Title: Black and Blue
Author: Ricoch3t
Rating: M
Genre: Adventure
DLP Category: The Alternates
Pairing: Main characters listed as Harry and Fleur
Status: Work in Progress
Summary: Without the scar Harry Potter has had a hard life. A mysterious recluse despite the fact that he is attending Hogwarts, he lives in the dungeons' shadows. But all of that's about to change as the Tri Wizard Tournament comes to Hogwarts... AU. 5th Year
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4036935/1/Black_and_Blue

For further reference, when added a new fic I should first check the following two links to see if it has already been discussed?

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=5990
http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=2803

 

Went alright til it reached that 'Chi' shit.

2/5

 

This was so full of fail and at the same time so very awesome. I tried to overlook the awful parts — Smoking!Harry, Tattooed!Harry, Pierced!Harry, Gruff!Loner!Hawt!Harry. I managed, until it derailed somewhere around chapter nine.

Malfoy’s iPod was bad, the fascination with cigarette brands was worse. There’s a gem buried here — buried in shit. I don’t have the stomach to keep digging. 3/5

 

One word: Failure

I could only get until that.

It inmediately amde me think this was a story about Snape poking Harry in the bunghole.

"I own you" :shudders:

Imagine my surprise while looking at the author's profile, seeing that most of her favorite fics are SSHP.

 

Malfoy... iPod?

Fail

 

And this, boys and girls, is where the bandwagon begins.

 

To be fair, the use of private companies are usually fail. In a story, you should say 'computer' not 'mac ox with four cores and a generator'. Or, in this case, he listened to music, not to iPod nano 30gig

 

This story is so all over the place, for every piece of this story i do like it's accompanied by about another 3 that just leave me questioning why i'm reading this at all.
2.5/5

 

Fuck off Tehan, anyone having an iPod in 1995/6 is auto fail, never mind it was Malfoy.

Edit: or that fact they are at Hogwarts and He's a fucking Pureblood.

 

I realise that an iPod at Hogwarts is stupid. So did Cy Block. Who had already said all that needs to be said on the topic. You adding the single word 'fail' to the discussion is utterly pointless. Well, except for the part where your balls feel big because you and fifty other nitwits all badmouthed some random shit story on the internet, right?

So you fuck off, and next time you feel like jumping in with a me-too vote, at least try to contribute something to the discussion.

 

It really says volumes when the story can't reach the Harry/Fleur quickly enough and Fleur's entrance is only on the third chapter.

funkytoad, what aspect did you like? Because I doubt I'd find anything remotely of redeeming value even if I took a magnifying lense to it. It's funny how the author tried to make Harry cool, ala Fettucini, but then writes that he's Snape's bitch.

To answer your question, neither of those threads have been updated in recent memory. Use the search function.

 

Oh, look at those pretty tags at the bottom of both lists.

Handy, aren't they?

 

It's about time.

 

And this, boys and girls, is where the trolling begins. Lincos took the bait, unfortunately.

Oh irony. What's funny is that this won't be the last time you come down on someone without contributing to the discussion yourself.

On topic: the story truly was weak. The prologue didn't have the feel of a prologue at all - it might as well have been chapter 1. Dialogue was sparse, description was sparse...all in all, it felt like the author was writing for her one or two select friends who would be reading it and giggling together, imagining the rest of the details in their head. At least there were no self-inserts of exchange students from America, though I didn't get past chapter two:

As Lincos said:

 

I read the first 3-4 chapters of this story several months ago and thought it had a lot of promise. Now I've read to Chapter 11 and cannot continue.

I like Harry, and I like Fleur; however, the plot sucks so much that Harry and Fleur can't save the story.

1 star.

 

Perhaps I should have taken a quote that demonstrated what Nob, Cy and Mofo had already told us - the story was horribly flawed?

Wait, never mind, you just did that for me. And what a huge contribution it was, too. I now know that you consider it to be... fail. Oh, you me-too'd? What was that about irony?

Puzzling thing is, why are you swooping in to play Tarzan to Lincos' Jane?

 

Me too, me too.

 

My, haven't we had some interesting submissions the last few days...
Oh well, 'least this one isn't a Megaman crossover.

I wasn't able to read terribly far into this one, so I'll refrain from rating. If I had to though, I'd give it...

2/5

 

This is on my alert list but I guess lots of people don't like it. The first few chapters were very readable but the last few starting with the whole 'Chi' idea has been getting harder to read.

There are plenty of things mentioned that just shouldn't be in Hogwarts without an explanation, ipods among them.

Hmm... 7/10 if it continues and gets better.

2/5 if it doesn't. It's an okay fic really so far, and while not new it has an interesting side. It needs to be edited a little though.

 

Tehan: there's a difference between jumping on the bandwagon and agreeing with someone. Justblaise backed up his rating with a fairly detailed review.

As for Lincos, well... I'm still not sure whether or not he read the story before posting, although Malfoy having an iPod *does* sound like a nice bit of failure. But wait, is it just Malfoy having an iPod, or Malfoy finding an iPod (let's forget it happens in 95/96 for a while) and thinking it's a cool magic trick, showing it off and bragging about it -- until Hogwarts' magic screws it up or he learns it's a Muggle device?

First option = fail.

Second option = a stupid, ridiculed Malfoy = potential for win.

I doubt the author picked the 2nd option, but just saying... You don't know what an author can make of an idea. Try not to say 'fail' unless you've read the fic. (Well at least you didn't rate it.)

And Andromalius: I don't know if you've heard, but additional mods have been hired because the staff couldn't do all the work!