Harry time-travels and roflstomps Voldemort with foreknowledge'. People in the thread mentioned it was similar to Unforgiving Minute, which I have since checked out. My fic is much shorter and not nearly as serious, with a more Marauder flavor. Here's what I have at the moment:

"They say the best revenge is living well. Harry Potter will find out how much truth is in that statement. As soon as he's done with Lord Voldemort."

It can't help but feel it blows.