Dark Minion found why I thought that story will be horrible.
The plot in the summery, and how many times we will see it once again in the future.

 

At what length do you make the cut? I imagine if you pick to high a number you filter out a great many stories with potential that only have a chapter or so...

 

I set it to 5000. Out of 10.500 pages with HP-fics only 2.800 pages are displayed.

I might miss a few oneshots and all stories which are abandoned before they reach the line but so I don't have to deal with the worst crap, which usually is abandoned within the first three to four 900words chapters.

 

I think the stupidest summeries always include the following formula.

X does something arbitrary, Y obliges. (Commonly found in M/M Slash)

I seriously want to rip the author's skull out and beat them to death with it.

But hey, that's me.

 

I filter by at least 10,000 if I'm looking for potential fics (I'm in a nice mood) and 40,000 if I just want to read. I don't know how you can stand wading through all the shit summaries.

 

Before DLP, I never read the first chapter of a story when that was all their was. I'm one of those kinds of people who wait until at least chapter seven or so before I start reading. Usually tells me if the author is serious about his fic or not and also gives me an idea of how crappy his story is. That way, I wad through almost all of the crap and have at least an hour of reading to do. It's nice.

 

Anima Gemella » by Faebabe reviews
HARRY HAS KILLED VOLDY. MINISTRY IS MAKING EVRY1 16 TAKE THE ANIMA GEMELLA POTION 2 FIND THIER SOULMATES. 1ST 6 CHAPTERS REPOSTED DUE 2 CHANGE. PLZE REVIEW & GIVE ME IDEAS. MPREG SLASH, HPSS, DMGW, SFDTPPPPLB, BZLB, GGSSHHRR, SBRL MULTIPAIRING INCEST LUV
Fiction Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,927 - Reviews: 43 - Updated: 9-26-07 - Published: 8-3-07

 

Behold, I have found the most serious crime against innocent readers

As I read this I felt my brain cells rot and a huge headache coming


FF.net Naruto Archive

this is ninja nonsense » by mr.raboto reviews

onsok are yuo shure this is the sumary area onsokamaru is never wrong never doudt yuo sensei onsok this look like a girls room sees ino oh CRa& run bitch jose say too onsok poof
Fiction Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,128 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 9-24-07 - Published: 9-7-07​

 

The very idea that the Ministry is forcing everyone to find their soul mates is repulsive.

That list of slash pairings gave me a mental image of all those characters' looks of horror upon finding out that they were destined to be with people of their own gender. I mean come on, I've nothing against homosexuality, but the entire magical populace of Britain?

 

Considering how Bass Ackwards the whole wizarding world seems to be...

I still maintain we need someone to write a Dimension jumper harry who ends up in a world where all the other wizards are gay and he decides its his 'duty as a true warrior of the light' to help renew the gene pool with the witches.

And naturally both sides cheer him on. the guys for saving them from doing it, and the girls cause all that quiddich obviously turned him into a 6'10" sex god with rippling abs, flashing eyes, and 'trademark messy potter hair'

in a completely unrelated note will everyone who thinks this plot would make a great premise for a serious fic instead of a comedy please tell us.

so we can begin the relentless ridicule hehehe

 

Don't forget about his trademark lopsided grin and those deep, inviting pools of emerald into which one could easily lose herself/himself.

 

Oh god, my mind just asploded.


1. A Date With The Potions Master by FallenAngel42 reviews

Harry and Slughorn spend a magical night in the woods
Complete - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 234 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 8-6-07 - Published: 8-6-07​

Its one review is simply:
LOL

I read it, it is so incredibly messed up.



Dudley's Devious Deeds by elrondistehrapist reviews

Harry is hot and naked in his room, but little does he know that Dudley is getting an eyeful of his pert and perky bum. What will happen when hotness erupts between the two Marilyn Manson fans? Will one of them become pregnant or do suicide? Find out!
Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 708 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 9-15-07 - Published: 9-15-07​

Sorry if these are repeats, but I don't think so.



Edit:
ho noes » reviews

SNAYP IS TEH EMO IN HOGGWARTZ N HE RLY LURVES HARRY BUTT HAIRY DONT LUV HIM BAK SO HE DECYDES TO KILLZ HIMSELF!111 : TIS IS A VERY SADD STORY N I CRY WEN I RITEZ IT
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 343 - Reviews: 26 - Updated: 9-16-07 - Published: 9-16-07

the tail of a princes » reviews

cann evangeluna find her destinie can she escaope the evil rapist elrond find out plz reveiw!
Lord of the Rings - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,518 - Reviews: 66 - Updated: 6-29-06 - Published: 6-17-06​

 

There are people who write crap to make fun of the others.

 

Thank God for that.

 

74. Choose Your Own Adventure: Draco meets Reality » by Dracoismyredkryptonite reviews

What if we wished so hard that Draco was real?What would he really be like?What would it do to him?This is if Draco came to our world,with an appearence by Hermione later, there will be rape,violence,sex,murder.Read if you like Draco. Review please.
Fiction Rated: M - English - General - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,294 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 9-27-07 - Published: 7-26-07

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3683228/1/Choose_Your_Own_Adventure_Draco_meets_Reality

I want to kill this bitch and all that she loves.

 

In that author's profile?

Falling from Grace » by dinkyfairybaby reviews

Self Harm, Rape, and sexual content sorry if your offended but dont read, im not making you. DMHG storyline being developed... Twins Blaise Zambini and Mya Zambini but where does Hermione fit in?
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 34 - Words: 67,263 - Reviews: 220 - Updated: 8-26-07 - Published: 2-12-05​

67k words and storyline being developed still? That's a hell of a lot of filler.

Edit: Epic lulz at the latest review on that.

Draco's such a meanie =(

 

Aye, annoying parasites to fandom they may be, but you just have to love them for their lulzy comments.

 

A fake meanie. It's all an act.

 

How does one rape oneself?

 

Multiple personality disorder and a dildo with no lube.