Title: Detention with Sinistra
Author: Cancel Subscription
Rating: M, although T would probably be good enough.
Genre: General
Pairing: Harry/Sinistra
Summary: Detention has never been so fun!

Link: Detention with Sinistra (FF.net)

 

First off, the use of break in the story annoyed me. Now for the actual fic well, nothing actually happened. It just seemed that the author wanted to write down a teacher fantasy for himself set in the HP universe. I think a good oneshot should be more like Countdown by Silens Cursor. On the other hand if you want smut just do it right like Oedipus Flower by Rage Buddha. I guess my point is that this clearly isn't library worthy IMO.

2/5

 

Not even close to being library worthy, IMO. It's comprehensible, though. Excruciatingly boring, but comprehensible. Breaks really....break...the flow of the story. Well, they would, if there was a flow. Or a story.

Dammit, after rereading I have to take back the point I gave for writing in English instead of gibberish. Sinestra produces a tong out of fucking nowhere, unless she's replaced her tongue with one. Actually, that image amused me more than this fic. So it did do something right, I guess.

Updated rating: 1/5

 

When you're writing about a character whose personality isn't developed in canon, you should probably try to develop it yourself.

1/5

 

Might as well make the rating K+ because nothing happened in this at all. I don't get why Harry would be so nervous about a detention. After having a dozen detentions a year, some with the likes of Snape, Umbridge and Filch, he wouldn't be scared by the fairly normal astronomy professor.

1/5.

 

Meh. I added a little twist to the end since you guys are such whiny bastards.

 

I had my suspicions that you were the author. Just so you know promoting your own work is pretty frowned upon. Also, after finishing your little "add on" I can tell you're kind of butthurt from our reviews. Since I don't want to be a complete asshole I suggest going to the WBA to further expand your writing.

 

Someone is bound to say it, but in addition to WBA thread, you should post here. http://forums.darklordpotter.net/forumdisplay.php?f=29

 

Actually, I think people are somewhat split over the matter of promoting your own work. I think the rule of law is, we don't want people promoting their own work if it sucks sweaty balls.

Which you definitely qualify for Lycanthropy. Yeah, your "twist" took what had the potential to be unremarkable smut and turned it into a story that was simply unpleasant to read. I would normally temper my response to a degree, but by throwing in that "twist" due to a few reviews, it's obvious that you're whoring yourself out for reviews and reactions.

Rating: Not Worth Rating

Ban this sucker.

 

Kens got there first, but I'm myself a bit of a promotion whore (OP: I'm giving you a rec. Read my fic and review) so I can't fault the OP for that.

However, I can and will fault the OP for writing something so fucking pointless.



Not even close to library worthy.

 

You did the right thing.

I was mistaken. You suck.

 

No, that's FF.net trying to protect everyone from this failure. The story is still up. Why it is up is incomprehensible, but it is up.

On the subject of chapter 2: Lycanthropy, I hate to break it to you, but it's terrible, you're terrible, and you should feel bad.

 

It's still up.

And chapter two just made me want to bleach clean my eyes.

 

A waste of time. Not terribly unpleasant, but below average; not even worthy of the Recycling Bin.

2/5. You can probably do better. Come up with an actual idea, before putting words on the screen - that usually helps.

 

You know, before I read the fic I was confused as to why everyone was so angry over a PWP wic. Then it turned out there wasn't even a lemon. It's just nothing.

 

First chapter was meh in the extreme, second chapter was a lame attempt to be funny/shocking, and as has been said came across as a reaction to criticism more than anything else. So yeah, nothing much good to say about it really. Seemed ok gramatically etc, I guess, but that's hardly praiseworthy.

1/5

 

Free bleach to anyone who wants it after reading the second chapter.

 

Nobody raped him for this statement? Sad times indeed.

The writing is not horrible, but the mechanics seem lacking. The second chapter was...meh. You don't suck monkey balls, you just need to extrapolate and not expect instant admiration for something you have not worked hard at.

You want attention for this, try another forum. Want to improve, improve the attitude.

1/5.

EDIT: I CAN do internet tough-guy. I'm so proud of myself. :3.

 

This is pretty terrible. No glaring mistakes as far as grammar is concerned (at least none I can spot) but it's so bland that I want my 2 minutes back after reading it. The second chapter is...well what can I say about it that hasn't already been said? 1/5