'the fuck's a Ted?

 

This. Actually pretty damn funny.

 

The start was, the middle and towards the end were boring as piss.

 

That's because Mark Wahlberg was less of an asshole starting near the middle and towards the end.

 

If you found this "horrible" I'm curious as to what the hell it is you like to watch.

 

On my second viewing I liked the movie even more. Much more. Almost every scene which had Bane was awesome. His dialogues were beyond awesome.

The only problem I have is why were Talia and Bane on a suicide mission? It makes no sense. Someone should be there to lead the League of Shadows. And Bane is the League of Shadows. (The way he says it during the first Bat-Bane fistfight is bad-ass.)

Also, I am curious. Does anyone guard the pit from outside? If they do, the League probably killed them when they went to rescue Bane. (Right?) If so, there must be someone (outside the pit) who has a loved one inside it, who is stopping them from trying to go to the mouth and throwing a rope down? Maybe this is a question comic-book readers can answer?

 

Personally, I wouldn't call it horrible. I'd call it an overload of characters and ideas that had little reason to come together in the finale of an epic saga. The nod to Robin, Talia Al Ghul suddenly showing up and revealing herself as the woman behind Bane, the nuke, the League of Shadows suddenly losing it's shit and deciding to kill Batman over Ras al Ghul's death, Catwoman, etc...

It was still interesting and enjoyable. It's still not what it could have been, and remains the weakest of the trilogy. Guess even Nolan can't beat that curse.

 

Not really. This prison is very different from the one Bane was raised by in the comics. That one was called Peña Duro, and was located in a fictional Latin American country called Santa Prisca.

This prison is supposed to be metaphorical Lazarus Pit. I don't think there's supposed to be any guards there at all. The point is that if you somehow manage to get yourself out, you deserve freedom.

As for outside loved ones, I dunno. Could be a social thing -- like they're viewed as Untouchables not worthy to help, so no guards are even needed. Or maybe the prison is kept secret. Or it could be that no one in there has any loved ones.

 

In that genre? The other two Batman movies, Avengers and Iron Man. I like nearly every action movie as long as he is a bit believable.
I just find that this film has to many plotholes(For example the rope in the prison) and ignores realism(The frontal storming of the city hall plus the following brawl) too often.
I am also not American and didn´t grow up with the comics so that could influence me as well.

 

You're trying to apply believability to a superhero movie? Like openng a dimensional rift between universes to supply Loki with an alien army to conquor earth?

I suppose if you can take certain fictional realities as gospel then you're left with analyzing the logic of the story. Specifically a superhero story, even more as Dark Knight Rises is the end of a trilogy.

The rope in the prison is not only what is keeping Bruce from escaping but the mental barrier that stops him from making the climb is the same that keeps him from beating Bane. Sure there is a ton more to it than that but in the end it is same type of metaphor and allusion commonly used by Nolan in most of his films (including his first two Batman movies).

As for the storming of city hall... Well sure, it was a bit melodramatic and cheesy but it is near the same amount of awesome and epic as the The Dark Knight on the fairies. The story of people doing right when pushed to the limit. Hell, they were at least cops who reacted with force to evil. In Spiderman the bystanders of New York threw shit at the Green Goblin, the cops never did jack.

 

The thing is that I bought the idea behind the Avengers and even the dimensional rift but not what happened in Batman.
And yeah I need some logic in my movies... for example I can buy the idea of Thor being a god etc and have superpowers, hell I can even buy the idea behind Captain America but what I can´t buy is that Bane can suddenly destroy the wall with a punch when he never before showed superhuman strength or that The Bat can destroy the tanks but fires endlessly on the Truck, or the speed of the rockets etc.

 

Not really, no. The only thing that keeps him from beating Bane is the fact that Bane had a gas mask pumping painkillers into his system and as such was a much calmer, more collected fighter. When he loses this, he goes feral and tactics go out the window.

 

Spoiler

Yes, that is technically correct. That is how he beats him in the straight fight but if you really read my post you also read there is more to it. When Bane broke the bat, he broke him more than just physically. It's half the scenes while he's in the pit, him rehabilitating his body and soul. Gaining a sense of fear. Not a fear of death for deaths sake, but dying before he could save the city. Which is how he ended up making the climb with no rope and making it out. Explaining a metaphor really takes away from the metaphor, much like a joke.

 

I saw this movie a second time over the weekend as well (it was either that or Total Recall, bleh) and Bane was just awesome every second of the movie that he appeared in.

I especially like that

Spoiler

he tries to shoot Batman in the head with a shotgun instead of following Talia's orders and letting him die in the nuclear blast.

He just came off as a sort of super-competent villain right up until the end when you realize he had no exit strategy. That still bugs the shit out of me. I could see him sacrificing himself to complete the mission but not to simply plan on dying for no damn reason.

 

Spoiler

No, I totally get that according to some prison version of Obi Wan Bruce had to get some fear to motivate him to escape the prison, I just don't think that it played any part in his fight with Bane. He wasn't spectacularly better the second time, in fact he should have been worse, having been in that prison for so long. He just left with a vital piece of information he didn't have before. And quite frankly, Bruce doesn't need that guy to sufficiently motivate him when it comes to saving Gotham.

Nor does it necessarily follow that that adrenaline boost you get from guaranteed death in the pit wasn't something he got when he faced enemies anyway. It's just that in that particular case it was hampered by the rope, he knew that he wasn't going to die.

At best, I can say that I see that being afraid made him more wary and not as like to throw everything in, like Bane did when he started to freak out (which seems like the opposite of what people -and the movie-are claiming), but I prefer the simpler explanation; once bitten twice shy.


The whole idea seems suspect to me.

 

Spoiler

Ok I guess I need to seperate Batman defeating Bane and the specific fight itself. No- gaining that specific knowledge isn't what leads to him being physically capapble to win a bout of fist to cuffs.

 

Spoiler

Yeah, I just didn't see the two fights as that different. In one Bane was calm and cool and so was able to counter despite Bruce getting his knocks in. In another he started to panic the minute Bruce went for his mask, in fact, that's where I think the fear of dying giving one strength actually makes sense.

The whole metaphor makes sense for the pit, stretching it makes holes appear.

 

How The Dark Knight Rises Should Have Ended.

Funny and obviously spoilers.

 

The funny thing is that Nolan and Bale's lasting gift to the Batman film franchise is the impression that Batman has throat cancer.