He killed Dobby and Hermione, that kinda gives it a +1.

 

Harry's fuck up with runes, enchanced testosterone and all that? He is going to become Noodlehammer's Naruto, only weaker...and british I guess. Not that I'm complaining, I quite liked his stories, and if you are able to ignore the masturbatory tendencies as you said, he can tell a pretty good story with a solid plot.

However, as I said before, I'm unsure if it will be most of DLPer's cup of tea. There are plenty of common Pet Peeves that will likely unsettle some, especially his decision to move up the timeline by two decades.

 

I tell myself that at least he is not fucking up the 90s'.

 

I don't know if I like this, and i's very confusing. On one hand it has some interesting plot points that could progress nicely, but other points are dealt with almost for the sake of it. 3/5 for now, until the writing focuses more and we can an idea where this story is going, so that I can forgive the other cliches and bad characterisations.

 

Jon already noted most of the story flaws. It falls for many of the clichés and has some elements of character bashing. The interesting concepts were very abrupt and never fleshed out. The author needs to show, not tell, the story.

2/5.

Spoiler

The story starts off with a time-skip with baby Harry being left with the Dursleys on November 1st, 2001. There doesn’t seem to be any implications or reason for this. However, the author might have some plans for future chapters.

Throughout the story, the author explains the characters' motives. The author tells that the Shaws, the family who adopts Harry, wants Harry as a status son. The author tells the readers that Harry feels a certain emotion or learns to feel a certain way due to a previous action. The whole story reads like a book report. The author interprets everything for the reader and this may be the reason why certain characters, most notably Snape, seem completely dislikable.

There are some interesting moments that could make this story very good with major editing. Hermione’s death is a very interesting concept as she is instrumental in shaping canon Harry. The author does a good job in reaching the obvious implications of Hermione’s death: the lack of interest in the Philosopher’s Stone. However, the author fails to flesh out the consequences of these changes.

Another interesting moment was when Harry gives Snape a Muggle notebook and pen for a Christmas gift. Snape realizes that this passive aggressive gift was something Lily would do, and Snape spends the Christmas morning thinking of Lily. This added a dimension to Lily, Harry, and Snape’s character. This could have been a beautiful turning point but it was very rushed and thus, had no emotional impact.

The author really needs to slow things down and fully explore some of the interesting concepts he has.

 

2/5

I normally wouldn't rate after only one chapters but it was 10k+ words. Everything wrong with it has already said except I don't think the positives have any chance of outweighing the clichés.

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The second chapter is no improvement.

 

Maybe if this is a hit he'll do a crossover with both characters.
As everyone has already said this is a guilty pleasure and I think it deserves a 3/5 from me. Maybe if we are lucky the golden trio will be Harry, Luna, and Ginny that seems like a new trick to me.

 

I haven't read any of Noodlehammer's other work so maybe I'm missing something but I'm having a lot of difficulty getting into this story.

Ignoring the massive issue that is Harry's miraculous wandless magic (wandless transfiguration... really?) that seems to be leading to the inevitable super Harry, the biggest problem I'm having with this story so far is not that Harry is ridiculously OOC as Jon suggested, but rather the complete lack of character that sums up Harry so far. I'm hoping that when we actually get to see some character interactions we might get a better feeling for Harry, but the introduction of Luna and Ginny immediately after the rune accident has left me wondering if the extent of Harry's relationships will be his future Harem + Snape.

I have to agree, so far this reads less like a story than some sort of lifeless after action report.

 

This is written from the author of Reaching for a Dream. Nuff said... terribad

 

1/5
Read chapter 1 which was filled with cliches after an AN saying they will be avoided...

 

The naruto story of this auther has been a long guilty pleasure of mine.
This new story will be the same I think. Stupid yet fun.
3/5 with the potential to become more.

 

Most of the flaws in this story have already been pointed out. The entire first chapter is a string of overused clichés. Harry as a character lacks something deeper, all I see up until now is him showing contempt for everything around him. In the second chapter he misses out on a chance to draw the reader in further. He kills off Hermione, but goes over it so quickly that it misses all effect. The author should have taken the chance to set his - rather cliché - story aside from all the other cliché stories, but he missed out.

Cleary, he is setting up Harry to be some kind of Super. While I'm never a big fan of Harry just being a genius for no apparant reason (the wandless magic as an eleven-year-old jumps to mind), the background of Harry being studious and a Ravenclaw, does offer some potential.

The upside is that author isn't a bad writer per se. I think that if he would take the time to go more in depth, this story can become more interesting. 2/5 for now.

 

The constant mentions of "it felt like the beginning of a quest in an RPG" completely ruined the story for me. It felt like the author himself was pointing out how stupid half his plot is to ensure no readers overlooked it.

2/5 because honestly it was quite readable if not for that.

 

I liked Noodlehammer's Naruto fic, even the Sekirei sequel to a point. But reading his HP fic, it's painfully obvious that his style worked much, much better for Naruto. I feel like I want to like this fic, but it has so many things I dislike. I can read about a super, world stomping Naruto brainlessly easily enough, but that's impossible for HP. It's also likely that the author doesn't have the depth of experience and cliche aversion to HP that most of the older readers here do.

There are a lot of cliches. Some he does explain properly, much better than most authors, but others just make me go "no no no". His style of writing the fic, the way he's chosen to make Harry overly gifted in wandless magic, his prissiness about Hogwarts food, his progressive muggle attitude, they all just rub the me wrong way. It doesn't feel like a HP fic I'd enjoy, but I want to keep reading nonetheless.

A conflicted 3/5 that'll probably end up on my favoites list anyways.

I actually liked the third chapter a lot more than the first. The first was all about the cliches. The third was the author showing the direction he's taking the story. At least it's fairly unique, I though the rune thing was fine, honestly, considering my experience with the author.

 

A guilty pleasure at best. I was holding out hope that the story would turn out decently until the

Spoiler

rune power up scenes resulting in "enhanced masculinity". Then again the rune power up in and of itself should have been a glaring warning sign.

 

I got through the first chapter, but didn't continue after that. Some bits of it perfectly readable, and I could see a way the fic was headed that I could enjoy.

But then there'd be something that would totally jar me out of it, whether it was ridiculous out of characterness (not that the character wasn't as in canon, but wasn't remotely near acting as an 11 year old would), or the repeated references to computer games. It broke the immersion over and over for me.

2/5

 

Yeah, this embodies a guilty pleasure fic. Goes from great to barely readable at times.

Highlights being Harry's time at school and grasp of magic.

Lowlights being the rituals and all the bad consequences after.

3/5

 

3/5

It feels disingenuous to wizards who spend their entire lives training to master a particular skill such as occlumency to have it completed in a day via 'rune writing'. I feel the drawbacks certainly don't outweigh the enormous gains made.

That being said the writing is generally solid and the plot is taking interesting turns.