Myself, my wife, and Insect have been working the last day or so on coming up with questions and answers for our own version of CAH. It's been a giant hit at the meets, but some of the cards get repeated a lot, or aren't very funny. Looking to get people to help us flesh this out, with questions and answers. The better ones we'll add to the list, and we'll print them out to be used at future meetups I sponsor/organize, and we'll post the finished list online so you can make your own.

Here's what we've got so far.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0Am7Si0gbEXVodFhPc1FCTElHVjBlQ3lmXzVqYldfdWc

For those of you who don't know how the game is played. The judge draws a question card. Other players have answer cards, usually up to 10, but we wind up just throwing a ton of them to each person. The judge reads the question, for example:

Q: What does the ultimate Happy Meal have as the toy?

We pick answers, hand them to the judges:
Midknight: Getting oral sex in the back of McDonalds
Wifey: A goddamn sexual tyrannosaurus
Insect: Meet up sex at a all guys campout.
Krogan: The Wittness Brotection Program
Raven: Triangles

The judge reads What does the ultimate Happy Meal have as the toy? Triangles? Nope not funny. Witness Brotection Pro... nope not funny. a goddamn sexual t rex, lmfao. Oral sex in back of McD's.

He picks the best one/funniest/sickest one. In this case if I were the judge, I'd pick the Sexual Trex. I had the question card to the person who played it, then I hand them the pile of question cards.


I need questions and I need answers. The dirtier, the sicker, the better, NOT Harry Potter inspired.. Post them here, I'll put them in the list as I like them.

 

Isn't the Michael Jackson's Final Words one redundant, since one of the actual cards asks his final thoughts?
Anyways, "Dolores Umbridge's Saggy Tits"

 

Nope, because we're not mixing the two. I want one totally DLP inspired. That does NOT MEAN, Harry Potter inspired. Dear fucking god I dont want Harry Potter inspired. You're just the sickest bastards I know is all.

 

"The Office."

What really killed JBlaise?

The last time Snarf and The Heir pulled twins shenanigans, <BLANK> happened!

 

DLP inspired as in:

"Averis' original rap name was <BLANK>"

"At the Emerald Isle meet up Midknight <BLANK> with <BLANK> like a total boss."

"Quoth the Raven, <BLANK>"

That type of thing??? Or am I missing the point?

 

"What is bigger than Seratin's chin?"
"Why is Sree so angry?"

 

Shezza left Jon when she discovered his...

When JKR confirmed the existence of magical cores, Taure...





...ran away with OllieK and Sacro.

...was found in a locked room with two dildos.

...challenged Oz to a drinking contest.

 

I read those last three as Taure's misadventures.

 

"Irene's Face," "Scrib's Mom," "soem rocks," and "Vagkaban" all come to mind.

How will xion bring about the robot apocalypse?

Jon broke DLP with (blank)

 

Yes/no. I'm trying to have something we could play with nonDLP members and it'd make sense. I should be more cleared. Not really any name dropping, but just our version of humor inspired.

"On my beach house vacation BLANK did Blank, and it gave him an upset stomach."

"On my beach house vacation a _Fucking Sexual TRex_ did _surprise buttsex with a midget _, and it gave him an upset stomach."

I'm looking for more shock value stuff, less name specific to DLP things. More verbs, less Names.

 

Ah. Made by DLP but not DLP centric. In that case..

Sample Q. When I ran out of toilet paper, I used...
Peace in the Middle East will come through...

...Molestation in the book store
...m-preg
...A spontaneous sex change
...A midget cockslap
...A recto-vaginal fistula
...The Israel-Palestine conflict
...necrotic toenails
...Fred Phelps
...hot dog water

More along those lines?

 

Absolutely.

 

Sample Q's:
- Heaven is really like <BLANK>
- Things on the Last Supper Dinner Menu include <BLANK>
- <BLANK> is the primary punishment method at the World's Worst Orphanage?
- <BLANK> is how JFK really died
- Google searches from the Pope's web browser history include <BLANK>

Sample A's:
- Kittens Covered with Spikes
- Kids with Ass AIDS (seriously, I know it's already in there, this is my vote for multiples)
- Singing FALALALALAs until your head explodes
- Baby whale ass marinated with the tears of virgins
- A crushing blow from a frozen shit-chunk dropped from an airplane


Yeah... I'll keep thinking on these...

 

A midget crotch punched a baby because...

Hades was sent to rehab with...

A llama and a pigeon were caught...

In Mitt Romney's closet, the FBI found...



...anal hymens.

...skull fucking a dead goat.

...sleeping with a life sized Kim Jong Il body pillow.

...a badger prostitution ring.

 

Thoroughly disappointed in the recent answers, mostly just gross things and awkwardly 'obscene' nouns and adjectives thrown together.

Just think they could be less crass (in a bad way). I dunno, none of them have been funny in the slightest to me.

 

Q. Your future wife comes back in time to <Blank> you with a <Blank>
Q. The second cold war will be fought using <Blank>
Q. <Blank> was sick enough to create this game

Think of more when it isn't 5am.

EDIT: Almost forgot this one, "What is the worst thing to find growing in between your girlfriend's breasts?"

 

Wasn't the idea shock value? Or was it just shock value on a lesser scale? I got the impression the aim was for lines that were rather out there.

 

"The most dapper gentleman at the ball was wearing..."

"The little girl drew a beautiful picture of..."

"The little boy got detention for..."

"They changed the name of Sex Education again. This time to..."

"I was so worried about the test that I <blank>"

"Her employees found <blank> on her facebook wall."

"Bella Swan enjoys <blank> when Edward isn't around."

"<blank> is Britain's favorite pastime."

"<blank> is America's favorite snack."

"When Texas secedes, they'll start..."

"80% of Americans think <blank> is god's will."