I'm imagining Tourettes-Guy in the potions classroom suddenly screaming out, "SHIT! GOD-DAMNIT COCKSUCKERMOTHERFUCKER SHIT!" and half the students fucking up their potions from the surprise.

Although, now I wanna read a Tourettes-Guy!Harry fic.

 

What the fu... I don't even....

 

This summary is full of win.

 

What the fu... I don't even.... [/QUOTE]
Read the story, I call it awesomely deceptive.

 

Deceptive, yes. Good? No.

It sounds so simple when you put it like that...

 

Wait, is that in any way deviating from canon? It seems pretty much what Rowling wrote to me.

 

Do these people not hurt when they write this stuff? I mean Jesus they're the first people to read it.

 

Rowling didn't have house-elves shaving Harry's pubes and giving him an enema in preparation for Voldemort's date-rape. As far as I recall, anyway.

Presumably they write it because they enjoy it. Which is scary in itself, to be honest. In defence of the story I posted, the actual writing isn't bad. The content though...

 

Ow. Ow ow ow; it hurt my psyche just to read that, so fuck you very much for that mind-warping little image.

 

I find it easier to survive such posts by using Dr. Evil's voice for re-reading it in my head.

'There's nothing quite like a shaved scrotum. It's breathtaking. Really. You should try it.'

 

Apologies for double-posting, but today was a red-letter inanity day.


Right Of Caste » by strangeseraph reviews Slash. Harry Potter infiltrates a Dark revel disguised as Lucius Malfoy's nephew, in order to destroy Voldemort once and for all. But somebody is onto his disguise, and Voldemort has plans of his own for Harry. Post-HBP, ignores DH. Harry/VoldemortRated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 19 - Words: 71,213 - Reviews: 278 - Updated: 3-19-10 - Published: 5-12-08 - Harry P. & Voldemort - Complete

Good Plan! Let's do that!


Amor Caecus Est by InxDarknessxox AU. "Listen and listen well, Gaunt. I will not allow you to take my child from me!" Lily shrieked. Tom tutted. "My dear, sweet sister...I won’t take him from you as long as you keep that mouth of yours shut! Otherwise..." HP/OC HP!Incest Slytherin!HarryRated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,636 - Published: 3-19-10 - Harry P. & Voldemort

"... otherwise I'll find something inappropriate to stick into it?"



Hidden » by Dramonie and Sirius Rock reviews Harry and his friends return to Hogwarts for there 6th year were quickley people discover what was once never there. The now 16 year old wizards hide many things such as fellings, friends, and lovers. You'll never guess who is hiding what! T for launguag.Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 42,208 - Reviews: 36 - Updated: 3-19-10 - Published: 2-20-10 - Hermione G. & Draco M.

Latest chapter includes this gem:
Before any one could answer Professor McGonagall's voice issued threw out the entire train 5 times louder than normal. "All students listen closely as I give you your instructions for your decent up to the castle"

I know Potterverse physics is more of a tradition than actual laws of movement, but... descend up?


Too Much Love Will Kill You » by Delilah Kelley reviews AU. Voldemort is after a young blind girl endowed with special magical powers. Severus is on a mission to protect her – whatever the cost to his soul. Will he gain love and redemption in the process ? ADULT THEMES and CONTENT, you’ve been warned. WIPRated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 127 - Words: 489,484 - Reviews: 154 - Updated: 3-19-10 - Published: 11-25-09 - Severus S. & OC

This could be an epic story of true merit but I'm reading the title saying to myself 'Yes, please little blind girl; love him too much as quickly as you can. It will be better for all involved.' Half a million words later I'm pretty sure she's taking her time.

 

EDIT: And another one

Yeah, I agree with the rating. Little kids would be frightened by that kind of... err... launguag.

 

Misspelled words in Bold Red. I find it particularly amusing that a fan of Draco/Hermione misspelled the 'ship name in their username. Then again, I've always had trouble hiding my fellings; I wish they were once never there.

Fucking retard average American [/shame]

Did you intentionally miss that the moron wrote "decent" instead of the still-stupid "descent" when her voice issued "threw out" the train?

 

There was so much wrong with it that I couldn't help leaving it in its 'natural' state. The description also included a warning for 'launguag.' (oh wait; you caught that one- still the irony entertains)

Yet still; mis-spellings are one thing but I never considered 'descend' to be a difficult concept to grasp.
"Y'wanna fall up the hill, Harry?"
"Sure Luna, if only for the challenge!"

 

Did you read any of the reviews?...I'm not quite sure I'm comfortable with the idea that there are people that ....are that...I didn't read the story, just the reviews....wow

 

I just read some of the reviews. What the fuck is a "Glomp"? And why exactly are Harry and James brothers, instead of father and son?

 

Lol, thanks for the info man.

 

This is amazing. David Chapelle could not wring a laugh like this from me.

 

I didn't know if this belonged here or in with the WTF fics... I'm really can't make myself click it and find out.

EDIT: Never mind. I did end up clicking it. It wasn't lulzy at all, just fucking retarded.