My first instinct was that you were a troll, but you're a little too awesome for that.

Nice work man.

 

As said before, this is probably the most out-there story I've read in a long while. Originality is a very good (and rare thing these days with the number of fanfics around) but to what level?

This has the potential to be a very amusing fic (you really sure you won't change it to humor) or be a monumental flop. Either way, I look forward to newer chapters.

 

Leviathan!Harry would be for the lulz.

 

Hey, what does Harry look like? Is he just a squid? Or maybe half and half? Low fat?

Need descriptions.

 

Harry Squid made me lol. Nice work.

I don't really think this should be considered general, as even if you insist that this isn't humor, I'd think a Squid!Harry story should be in the AU section...

 

Two links.

One for Mufasa: Posting WIPs for review

One for kmfrank: Interesting Sticky


Nice start. Too short for me to rate, but enough to hook me. My favourite part, strangely enough, was the Map still showing Harry's name. Makes one wonder how human that squid still is.

One question: why did Pomfrey try to convince Dumbledore they should take the children to St. Mungo's? If she was a Death Eater, it was much more convenient to have them both in her possession so she could take them to Voldemort herself -- or bring him to the Hospital Wing, since it apparently was so easy. Her hesitation could only serve to raise Dumbledore's suspicions. (Which, oddly enough, weren't raised at all.)

Writing-wise, the punctuation in dialogues is all wrong and the wobbly sequence of tenses has already been pointed out. However those are not my main concerns, since you can easily correct them with a couple of grammatical rules.

I'm more bothered by how messy the writing felt. For instance, in the first chapter you jump from one point of view to another without giving us enough time to get into each character's head. In the second chapter, on the other hand, you wrote in James's point of view long enough to give us an idea of the state of stupor and despair he was in -- and all of sudden the writing felt more substantial.

Some paragraphs don't feel like a coherent unit, but rather like a bunch of sentences thrown together. It wasn't very smooth, it didn't really flow. I can't justify myself with writing rules or anything of the sort; it's just an impression I get.

Personally I would've liked longer chapters and more description; I "get into" the story better when I can see it. It's not just about visual impressions, either: there are also smells, sounds, feelings, everything that contributes to building an atmosphere.

That's all I have to say for now.

 

I read it this morning, what a way to wake up by the way, read the "cephalopod that lived" sentence and promptly laughed myself into a very short coma. The only major issue I have is the style that didn't seem to flow very well, but it's better than some of the crap I've conned myself into reading. Oh I shudder to think of exactly how the relationship will work though it did remind me of 'Larceny, Letchery and Lovegood's Tim the Tentacle Monster.

 

This, ftw.

I really thought this would be terrible, but the writing style is actually not bad at all, and the story is very amusing. I still don't quite understand how there is going to be a pairing though... Is Harry part-human? Or will he be put in an aquarium in Padma's dorm room?

 

Ha, there was a link in IRC a while back that showed how such a thing would work...

Ahhhh, Asians.

 

The only way I can see this not being a humor piece would be if baby Harry somehow transfigured himself into a squid (animagus?) due to accidental magic. His bones were supposedly crushed, so perhaps that had something to do with the boneless form he assumed.

While the "cephalopod who lived" stuff is lulzy, it's just that - good for a laugh. Again, if this is supposed to be a somewhat serious piece I'm not seeing why he'd be called that, unless of course he was found as a squid on the verge of death as a baby. It still doesn't seem to fit, however, that some random resident of the lake (even if he is the Giant Squid's son) would have an almost-title like that.

Last thing - does the author know what a guppy is? Those really, really tiny fish? I'm not sure what a young squid (giant squid?) would want to do with a fish that small, when it's probably one of thousands and thousands and probably isn't magical (or sentient). I know it's the author's story and not mine, but these little things lead me to look at the fic as a big joke (Gus the Guppy?) instead of a semi-serious piece.

 

Wait a second, wait just one second.

Is Sree up to no good again? This seems like something he may do....

 

Now that you say it, I feel like it has to be.

But strangely, I'm disappointed...

 

This is awesome.
Man, I agree- couldn't you have waited at least for 8 chapters?
If you continue at this level, I'd give you a 4.5/5.
Now, as it is, I won't rate it. But I'm definitely interested.

 

*snickers* 3.5/5 for sheer amusement value.

 

I sense a trap

Regardless it made me laugh so 3.5

 

After over 400k HP fanfictions, people can still come up with a nice original gem like this one. I'm really looking forward to reading more. I think the little gimps of new type of magic like the whirlpool transportation was a nice addiction. Although I would think Luna would be a better fitting pairing for a squid. The absurdity would be hilarious.

 

On hand, the idea is certainly original and may turn out well but on the other hand you can articulate squid Harry in any serious way. First to chapters are not bad but they haven't captivated me either. I will wait for the next chapters though.

 

...huh? Huh. Hmmm.

 

So, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this fic is likely just supposed to be a joke.

My reasoning? Shredder of Paper's latest work of art:

Title: Ron Weasley and the Curse of the Black
Rating: T
Genre: Spiritual/Poetry
DLP Category: (?)
Pairings: Ron W. & Alphard B.
Status: WIP
Summary: Ron is alone. Abandoned by his friends and family, he finally has to stand on his own. All his life he was one of many, suffocated by countless family and famous friends. No longer.
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5302060/1/Ron_Weasley_and_the_Curse_of_the_Black

I won't bother you guys with specifics, but I'll just say that most of chapter 2 consists of quoting a Soulja Boy song.

I was dying laughing when I read the reviews, which I'm going to assume were all posted by the author. I particularly enjoyed this review by shredder of paper fanboy:

"excellent work, shredder of paper at his best here I cant wait for more!"

Overall, props to the author for the lulz factor.

 

I was wondering when someone would point that out. For the record, most of it relies on having read my first story to understand it, but that's for another time and place. I also did not write any reviews for my works--however I will say all but 2 on my first story and all 3 of them in that quoted story are by friends and family who I forced to review. Calamari is filled with original reviews, only one of which was written by someone I know of.

Basically here's why I have such vastly different stories--calamari is fun for me because I can watch the favorite count, the alert count, and the reviews climb rapidly, all indicators of a decent story. I like watching those numbers, so I write to the best of my ability. The curse of the black series, however is just tons of fun to write. I enjoy doing that, and I enjoy forcing friends and family to read it and act proud So one I do for the stats and the other for the lulz.

[and for the record, chapter 2 is not just soulja boy. There are no less than 5 entire songs quoted in that chapter, and that's only in the second half of it!]

As for calamari, I was on vacation for a bit, but I'm back now and very nearly done with chapter 3. Fret not, I haven't abandoned it.