Edit:Oh yes. Warning, contains massive spoilers.


Ch.3: Hmm... not bad, not bad. The 'witch who won' bit was interesting to say the least. I think it's a little absurd that they can taste the difference between 'Elf' wine and regular. It's also rather foolish to be wasting ministry resources on something as mundane as checking whether or not a cook has access or connections to the magical world.

Ch.4: Well at least Harry hasn't been a moron and gotten caught yet.

Ch.5: Oh for the love of all that's holy! OH MY GOSH! Teddy, who is the god-son of someone I personally helped inter, called a chef on the night he vanished! Ergo it's now a mystery, and the only way he could have warned him or even knew him is if it was His godfather who must obviously have faked his own death! My god! why didn't I see it before!11!!!1!

Give me a break, Obsess much?

Ch.6: at least it starts out by admitting the previous Idea is the height of lunacy...

-Facepalms-

'Specialis Revelio'? Dear lord strike me down!

Ooooh, an anger charged 'Finate Incantatum' can overcome the power of the elder wand and Harry's desire not to be found.

The constant flashbacks that Harry and Hermoine have to each other during their 'time at hogwarts' is about as subtle as a person dyed woad blue walking nude down the middle of Interstate during rush hour.

Invasion of privacy Hermoine? Tsk Tsk. Why does it never occur to the 'champions of the light' that they tend to violate all the rules they champion? Did you consider... oh I dunno... ASKING Teddy why he contacted the cook?

-Rolls eyes-
And finding nothing, our heroine goes though the root directories of the computer she shouldn't be using, because obviously if there's nothing on there it just means your not looking hard enough.

Good lord. It was a good story up to this chapter, but I'm gagging on all the Deus Ex this one is trying to cram down my throat.

If the next one starts off with a confession by teddy, or hermoine manages to bug his phone and/or cast an 'evesdropping' charm on him while he's talking to harry I'm going to have to auto fail this story regardless how good it was up to now.

Chapter 7: The story fails epically here. Let's all play dose the minor with Vertiserum on a hunch.

Fails. Out and out fails. I'm sorry, the rest of the story could be godlike, an epic of never before seen perfection, but I just can't read it any more.

4.5/5 for the first five chapters, but six and seven force me to give this a solid 2. Yes, they fail that epically.

 

Just checking... you do realise that this spell is canon, right?

 

Rofl, you just got fucking owned Manatheron.

I have to say, I am disappointed that this doesn't look as if it is going to get into the library. Ah well.

 

Just caught up with the last few chapters of this. It's still holding my interest, even though 2 out of the 3 conflicts in the story have been resolved:

Spoiler

1 - The debilitating effects of the Hallows on Harry (check)
2 - The inability of Harry and Hermione to be together (check)
3 - The investigation into Blaise Zabini and the cartels (?)

The business with Blaise Zabini and the cartels is the only thing left to resolve, but I am curious to see just how H and Hr bring them down.

I'm raising my rating to 3.5/5 (4 for the stars). This is probably the best WiP on portkey, but there's just something about it that doesn't click completely with me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@Manatheron: Why exactly is Hermione's questioning of Teddy an insta-fail? If you liked the earlier chapters, I don't see why her behavior would come as that much of a surprise. It's clear from the start that she believes Harry is still alive and that she's obsessed with finding him.

 

Is this posted anywhere other than portkey? That site's format always gives me a headache.

 

It gives me a headache too...

I used Graffer to download it, so here you go: http://militis.boldlygoingnowhere.org/Paracelsus_Coming_Back_Late.html

 

-Rolls eyes-

Yes, cause we all LOVE what Rowling did with the last three books...



darklordmike: It's not questioning him that failed, it's using vertiserum on him that fails. There was a million and one other ways for harry to be outed, everything from him slipping up, to teddy making a mistake and being overheard but for some reason she just had to use a restriction potion on a minor. The type of potion I might add, that's appearently to difficult to make for it to be used in routine trials.

Also, you seem to have missed the review of chapter 5. The questioning Farce in 6 was just the straw that broke the camels back so to speak.

Edit: Also, Clear from the start? She seemed pretty positive he was dead until she countered the Elder-wand-transfigured-stick in chapter5

 

Yeah, you're right about this; I re-read Chapter 5.

But we'll just have to disagree on how irrational Hermione's behavior is. There's a pretty clear line of causes leading to the veritaserum questioning:

Spoiler

1 - Her department just misses catching up with Jacob Clayman, an anonymous wizard that they want to question
2 - Hermione discovers that Teddy Lupin spoke to Clayman on the phone just before Clayman hightailed it out of dodge. She wonders why Teddy would be protecting this man.
3 - She has the crazy idea that Teddy is protecting his godfather just like Harry protected Sirius, so tries to prove herself mistaken. She investigates Harry's wand, and discovers that it's just an old transfigured stick
4 - Her curiosity now thoroughly roused, she sneaks a look at Teddy's computer and discovers a 'Guardian Angel' file filled with heroic deeds over the years. 'Saving-People-Thing,' anyone?
5 - Now convinced that Harry is alive and Teddy is hiding him, she's incensed and determined to get to the heart of the matter immediately. Ergo, veritaserum.

It makes sense to me, especially considering what a stubborn bloodhound Hermione is when she gets one of her notions.

 

Liked it. It's not especially exciting, but well written and very plausible. I liked the whole "master of death" treatment. Much better than canon. That's essentially what this story was. Canon-esque, but with a cool, minty flavor. Four stars.

 

I can follow the chain of events, I just can't see most of them happening. (See review of chapter5) Also for anyone who hasn't played around with DOS, scanning the boot directory of the computer would be fucking hard, Noticing a specific directory while their flying past would be harder, thinking to yourself 'This directory obviously shouldn't be here' while doing so would be fucking insane.

It just wouldn't happen, even looking for something out of the ordinary with the kind of sites she claimed he was visiting there's bound to be add ware with all kinds of weird ass titles floating around his computer's sub-directories. <-- this, is when I could no longer suspend disbelief (OK, I take it back, countering the elder with a 'Finate' was was when it happened the first time, but I was still willing to keep reading at that point) there was just too much fail packed into those two chapters.

Like I said, 1-4 was good, and for all I know, 7-end could be the greatest fic ever written, but I just can't get past the crap in five and six.

Edit: For the record I agree that she wasn't exactly mentally stable and I could Indeed see her trying shit like that, I just can't see it working. (Though I admit it would be a great base to build from if your trying to show how nuts she was going before she found out the truth. She keeps trying and failing to prove he's still alive, and then suddenly she finds out she's been right all along and kept barely missing the proof.)

 

@CheddarTrek: I would definitely recommend that you at least give the fic a try. I myself enjoyed it immensely, mainly due to the rather well done mystery.

As for Ron and Hermione being married, sort of.

Spoiler

They had a magically binding marriage ceremony and are now both stuck in a marriage they both wish didn't exist (Hermione more so than Ron, who still seems to have some sort of lingering feelings for her).

 

Updated. Thought you'd like to know.

 

4/5 for this story from me. I wonder why this isn't in the library when stories like Journeyman Potter are.

 

Because Journeyman Potter is from 8 years ago or so?

Things have changed since then, it was great for its time.

 

Also, Journeyman Potter story is not abandoned, unlike this one.

 

@Hachi, agreed, but it doesn't belong in the library by current standard. They should make a separate section for such old stories, say, like Classics.
@Photon, pretty sure that there're many abandoned stories in the library. Would like to hear a good argument as to why this shouldn't be as this has now many more chapters than when it was last reviewed. Most of the arguments before me seem to be 'We don't like Harry/Hermione shipping, plus it's on portkey, so it must be bad'.

 

As always, ratings are not perfect measurement of story quality. It is just how various people voted.

And yes, at least some liked this story less because it includes Harry/Hermione.