You bumped this thread for that useless, unimaginative, utterly useless shit you would wish to call a flame? Lord, I've seen fangirls burn better than that; I've seen cow-pies with more originality. That is even stupider then half the authors that write the shit you are reviewing for.

Firstly, how the fuck do you generalize a review? Sure, most of the stories have relatively the same plot, use the same cliches, and yes even have the same characters. But even still, every story is unique, it doesn't matter how shitty it is, unless it is a copy/paste there is something in there that belongs uniquely to the author.

Sure, a lot of the things you described in your review will be in most stories, but what about the rest of them? Every story that you read doesn't have the same plot-line, characters, problems. (I pray you don't read the same shit over, and over anyway.)

Secondly, the idea of a flame is not only to bash, but to criticize. Your pitiful "flame" doesn't do either.

Finally, have you even read what you put down? In your 'attempt' to bash other would-be authors, you make yourself look like a complete and utter moron. In your 'attempt' to make yourself look like a smartie-poo you make it seem you haven't even read what you are posting that for. Some may be able to pull that off, (Vash) but I highly doubt you have the skills.

You cannot generalize flames, and criticisms; it just isn't possible. Flames are supposed to be unique, targeting the author alone and making him/her seem like a moron. This 'flame' that I hope you haven't started to post, makes you look more of a moron than anyone else.

-Void

P.S. Yes, if I were you, I too would hope Tinn would come clean up the shit you would make by posting that. If I was her, I would be pissed to say the least that some n00b-nobody was doing nothing less than insulting her.

If you post like that, you have no reason to even be around the fandom, get the fuck out while you can; we honestly don't need you.

 

scionof <unpronounceable Japanese name I don't give a shit about>, the knowledge that you exist is a burden on your own soul. Not even mine, or Void's, but your own.

Even the most stalwart of fucking retards you "flame" would be insulted by the sheer supidity present in such abundance.

You gotta be biting. It if takes you 50+ lines to do a flame, the targeted author will shrug, smirk, and move on.

 

The best part is if you look back a few pages, he has almost the same review posted in February of 2007. Nothing wrong with recycling them, but exercise a little creativity.

 

Oh look, Andromalius bandwagoned another thread! Like in his newbie days, isn't it so cute?

Aw, so biting! How could he ever look at himself in a mirror after reading such a clever, refined, funny, and scathing insult! You must have crushed his ego into nothingness!

Yeah, that's sarcasm.

There are two categories of flames, the "short-and-to-the-point" ones, often entertaining, but where there isn't any criticising to be done; and the long ones that are meant to insult the author, criticise their story, and eventually provide entertainment. Best flames I've ever read were thousands of words long. The flames I give are always thousands of words long, and the response I got suggested that the author didn't merely "shrug, smirk and move on".

Try again.

________________

Void: you have a couple of good points, although I didn't think many flamers did the "criticising" aspect (but I agree, those flames are the best). Take it easy though -- Kyuubi's flame isn't extraordinary, but it has a few good lines and I like the concept. Should he adapt it to a particular story, it could actually be rather funny. Not sure it called for such vehemence in any case.

Lol -- he's an older member than me. And about that "target practice" line... meh.

________________

Swimdraconian: I knew I had already seen something like that somewhere. Just couldn't be bothered to check the rest of the thread again. Laziness is an awesome thing.

 

It was more of the "Bumped. Deal with it." that irked me. It was superficial attempt at channeling the sarcastic-archtype with flagrant disregard for others' opinions. However, the effort was clearly visible, so I didn't see any reason to stint on criticism just because someone else already did it. The flame itself, however much you liked it, didn't redeem it.

I took it for granted that a warm flame, regardless of its length, maintains a level of sting, something that scionofweiortr failed at. For every good moment in scion's flame, there's something that the recipient of the flame would be indifferent to. The end result is that the author thinks "It could be worse."

I suppose you've won that argument, strictly speaking, but to be honest, only by virtue of having written multi-thousand word flames. Reviews I've seen that long, but I've not yet come across flames anywhere near that length.

Edit: The concept of a flame being flamed is interesting.

 

Problem is, except for your insult at the beginning (which, allow me to reiterate, was lamer than much of what scionofkyuubi came up with) the only point you raised was the "a flame's gotta be short" one. Had you taken one glance at the first pages of the thread, you'd have seen most of the flames posted were rather long (even without counting mine -- I can't make it short anyway, whether it is a review, a flame, a chapter or a summary, so I'm a bad example) so you were, in fact, more off-topic than anything else.

A virulent post is fine, as long as you're not wrong. Adding your two cents is fine, as long as you actually add something to the discussion. Hence my post.

Have a few links.

Only one of them (the third) is from me. The last one, rather short, is an example of how a generalised flame can actually be quite good when well-done (although even then I'm not too fond of the principle).

Very. There's a flamefest somewhere in this thread about a flame.

 

Hm. Remind me to get the popcorn if y'all ever have a flame war. I want to watch and enjoy. I've flamed people before and been involved in flame wars, but they weren't amusing at all. They were bitter, hard fought things and I wouldn't repeat the experiences for anything.

 

I wasn't attempting to be funny or sarcastic. I'm just a rude asshole, and I don't really care. I rarely post, and that's simply because most of what I'd say is already out there, no need to rehash it. I just stuck that out there because I meant to put that together a while ago. Read the previous post I adapted it from, and you'll read that I intended to adapt it for HP. Void, I'm not sure what crawled up your ass and died, but again, since I don't care...

Anyways, yeah. I'm not going to start a flame war. I'm too lazy. I spend most all of my time on this site in the IRC or Library, and I just don't post much. I'm a lurker, but only because most say what I think better than I do. I've been here longer than most, and I'm not scared to piss on your territory. Andromalius, if you're going to insult me, try harder next time. I barely felt that one.

 

No Your Momma!

 

Oh yeah, your "flame" really shows this, let me tell you. (/sarcasm)

Yes, I can agree, it would be hard to post when those that are better than you do it before you. Just follow a long like a good little puppy looking for scraps.

I seem to recall you posting pretty much the same thing earlier...

Like I stated before, you can't "generalize" a flame. Get over it, end of story.

Wow, a scathing comment, the likes of which I will feel for life, let me tell you. (/sarcasm)

Don't forget stupid, I'm pretty sure you forgot.

Why repeat what you have already covered just a paragraph previously?

Yes, but apparently you are too scared to leave a sign that says it was you whom did the pissing.

Touch me once...shame on you. Touch me twice...

Bratling, you don't look to sharp either. Might I just invite you to check the forums pretty much anywhere? You'll find flames everywhere, hell, check the "Hall of Shame".

 

Not to interrupt your E-Peen show and tell but I just wanted to know;

Andro, you can't pronounce Kyuubi?

Oh and he was told to Add 'Bump. Deal with it' by some of the higher ups on IRC.

 

Lol, higher ups on IRC.

Sorry for my irrelevant interruption, please continue your cock-fencing.

 

Have a nice day.

 

DLP Hierarchy lol

Higher ups! You mean mods? Or people who's name starts with A?

 

Oh shit, oh shit. I'm so sorry sonofkyuubi! I'll... I'll suck your dick. Let me show you the reason the little children down the street call me the Dark Vortex.

Since I'm writing a Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles crossover, I might as well get some more practice in. Your future is so disheartening that your future self will travel back in time to murder you.

The only anime I've ever liked was Metropolis. And Paprika.

 

Really? No thanks. Here I thought they called you that because your brain resembled a black hole: swirling, inescapable and completely devoid of life.

 

For someone who didn't want to start a flame war, you're doing pretty well...

By all means, proceed. At least it's entertaining.

-idly munches some popcorn-

 

I said I didn't want to start one. I said nothing about finishing one.

 

Jesus, where's Dark Lord Rostam when you need him?

 

*reaches for the popcorn*