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Chessboards of Light and Dark by jon3776 - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by LT2000, Mar 1, 2006.

  1. LT2000

    LT2000 Heir

    Joined:
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    Title: Chessboards of Light and Dark
    Author: jon3776
    Rating: M (R)
    Pairing(s): Harry/Many (don't think anybody here cares about Mudblood and Weasel)
    Summary - What if Voldemort had been a more calculating villain? What if he saw the similarities between himself and Harry that we see? What if he did something about it? Can Harry and his friends withstand the lure of darkness when everything they could ever want sits within its shadows?

    Link - http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2814170/1/

    Basically this is an alternate interpretation of Drake's story about Harry and company being trained by Voldemort in Quirrell's body and lured towards the dark side. However, I would expect some conflict in this version, as Dumbledore will also be taking part in the training as a Light influence. I would also like to think that it'll avoid the ridiculousness that the other story fell into. Definitely worth a long, assuming the author can avoid his usual habit of falling off the face of the Earth for long periods of time.
     
  2. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Yeah, I read this start. Not bad, but it remains to be seen how zealous the author will be with posting new chapters.
     
  3. Scarty

    Scarty Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    The start is promissing, i hope he makes something good from this idea
     
  4. Dark Lord Rostam

    Dark Lord Rostam Button La Famiglia Midknight

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    This story looks very promising I only hope that he gradually goes away from Ron and Hermione I HATE THEM!!! but i hate it when its sudden it should be gradually *whew* where was i. o yea its good i hope he continues
     
  5. oldmagic

    oldmagic Seventh Year

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    well it's good to just keep a look out for many of the aspects for harry to be more independent but still view his own beliefs and principals. this reminds me too much of the star wars 3 movie. Anaken and harry are so similer alike. i think.
     
  6. Xiph0

    Xiph0 Yoda Admin

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    It's certainly a decent start.

    I would have liked to see much more detail into their plotting, though I understand why the readers could not.

    Liked the format, spacing and spelling.
     
  7. Lord Osiris

    Lord Osiris Auror

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    Seems to me that it is coming along well, i do believe that it will far surpass Drake's fic though i doubt it will reach the quantity of it.
     
  8. That_Boy

    That_Boy DLP Elite DLP Supporter

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    Drake's fic got so stupid with Harry/Harem that it got harder and harder to read and as far as I know it's still only 2 chapters. They've known eachother for 1 term and are teaching each other to mutually-masturbate.
     
  9. apicard

    apicard Guest

    Fantastic story with the chance to really kick ass! :ph34r:
     
  10. Veriaty

    Veriaty Guest

    It has quite a lot of potential though I would've liked the conversation between Snape and Dumbledore to be expanded somewhat. It should be interesting to see what other ideas the author uses to shape the story.
     
  11. Prophet of the Waves

    Prophet of the Waves First Year

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    There are a few things I don't get about this story but the auther might have done it on porpuse like how Ron told Hermoine before the troll attacked her when thats when Harry and ron became friends with them and a few other small things like that but otherwise I like the story.
     
  12. Wisdom's Mountain

    Wisdom's Mountain Sixth Year

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    Just thought I'd point this out from the story's first AN. I've never seen a Hermione/Harem fic before. Looks like someone's a Hermione fanboy...
     
  13. LT2000

    LT2000 Heir

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    Nah, he's not...he's just a devout believer in the canon 'sanctity' of the Harry/Ron/Hermione trio friendship, so in the end they'll be included in whatever he's doing to some extent. My personal opinion is that he should leave them behind in this fic, but I'm not the author.
     
  14. Nukular Winter

    Nukular Winter The Chosen One DLP Supporter

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    Not so much...

    What Jon was saying is that over the course of the story (which will cover all 7 years if I understand him properly), Hermione will have several (i.e. 'many') relationships, although not all at once (I don't see a male harem for her, sorry to disappoint).
     
  15. Nukular Winter

    Nukular Winter The Chosen One DLP Supporter

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    In this story, the friendship with Hermione never developed and Harry's already started the process of disassociating from Ron. There will probably be a R/Hr friendship, but there's definitely not going to be a golden trio.
     
  16. ChuckDaTruck

    ChuckDaTruck Overlord

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    Inside YOUR closet. Go check.
    This is exceptional Great Start, but its only a start.
     
  17. participium

    participium Guest

    Hmm, I don't know. I find it to OOC. Now I don't mind OOC but there was no gradual evolution.
    Harry would not join a group started by Severus snape. This is set after halloweens as Harry and Hermione are already friends. At that point Harry was already convinced Snape was pure evil. The club should happen faster

    What you wrote about Hermione doesn't seem right either. Basicly yous seem to be falling into the same trap as so many other writers have. They don't like a character so suddenly it turns into an idiot. (look at all the manipulative Dumbledore stories where he turns into a fool) Hermione is powerfull, she was the first to learn the patrunus (faster than cho chang), she was able to do past NEWTS charms etc. A plausible explanation would be that Snape let's her in but that she is appalled by what they are taught and leaves That way you would have a break up between Harry and Hermione too because Harry doesn't follow her.

    The idea is great but the the way you work it out can be better in my opinion. I feel there's something missing.
     
  18. Dark Lord Rostam

    Dark Lord Rostam Button La Famiglia Midknight

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    Bullshit. She is not fucking powerful. Harry mastered Patronus first, he had to teach it to her step by step. She has done no powerful spells other than that, and has only done one, ONE, Newt charm.

    The protean charm, all it does is give information to people you want. Big fucking deal, you want to ride her jock, do it in the character bashing thread.

    Eh, it was good at first, but with such a long break and he is still taking forever. I think it's going nowhere.
     
  19. Wisdom's Mountain

    Wisdom's Mountain Sixth Year

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    Oh I'm so disapointed... Playa!Hermione is my kind of story! /sarcasm
     
  20. cmuylistoooo

    cmuylistoooo Fourth Year

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    i am waiting to see how this turns out...i always enjoy jon's stories even though they heavily involve hermione, ginny, and the weasleys....i do like his dumbledore though..
     
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