No.

Just no.

 

Harry goes to Gringgotss, discovers his secret ancestry and a truckload of dough, assimilates all of Moldyshorts memories, adds several barely legal girls to his slave harem, gets the staff of Mrelin, crowns of the Seven Kings and the Rods of the Five Wizards...

'Nough said...

 

Stop it

Its no longer funny

 

From the rarity of Occlumency books I can see that you are indeed correct.

 

From the rarity of Occulmency books we can assume that the use of the word "Moldyshorts" should be punishable by crucifixion.

 

Rhetorical devices! Even when announced you confuse people!

How dreadful it is to be you!

 

From the rarity of Occlumency books I conclude you're all idiots.

 

For the continued rarity of Occlumency books...

 

Fuck the damn Occlumency books.

 

Seriously stop it. You guys are killing the only funny joke Taure has ever made. Stop being so cruel

 

I could have swore there was a thread around about 2 weeks ago before I left that had more chapters than what was released on fanfiction.net, can't seem to find it now.

 

It's in the Work By Author section. link to thread

 

So I just finished reading this. Criticism aside, I rather enjoyed it. I did not scroll through it too often, nor did I roll my eyes. Like all things hyped on here, I do not see it being the end-all-be-all, however.

It has its flaws and strengths like all things.

I like the characters, Harry especially. I think he is a very talented prodigy mirrored by Nathan's actions in Hogwarts. I think it is a bit too convenient how is learning things just to get better, kind of like how the author is having him learn stuff so to highlight how awesome he is instead of Harry just trying to improve. At least it felt that way to me. This was apparent in the Occlumency part especially.

Krum is good. Not stupid, just would rather be flying than studying. His struggles and personality have been highlighted wonderfully. Acts his age too around his GF. Would even call him a gentleman in that regard. Though, I wish he would pick a better one. Yeesh, I wish she had more depth than just token-bitch, considering how often I have to read her.

Calypso is definitely a great OC. If all her and her father's secrets are designed solely get Harry into a relationship, or something related, I will be infinitely disappointed. There is a lot of ground work laid out there, and the taste of a burgeoning romance, I just hope it does not take center stage.

All other characters are two-dimensional and either ripped from stereotypes, Mother figure, or cast straight from Canon. Though, Dumbledore did have that poignant moment with the book. Snape is handled pretty well, though. Still seems a tad off, maybe because his bitterness has been cooled with Lily in his life.

The plot. I struggled for a while finding out what it was. It was at first just Harry going to school and finding his place and being awesome. Man I was getting tired of it for a spell, but realized just how much I enjoyed the details of the magic explained and used. Building upon Canon, I can't help but think how much I would have enjoyed the books more had there been this much detail in them. I thought the descriptions of the spells great, and that, beyond anything, is what drove me to keep reading.

There is little tension, foreshadowing(lest I am missing something with Rosier's), beyond a little drama over Calypso. Which is the standard Romeo and Juliet vibes, just without the great prose. That being said, I cannot help but like the parallels being drawn with Grindelwald. Really. It makes me think that he can go dark. Maybe. Hopefully? Can't say, but I would love to this child, afraid to cast the unforgivables, blushing at being embarrassed by adults, fall.

Speaking of which, for the most part they are children. So hard for many to pull off. They still talked a little bit too grown at times, especially in the earlier chapters, but it was not hard too look over that.

I like how Nathan has his own awesome moments as well, giving credit to Canon. In fact, sans attempt at trying to kill Harry, the whole story feels like canon. Thing is, I wish there were some dastardly plot after Harry, besides the romance vibes and some upper classman trying to harm him. It would make it a lot more of an interesting read.

It LOOKS like there are moments of subtle foreshadowing throughout the whole thing, but going by the writer's ability with words, I have my doubts. His creativity and thought are damn amazing. I think a slower build-up in some of the years is needed, considering the pacing. It seems Harry is learning this stuff TOO fast, but in fact it is the pacing giving me this impression. Months pass between each scene. I can't complain really, since the first few years are going by thankfully quickly.

I'm just hoping soon something major will happen because another year of Harry being awesome and learning new things and everyone being impressed would be too much for me. This, I think, is foreshadowing, preparing Harry for what is to come. At least, that is the way it feels. I'm not sure, I could just be hoping. However, I get the sinking suspicion that something very bad is poised to happen around the corner. I think it will start with the end of year 4. (I could be wrong.)

The writing itself is decent, if nothing stellar.

In dialogue when a character responds with something sarcastic, it's better to emphasis a word with italics, than plainly state, she said sarcastically. Small things like this and other foibles, plainly saying something for instance. "He went to his desk and read a letter. Earlier that day..." Is how a lot of scenes start out, necessary as the scenes cover a lot of time, but there are better ways of writing it.

The writing is one thing that has stayed fairly static throughout the story, and something I would love to see the author improve upon.

So....

I liked it, it has its foibles, but it was still a decent read. For what is there, a 3/5. Because, so far the only thing that has happened is Harry going to school and learning magic, which while interesting, is not what a good story should be centered solely on.

That said, if something happens besides Harry learning magic and bitching about his brother, this'll jump up to a easy 4/5, the only thing that would keep it from a 5/5 would be the writing at that point.

EDIT: Important note. Reading the summary of a story can be foreshadowing in itself.

So he will fall. Interesting. If handled well, I'd give this a 5/5 just for turning a good-child into a Dark Lord. This also ramps up my belief that something pretty horrible is just around the bend. Hopefully, it won't take a year to reach that. (I'm wondering if this will pan-out like Canon, with Nathan as Harry, only to have Harry, after he travels the globe, become the next Dark Lord, which will end up with brother against brother.) If so, rather ambitious, hope not, though. Would be a very long wait.

 

I think a large part of the story's appeal is its scope. Going from child to teen to adult is quite an undertaking. The writing is solid, methinks, but that's not the draw for me. The pacing, plotting, and characters are what draws me. The creative ideas throughout the story are a big draw as well.

 

I'm far from one to fap over a specific story (apart from Scaryisn'tit's) or give praise where it isn't quite deserved, but if you honestly believed that this story as it is at the moment is 3/5 then you're retarded.

Not that hard to believe considering your track record of wtf posts. It seems like a case of, "Hmm, if I give this a very detailed review and come off as not being overly impressed I'll look cool and smart 8D."

There are far worse stories than this which garner a 3/5. :facepalm

 

I'm not really sure of 789's "history" but his post definitely made sense to me as the story is up till now pretty bland - albeit with good writing/characterizations. I do not really understand the hundred + pages of adultation for it because up till now it's just the main character getting more awesome.

There aren't really any main plots going on at this point, it's pretty much Harry learning and his relationship with Krum and Calypso.

It honestly doesn't seem to me as a "way to look cool and smart" because all of his points were pretty valid.

That said I don't think this story deserves a 3/5 but it definitely is not a solid 5.

 

No story is perfect (well, maybe The stalking blood sack deserves a 6/5), and though this has a few flaws, I firmly believe this deserves a 5/5 rating. The sheer scale of the work and details, plot and the characters themselves continue to impress the hell out of me.

Harry/Kira FTW.

 

Santi's story is simply well written and has an engaging plot. There are some (or many) pieces to adjust or better, but overall it is extraordinary.

If you're picky it could rate a 4, for the occasional blatant import (Mr. Polansky COME ON) or other fanfiction foible Santi likes to poke fun at, but overall it is well over average fanfiction quality.

This is singularly THE best Dark OC (AU) Harry fic, and that's that.

 

Updated in WbA.

 

Heart woes! So romantic.

Seriously, a mushy update that forwards the contract plot and burns all the Kira&Harry shippers (can we even call them that?). Very little Krum in this one.

Wonder what the detention will be?