This is the best story EVAR » by Cocksucker32123 reviews

This is actually a masturbatory fantasy I had. It's me going to Hogwarts, but instead of fighting Dark Lords, reading books and acting like the world's biggest cunt, I fuck Hermione, Luna, Susan and Daphne. Ginny is not in it; transsexual fangirls deserve to die a painful death at the end of Grawp's six-foot prick. Is much, much more awesome than summary. Also, after chapter 1, I start fucking Tonks as well.
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: NC17 - English - Smut/Humour - Chapters: 553 - Words: Over NINE THOUSAND!!! - Reviews: 2x10^3 - Updated: 6-16-08 - Published: 6-16-08

Could I resist? Not on your life.

 

That last one... I thought "Fitzwilliam" was going to be the worst part - then Sirius Black, Vampire King? Soulmate to a demon. That's worse than bestiality.

 

Read the reviews for it, apparently the fangirls love it...

Wow, it's everything I hate about fangirls condensed into one paragraph... She even got a "squee!" in.

 

Even seeing that particular sound written makes me twitchy. And homicidal...

 

Hey, I wrote a review for this last time it was posted here saying that the idea of a kid being romantically involved with a dead older man was gross. Looks like it was deleted. little bitch couldn't take the heat I guess.

 

Gotta love that, if anything should be taken down it's the damned story.

 

Fitzwilliam...

wtf??

Soulmate to Sirius Black, the Vampire King.

double wtf??

It's the sign of lack of creativity if people use HPverse to write their own... stories... Whatever you call them...

 

Fail. The summery isn't as bad as the others in some ways but its still fail.

To be honest, most of whats on ff.net's front page can be put here...

 

That's almost a gem:

Can I Have Your Autogrpah by firefairydog91 reviews

My name is Harry Potter;I have no idea who this Daniel Radcliffe person is." The Trio use a broken protkey and Rueprt, Dan, and Emma learn its not all pretend. Ron/hermione Rupet/Harry Dan/Harry Hermione/Dan rupert/Ron Let me know what you think.
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: M - English - Action/Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 413 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 6-21-08 - Published: 6-21-08
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Wow. HOW many ways are there to misspell "Rupert?"

Edited to add:
Actors have a reputation for being sluts, but that's pretty impressive: they only had 400 words to do all that bed-hopping.

 

The Doctor's first post in this thread... I see what you did there. Clever use of the search engine.

 

7. Dark Prodigyby Tridentwatch reviews
Over 80 chapters planned! After being privately trained for ten years, Harry gets a letter of acceptance to Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry. Dark!Harry: Animagus form and Pairings to be decided.
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 35,191 - Reviews: 77 - Updated: 6-21-08 - Published: 7-14-07

Chose this because of the final sentence.
Pisses me off when an author clearly doesn't know what direction of the fic is.

Oh and the animagus form shit,
and 'privately trained'
and the whole cliche nature.

 

Lol. Trident is still trying. What a fag.

 

If I ever write an animagus!Harry fic, I'll set it at least two years post-War, and I'll have him have been a recluse suffering from PTSD to justify the time and effort.

 

That could work.

 

Lol privately trained since he was one? WTF

 

Laugh all you want. He's been raised to be the ultimate warrior. He has four magical animagus forms and is heir to all Four Founders, he's got wolverine claws and and and....

 

By planned do ya reckon he means plagiarized off another author?

 

One? The summary contains so many clichés that the fic looks like a patchwork ripped off of a dozen stories.

 

Best story ever... By the way he is seven when he says this.