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Complete Betrayed by Kateydidnt - K+ - HP/OC - 26 Chapters

Discussion in 'General Fics' started by Antivash, Jul 23, 2005.

  1. Assassinator_of_Dumbledor

    Assassinator_of_Dumbledor Raptured to Hell

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Messages:
    99
    Location:
    hell
    It was a good read but not something that I would reread 3.5/6
     
  2. Ikaros Mephisto

    Ikaros Mephisto First Year

    Joined:
    May 23, 2008
    Messages:
    23
    Location:
    Sweden

    An Azkaban story, this should be interesting. ​

    The frame job is somewhat believable, though clumsy. The idea that they wouldn’t still be asking questions or that Dumbledore would be that firm in Harry’s guilt doesn’t sit right with me. The non-use of truth potions is too much a cop out. It’s unbelievable. But I’ll suspend that particular disbelief for now.​

    The switching between points of view is disorienting especially since there is not clear indicator of when one ends and another begins. The format could use some work at least from what I can see in the early chapters. ​

    I’m not really a fan of flashbacks so I’ll just skip those entirely. The conversations are strained at best and come of quite flat. ​

    Ah, I find myself recognizing this story now. I’ve read it before. I barely tolerated it. Leaving the Wizarding World behind is quite understandable, but the non-use of magic is not quite believable. I see the connection between the world that tossed him aside and magic, but still. ​

    The story of his muggle life is boring, tedious and somewhat confusing. This isn’t really an Azkaban!Harry story at all. It’s starts off that way, but this is more akin to muggle!Harry than anything else or even nextgenereation!Harry. By the fourth chapter I’m so bored it’s not even funny. I don’t want to read about muggle life, I read fanfiction to get away from it. ​

    I can already see where this is going, somehow this story will feature Harry’s daughter more than him. And then over time it will ensnare him back to the Wizarding World and more than likely someone will die in order to propel Harry into it, likely his wife. It’s awfully tedious. I can see why some people might like this sort of thing. I don’t get my jollies from how real a story is, but how believable it is within the confines of the story world. This is realistic and boring. ​

    2.7/5 Solid writing, but tedious and certainly not my cup of tea. I personally couldn’t continue reading after the fourth chapter. I don't know who to recomend this story to or even if I should at all.


     
  3. Verminard

    Verminard Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2007
    Messages:
    280
    I liked it. But one thing I noticed about this and other Azkaban stories is that their timelines have Harry locked away for years while Voldemort carries out his war. I think it was more than ten years in this one, and a few others.

    Voldemort was nearly triumphant when Harry stopped him as a baby, I dont think it would take him another 10 or 12 years - or even 5 to take over.
     
  4. pontfirebird73

    pontfirebird73 Third Year

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2006
    Messages:
    97
    Location:
    New Jersey
    This story is OLD but good.
     
  5. mumihp

    mumihp First Year

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2008
    Messages:
    41
    This story was my first Azkaban Harry fic. This got me into the whole Harry in Azkaban genre. Thought it was a bit angsty for my taste, nevertheless, it was a very good read. 3.75/5.
     
  6. FollowTheReaper

    FollowTheReaper Professor

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2008
    Messages:
    402
    Location:
    Finland
    What I find sad about azkaban!Harry, is that the possibilities are endless, but sadly, most of the time it goes like this: If you have read one, you have read them all...
    Original concepts are few and far between, but cliches fester like a bad case of yeast infection