-I hate it when Harry becomes the heir to basically every single magical son of a bitch to ever grace a history book.

- When he places Hermione (Ginny,Dumbles, Snape, *vomits* Draco etc) on a pedestal so high it's can't be measured in light-friggin-years.

- When the phrase "Any guy would be lucky to have you" come outa his mouth. I mean, how much more obvious can you get? It's almost as pathetic as those stupid bollywood movies in which sex is depicted as couples diving behind green bushes which then begin to shake!

-I hate those in which he falls 'madly in love.'

-I frankly hate most of the Independent Harry genre. While I do agree he needs to grow a backbone, most of those stories show no progress from the frankly foolish boy from fifth book, who couldn’t even think clearly when faced with (what he thought) was the life of a ‘beloved godfather’ - to a mastermind, who can outwit, out-duel, out-think, out-last in any (almost any) field, the rest of the wizarding world. It is not the idea of a panicky-Harry that bits me, but the notion that he can out grow those urges and meta-morph into a swashbuckling, breast-beating, calculating asshole in a matter of weeks.

-I despise those in which he is shown to have no fuckin Ego and Pride. He’s friggin idolized by half the assholes in U.K and despised by the rest. This does build up a bit of self-importance, ESPECIALLY in child who’s got no parental figure to moderate his exposure. And self-importance is not a bad thing. It would have, at least, stopped him from chasing after his moronic best-FRIEND’S sister (someone whom he considered a past basically) and rescuing her like some stupid knight out of a shitty 2-D movie. Hell, I love my friend, but if his sis was in danger of being killed by a fuck-long Basilisk being controlled by a son-of-a-bitch who didn’t care about killing little-friggin children to archive his perverted goals, I’d rather piss in my pants than put a foot near that entrance.
There is a big difference between bravery and stupidity from a first person perspective but from a third person point of view they can be, often, misread.

-Hate: Sex god with a 20-foot pole harder than the 100-karet diamond he should stuff up Ginny’s ass before sodomizing her to death.

 

I hate cliche of Harry the amazing cook. For gods sake the only thing he do is frying eggs with bacon and making cofee.

 

I hate when Hermione lectures Harry. I mean without Harry, she would be dead or a fucking loner sucking dicks for some recognition.

 

Well I for one am tired of all these Vampire Harry fic's that have him hook up Draco .

I would like to see a Vamp Harry fic where he has a harem of witches at his beck & call.

The way it should be for a Male vampire.

 

I got one.

Harry goes to Privet Drive for the summer. The Dursley’s make him do gardening all day while continuing their starvation regime. Harry decides to stop being a little bitch and does sit ups and push ups at night.

Within three weeks Harry is the buffest dude around, having gained 30 kgs of muscle and has a perfectly defined and proportioned body.

Usually written by horny little fan bitches who use it to get off at night.

 

No no those are the ones that write slash. You are talking about the ones that never actually worked out in their life.

 

I have one. How bout the cliche where if the dursleys are insulting (Tonks/Herm/Gin/Fleur/FemBlaise.etc.) Harry suddenly says to vernon something like " I'll kill you if you ever insult her again. Harry shouldn't say that if the witch in question is of age and can curse the muggle to pluto. Whats harry gonna do throw shoes at them? You should have evidence of harry rebelling against the dursleys brfore you even think about doing a scene like that.

 

There is one line in any fan fiction that I hate beyond all others. "Your short life", or any variation there of. I really, really, really hate that line. Especially if it in spoken dialogue. He's 16 for fuck's sake! At one time it was with a lot of luck that you lived past 30 years old. All in all, spoken or thought, that line annoys the hell out of me.

 

Something that has become horribly, horribly overdone - the letters from the now-deceased James&Lily Potter in his vault that say 1) you should be reading this at 11 2) having grown up with Sirius if anything happened to us 3) because we made Peter our Secret Keeper 4) you inherit more money that you can probably count because we're richer than the Malfoy's 5) speaking of the Malfoy's, they're Dark - don't trust them.

and the thing that I now hate to see in any sort of fic especially in a letter from the dead parents is 6) You'll need to find a wife soon, and she needs to be a redhead 7) because of a Potter tradition for marrying redheads 8 ) because only a redhead has a temper fiery enough to manage us. (this would be the place for the smiley bashing it's head against a brick wall.)

Imagine the longer version of this condensed rant - Lily Potter being a redhead does NOT a family tradition make. Generation on generation of marrying redheads would eventually give redheaded Potters. There is no hereditary curse to make Harry need to marry Ginny - who can't be the only redheaded female Harry will ever meet. If you want him paired with Ginny (and after HBP, why would you do that?), have it be because Harry likes Ginny, not because he has to find a redhead - any redhead. There will be other redheaded witches. Or pick Nymphadora Tonks who can have any color hair she wants, from pink to blue to black to white to any shade of red she pleases. or maybe he should just marry a squib or muggle, which I'm sure also come with red hair.

Another annoying cliche (sorry, when I try to put in the accent, my computer refuses) Harry gets a magical (and venomous) snake. This snake serves only one purpose: to give the author-in-the-Harry-suit the chance to claim that Parseltongue is just a language, and speaking a language doesn't make him or anyone else evil. Maybe the author also uses the snake to scare Draco or Snape. The horribly rare, dangerous magical snake that was glowingly described in the initial scene is then forgotten, with the only possible reappearance a tragic death scene that will either send Harry into tears (and needing consoled by the romance interest - usually Ginny or Draco (insert vomiting icon here) ) or into a violent rage.

 

I don't know if someone said this but i got one.

I hate it when Harry travels to lotr world and basically gets it on with a freakin elf or that knight guy or even the fucking drawf. Every lotr crossover fic i looked over or read has slash where Harry gets it on with one of those guys. I only saw couple of fics where he isn't gay. There killing the world of fantasy.

And whats more, i read this story, you guys might have known of, he is a vampire, over hundred or something years old and the fucking guy's personality is the same as he was in 5th. The guy practically making a sea of tears because Hermbitch is old and is going to die soon. I mean, i would understand that if a friend is going to die, as a man, he would be there for him and not cry like a little sissy but nooooo, the stupid fan girl author has to make him look like a fucking sissy with no mental growth whatso ever. The guy has no backbone. Hell, even longbottom has more manly shitck them this idiot.

There, i want to go on more, but i think i'm done with the rant.