WIP Blue Moon by The Carnivorous Muffin - Twilight - M

someone010101 · Aug 31, 2020

Title: Blue Moon
Author: The Carnivorous Muffin
Rating: M
Genre: Humor/ Romance
Status: WIP
Library Category: Other Fandoms
Pairings: Bella/ Carlisle
Summary: In some other universe, Edward was a little more insistent about that "you can just sleep with Jacob" plan that he proposed to Bella inside a tent. Replace Jacob with Carlisle, insert Carlisle's need to fix the dumpster fire that is his son's relationship, and add in a dash of upset Bella and terrible things ensue.
Link: fanfiction.net, Ao3

This is basically a comedy, maybe it'll grow into something else later. A ridiculous premise played completely straight: Edward has the bright idea that, since Bella really wants sex before marriage, and he'd kill her, she should just sleep with Carlisle! It'll be great, problem solved!

It's a gloriously entertaining trainwreck of second hand embarrassment and cringe. Edward, Bella, Carlisle, Esme and even minor secondary characters like Bellas father get a character and come alive in ways I'm totally not used to from Twilight. Which makes the contrast between Carlisles somber introspection, merry wedding preparations, the absurdity of it all, people being completely oblivious to it or pretending very hard even better.

"I can't have sex with Bella," Edward said slowly, "However, if anyone can, it's you."

Yes, that's what Carlisle thought he'd said the first time.

In the background, the clock ticking on the wall was practically deafening.

"Does Bella know you're asking me this?" Carlisle asked slowly.

"No," Edward said, "No, I wanted to ask you first. If you agree, I'll tell her, I'll talk to her and—"

"Edward," Carlisle interrupted, feeling a pit of dread growing inside his stomach, "I cannot sleep with your fiancée."

[...]

And if she stormed out and slammed the door in his face at least it'd get her and Edward talking.

And that was how Carlisle started down the path to Hell.

[...]
[...]

The hour and a half, apparently, had been spent with Bella giving herself a makeover.

… That probably meant that she and Edward hadn't spent any of it talking.
Click to expand...

Ched · Sep 1, 2020

I’ve been reading this.

I don’t know if it’s library worthy or not but it’s amusing and easy to read and complete fuckery.

In terms of the actual writing it’s solid. The content I hesitated to recommend.

Since it’s here though try a chapter. Too early for me to rate.

Ched · Dec 8, 2021

Ched said: ↑

I’ve been reading this.

I don’t know if it’s library worthy or not but it’s amusing and easy to read and complete fuckery.

In terms of the actual writing it’s solid. The content I hesitated to recommend.

Since it’s here though try a chapter. Too early for me to rate.
Click to expand...

Oh, I kept reading this and read more. I don't like Twilight much but this was interesting. For what it's trying to do, probably 4/5 if I round up? Certainly better than Twilight actually was, but it's still not a fandom I'm that into. Nor am I really into romance / dating type fics, which... well, this is at least more romantic than Twilight was, so there's that.

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WIP Blue Moon by The Carnivorous Muffin - Twilight - M

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