So, I was checking my email inbox the other day and I got this PM. At first, I though "Wow! Massive PM" and I started to preen my ego. Then, when I read it- well, I'll let you do the reading. I think I might need some help if creating a...strongly worded...reply along the lines of "I'll rather eat lead and rot in hell, you stupid preteen bitch."

Oh, and it's not a troll. I checked out the profile link and her favorites, and there are idiots who have actually responded to challenges from her before.



Name: Harry Snape-Potter
Profile: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/836524/
--------------------

I have a challenge for you. I really do enjoy your writing, so I thought you
would do justice to the plot I have. I am not that much of a writer, I never
have been. So, that is why I am asking you. So I really do hope you accept
this, and will write this story. I've thought about this plot but I never
really thought it would be a good story. But my friends say it sounds really
good, I just need some fine tuning.

Ok, so it’s a four part story.

The first part of this story is where Harry comes and lives with Snape, and
how there fatherson relationship grows into a strong family bond. How Harry is
raised and how Snape deals with fatherhood and such. You can pick if they are
biologically, adoption, or blood magic related. Also the Malfoy family are
like his second family. Both Harry and Draco were raised together but they
have anything but brotherly feelings for each other. They are raised to be
perfected purebloods in front of everyone (i.e. mean, cold, emotionless
towards everyone) but be hide close doors there anything but that. They are
loving, caring, and protective family.

The second part is how Harry develops a relationship with Draco, and how they
come to fall in love and such. Where Harry comes into his inheritances, as the
heir of Merlin and the Founders of Hogwarts and he also finds out the he’s
not fully human and that he has creature blood in him. (You can pick if he’s
the hair of the vampire, veela, or Elven.) Draco also finds out the he’s not
fully human and that he has creature blood in him. (Same goes for Draco you
can pick if he’s the hair of the vampire, veela, or Elven.) Both Harry and
Draco grow and learn about life's lessons and the meaning to them. This part
of the story is where Draco and Harry go from being a boy to men. They learn
about love, family, honor, duty, lost, pain, and such. By the end LV should be
dead, and they are ready to start there own life when the third part of this
story comes into play.

The third part is where Harry, Snape, Draco, and the Malfoy family get
transported to a different world. They learn that Neville is BoyWhoLived, who
is a spoiled rich kid who can't do anything for shit. In this world their
Harry, Snape, Draco, and the Malfoy family are all dead so it’s a shocker to
see them alive and kicking. They help and destroy LV, but not without causing
and disturbing this world. By the end they return there own world. Also Lily,
James, Sirius, and Remus are all alive.

The fourth and last part is where the SnapeMalfoyPotter family has there
happily everafter. They return to there own world or they can stay in this
world (you can pick which one). This is about family and love and trying to
have a normal life and raising there kids.

1. This is also a Lords/Lady theme.
2. Bashing of H. Granger, Ron W., and Molly W.
3. Ginny is LV Lover/Whore.
4. Percy is a Death Eater.
5. Each story is has to have over 50,0 words and over 25 chapters.
6. This is a Dark and Explicit story. With violences, sexual theme, and
language. "M" rated.
7. Umbitch and Fudge bashing.
8. Granger is whoreing herself to Dumbledore and to anyone else you want. (As
you can tell I really don't like Granger.)
9. Mpreg also at some point.
10. Harry and Draco are both physically, mentally, politically, and
magically powerful.
11. Harry and Draco never went to Hogwarts or any of the European School.
They come in there 7th year when there both legal age 17 or 18.
12. Oh and of course they all have to be hot.

So, what do you think? Would you be up to the challenge, where many couldn't
handle this? If not, then could you tell me who might be interested in it? I
have asked 10 people about this challenge and all the response I got was "No".
So what do you say, are you up to the challenge?

~ SnapePotter

 

And let me guess, she left out "I wonder why".

Post your response, if you made one.

 

That challenge was made from FAIL and AIDS!

Sure, the Ginny and Hermione part COULD make sense.

If Voldemort promises Ginny that she get's Harry, G would likely work/ sleep with him.

Albus is clearly powerful and a genius. Hermione adores knowledge.

 

THERE IS HOPE FOR HUMANITY YET!!!1!!

 

Hahaha.

This is absolutely wonderful.


While all instinct screams revulsion towards it, I think it'd be hilarious if you accepted the challenge.

You don't even have to write it all- it can be a DLP-wide thing where volunteers can add chapters to it and satire the hell out of it.



OR...

A simple 'no' would also suffice.

 

Lulz! I love how she writes the term you can pick, as though she is being generous to offer you so much freedom. The fact that she is most likely serious about this, makes it all the more hilarious.

 

From paragraph 1

Suggested Response: Your first thoughts about this were right...After I read that, I skipped the rest of your horrible e-mail. I do hope in the future you listen to your gut instinct when deciding if something is bad or good.

Sheeza

PS. Does your gut instinct, by chance, tell you to kill yourself? If it doesn't, I take back my comment about listening to your gut instinct. Instead, you should run all of your decisions by me, starting with "Should I become intimately familiar with what it feels like for a bullet to pass through my skull?" My answer is yes

 

[22:10:25] [Tehan] Chicks are never allowed to complain about male obsession with lesbians or anal sex ever again.

 

I like how she completely misinterpreted the no's. Shezza, you should totally consider explaining to her that, while you are up to the challenge, you don't want to accept it.

And lulz at her stating that the author can do the challenge justice, when the challenge can't do justice to the meanest of authors.

 

Do it like Sree did that Potter Tradition of Red thing. Gogogogo!

 

Hand it over to the Doctor and his anti-slash terrorists. They'll know what to do.

 

The gheeeeey-ness hurts my eyes.

Flame this tool. Tell her, point for point, why her ideas are horrible. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

There is no way this is for real. Someone is playing a (poor) joke on you Shezza.

 

There's no way to know that nowadays, unless the person comes out and says so. Even then I'd still be doubtful: fangirl failure is at an all-time high.

 

...Wow.

Sounds like an exciting story!

What the hell?And 5,00 words each story...That'll be difficult to slice into 25 chapters.

But, seriously...That HAS to be a troll.

There's no way that people are that...

Okay. So perhaps it's not. Tell her that you have a challenge first. In order to write her story, you demand that she wins the Darwin awards. Until she does so, you refuse(emphatically, if you'd like), to do her crappy story.

 

...and please kill your friends or at the very least let a camel rape them. Everyone who likes such an idea deserves to be put down.


I do like the idea of writing a satire...you could crush her/his hopes and dreams one by one.
Alternatively you could just send him/her the link to this thread.

 

Has no one read the win that is The Potter Tradition of Red?

 

You should accept the challenge and do the opposite of everything she wants

 

TAKE THE CHALLENGE.

I'm loling at the possibilities already. I'm not much of an author but I think I could successfully pull of the fail needed for some parts of this challenge.

 

What would be the opposite of being adopted/the son of Snape? You could spend your entire life trying to find that.

Shezza, what you need to do is take the author's pseudonym, then name one of your throwaway characters in DK after her, and have her killed in the most brutal/ironic/congruent way possible.