Yarrr, this be my one actual performance of duty for about...the next year or so. Have fun, kiddies. I'm going back to my corner and my doughnuts.

 

Well, one cliche that I absolutely hate is just how much better EVERYONE in the "Marauders" Era is represented than when the books are taking place, and the fact that it is called a fucking Era. There is no point for that. Sure, there are always exceptional wizards, but not EVERYONE is that good. And it aint an era, period. Its just a time when James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Snape, Lily, etc. went to school for seven years, nothing more.

 

Speaking of the Marauders... does it ever say in the books that everyone else called them 'Marauders?' I always figured that it was just a nickname they came up with for their own little group. Just because they had a name for themselves doesn't mean they were necessarily popular, and it definitely doesn't mean that everyone else called them that...

Also on that topic... I hate when Harry or the twins inherit any sort of book from the Marauders... just gets on my nerves. I mean... really, what is the point?

 

Filler...its so that halfwit authors can add somehting 'fun' to their craven excuses for a story.

Any Marauder-related stuff in an HP fic which is set in the 90's is entirely useless. There's no reason for it, and all it does is provide some way to make the story longer while the twit of an author tries to dream up new 'cool' things.

 

Good point, I thought the whole Mauraders thing was supposed to be a secret. If everyone knows they're the Mauraders they know who's been doing the pranking.

About Maurader names, almost every fic where Harry becomes an animagus he has to have a Maurader name (given to him by Remus of course). A name no one ever refers to him with afterwards.

 

Well, what would be the point of telling people about a name that is an obvious link to an animagus form? In almost every fic Harry is also an unregistered animagus. Might just be a bit of intelligence showing it's way though a cliche fic. Of course, that's ignoring the fact that doing so was completely pointless in the first place...

hm. I'd mention a cliche here, but I'm of the opinion that they have all been said already. (*wonders if posting with so little sleep is a good idea*)

 

They include it because they can have Harry as some really cool animal, like phoenix, or a dragon, or some north american cat of some sort that is only found in america, but the authors loves them so harry has to be one.

One reason you rarely see them used, is that authors abandon their fics before they get to a point where the form would be useful, like fighting Voldie or something.

A cliche just about everyone, including a lot of people here are guilty of using, is this idea of an Inner Circle of Death Eaters. It isn;t mentioned anywhere in the books, that Voldie has anymore death eaters than those that appeared around him in the graveyard, and however many he has managed to recruit since. Certainly not enough to have an Inner Circle that report to him, and an army of lesser recruits. And to me, the idea of an Inner Circle isn't even that cool.

 

One thing that grates my nerves is sirius-sex-god, he is a prankster, not a harem builder.
Also in Founders "era", i get pissed because EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME GODRIC FUCKING GRYFFINDOR SUGGESTS CALLING THE SCHOOL:"Godric's School of witchcraft adn wizardry" only to be refuted by Helga Huffplefull suggesting hogwars! If i see it one more time i'm gonna murder someone...

 

then go off and murder somebody, I can promise you, you will see it again unless you give up fanfiction all together. Then JKR wil porbably tunr book 7 in a million word epic, that includes time travel.

 

One cliche that really gets on my nerves, is that in every "Marauder's Era" fic that I've read, James gets paired with Lily, and Sirius gets paired with Lily's best friend.

 

I have never read a fic where GG wants to call the school Godric Gryffindor's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

I'm getting really sick of ever Tonks character having the vocabulary of a 3 year old. She seems to always say "wotcher [insert name here]." Sure, she used a different word in cannon than 'hello' or 'nice to meet you' but do you have to have that be the only thing she can think of saying when she first sees someone?

 

In abused Harry fics when he details everything he went through to the first person that listens, wouldn't that be the sort of thing you keep to youself.

Gun wielding Harry has already been mentioned but I would like to add Marksman!Harry as a subcliche, how dose a kid who has never touched a gun in his life take out five deatheaters at 20 yards with his uncle's snubnose.

Not really a cliche but when authors who rewrite the series try to compensate for not having any original ideas by making events that happen latter on in the series happen in the first book, Sirius, The Sword of Gryffindor...etc.

 

He uses the force...

 

^Why of course how could I have forgotten.

Anothe cliche that I remebered is that in Vampire!Harry fics written by fangirls harry rarely (never) drinks the blood of another person, since the author stills wants harry to be a vampire, he is fed chicken blood that for some reason is always procured by Remus.

Lets not forget that house elves have the knowledge to create a room of requirements for the trunk that Harry bought in Diagon alley.

On a parting note, Harry some how gets a glove, ring, whatever that vastly increases the power of his spells.

 

Vamp!Harry:

Because not walking in sunlight is awfully inconvenient to write, and is a major turnoff for Harry's potential gay buddies (Harry and Draco must fall into each other's arms while running in a field of flowers and make passionate buttsex!), The author downgrades Harry's vampirism so sunlight only causes a minor itch.

 

Harry as an Phoenix Animagus. JKR herself confirmed that your personality=your form. Not once in HP has Harry shown the qualities that make him a Phoenix, and what he does has is shared by 30+ other animals in the animal kingdom.

Oh, and authors afraid of hurting/maiming/killing main characters. Yes, it sucks when one of your personal faves dies (I felt real sad when Shacklebolt bit the big one in "To Fight The Coming Darkness"), but at least the author has the balls to procede with the plot and be realistic. In no war does one side lose 0 people, so HP-verse should be no exception.

 

Magical Animagus = Not since Merilin = Hax Pwrz.
Harry suddenly knows his way around Knockturn to find another Wand Dealer. Which is amazing, a fifteen or sixteen year old boy finding an secret illegal business with ease.

 

And what about the good old cliche of Harry feeling a "pull" towards his ultimate "Wand of PWNZOR5 +19"? It has to be one of the worst ways for Harry to get his newer and "better" wand.

 

On that topic, secret and special wand makers, only serving a select clientele (which, of course, Harry makes himself part of by saying something stupid to someone), who produce wands individually by having the customer choose each part by 'feeling' what is most attuned to him with Harry having several woods, cores and gem stones, resulting in The Wand Of Doom And Other General Unpleasentries For His Enemies...