How in any way does that make her more tolerable? If someone is acting like an asshole, they're an asshole whether they're intelligent or not. That kind of rivalry makes her like Malfoy, i.e. they will not be able to coexist because they will be trying to one-up each other out of hatred.

 

From what little we know of her, the intelligence she has can breed into respect later on. We've seen one small scene of her so far and her personality doesn't really differ from this Harry's all that much. They both value school, their pride is easily stung, and they're both arrogant.

It's more tolerable for me because at least if they starting feuding later on it won't only consist of...

"Your mother/friend/aunt/monkey's uncle is a mudblood!"

"How dare you say that you Slytherin git!"

..followed by some pathetic punch or low-level curse. I'm hoping from what little we've seen of her so far, that she'll either turn into a useful ally or a formidable opponent. I really don't see either of them unable to coexist in the same school though just because there would be a rivalry going on.

 

I like it, but I find your Harry sort of a boring character, to be honest. Other than his pretty random drive to be a good wizard there doesn't seem to be anything to him.

 

It's better, much better and I liked too the scene with the older boys actually harassing the half-blood. Perhaps you overused "your betters" in the span of a few sentences, but otherwise it was good.
Maybe Harry didn't react strong enough to hearing anyone call his mother a whore, but that is hardly a big issue.

One more thing is, I dunno but it seems like I might be the only one really bothered by it, those "titles" stating the time passage and the change of scenery.
Adding a short sentence, mentioning that some time has passed or explaining that the character in focus is currently occupying a bed in the hospital wing, are much better ways of moving from scene to scene instead of the lazy way, TV-series type of brake off from scene to another one.

 

I am glad you decided to explain things out instead of summarize. The second time around was much better. You seem to be good at making detailed explanations of situations seem so interesting. Most people have trouble with that and tend to bore people but I always love your explanations better and the second version was much better then your summarized version.

Also I like how you had Victor be good at the Dark Arts it makes him seem more realistic as a choice for the Triwizard Tournament. It is a amazing ability to make characters feel canon-like while still making them fit into a entirely different story.

I don't really have a problem with how you break the scenes.

 

I find myself drawn to this story, though with the pace it's going I feel it'll be a long time before this story is complete.

 

Are you blind?

How are they in any way alike besides aptitude in school? Harry is not vindictive, racist, or fucking annoying enough to do any of the things she just did. She then descends to Malfoy's level with a blood based insult. How is any different from:

It's the same type of insult, except that she's even more pompous and inflated than he was. What she did constitutes almost an outright attack. Tell me, where do you see Harry's "arrogance"? Or any single thing Harry has done that would make him not that much different from her?

Girls come between guys all the time, even ones who've been friends for years. The thought that Harry would put up with this to start a friendship with Viktor when he couldn't even ignore Ron to be with his brother doesn't make sense.

 

To me, the difference is that Viktor isn't going to stand for it. Ron and Hermione tried to run roughshod over Harry any time he wanted to have Nathan's attention and Nathan never really said a word about it. Viktor, in contrast, put the wench in her place immediately.

Krum made two definitive statements in that last scene. 1. Kira has to behave herself in respect to Harry or he will put her in her place. 2. Harry is more important to him the welfare of his quidditch team.

 

Chill out, man. I was only trying to make a point that Victor's girlfriend from what /very little/ we've seen of her doesn't have to constitute another Malfoy. But okay, since you seem to think I'm pulling their similarities from my ass - let's take this nice and slow for you.

Arrogance - Harry

Pride Easily Stung - Harry

I'll look again later maybe if I'm in the mood, but I could have sworn there was a scene where he came across Hermione in the library and she snapped "I'm not helping you with your homework" and so he got all offended and stalked off.

Either way, Harry's not condescending, but I don't see how you can deny him being arrogant. And FWI - studious, arrogant, and an easily stung pride does not equal vindictive, racist, or "fucking annoying".

 

So he jokes with his brother (something pretty much every sibling does, especially brothers), was pissed off when Ron asked if he was actually smart (essentially Ron calling him stupid, enough to make anyone mad), and wanted to know why his brother almost died fighting a troll and then kept him ignorant. That doesn't even come close to silencing someone you haven't even met yet because you don't want to be spoken to by a half-blood. Nor has Harry treated anyone with that much contempt or spite. She, without having even exchanged one word, curses him, insults him repeatedly, and then insults his blood and family by acting like she's more than he deserves. Harry does not even approach this absurd level of self-inflation. Turning someone orange as a joke and then reversing the spell doesn't even come close.

Harry has simply never acted anything like that. Your examples never show Harry doing anything of the sort or anything so beyond reason, so whatever point you're trying to make about them being alike fails, since they really aren't alike at all. There's no reason to treat her as anything other than the annoying swot/enemy that she is.

I know, that's why I can't understand why you described her that way. Her faults aren't just a result of being "studious, arrogant, and having an easily stung pride", they're results of being racist and fucking annoying. She may be studious, arrogant, and have an easily stung pride, but she's vindictive and racist as well. Your traits don't justify what she did, mine do.

@tad2103: Krum can't be there all the time either. He doesn't even know what she was really doing, he only heard the insult.

 

The only scene you pointed that could be related to any kind of arrogance was the one in the train. Still, tell me you wouldn't be annoyed at someone who spent hours talking about sports while you're trying to study( especially if you're a really studious person) and then is rudely interrupted by a girl who just barged in your compartment.

IMO silly prank was silly, and since that kind of stuff is easily reverted with magic, no harm was done. The rest of your quotes regarded nothing but friendly jokes between siblings and family, Nathan & sidekicks accusation of a old friend of his mother( which taught a bit about magic too, didn't he? I do remember a remark from lily about getting some help at teaching Harry from Snape.

Besides, go back and read my rant on the after-troll talk. I think still think Harry should've cursed her in the hall, as she had no business sticking her nose on family matters

Oh and pride easily stung? You do realise that he just spend a very large, and very lonely time in hogwarts right? The only thing he has to show to his parents were his grades, and its completely acceptable for Harry to get defensive about it.

Yea, I hope for more Harry awesomeness in the near future Santi, and good job so far!

Edit: You guys forget that Blood prejudice is pretty big in lots of people in HP universe. From the girl POV, she never wishes to spend time in the same room as a "filthy" half blood, and would be highly pissed off when forced to do so, hence the silencing.

 

I'm not trying to justify her actions. I debated about the fact that they're so similar because I can't comprehend how you find her attitude any more obnoxious than his. They're both assholes and Kira is a bitch, yes, but it's more of a minor annoyance for me this far (AGAIN after one scene where I simply stated I hoped the next update fleshed out her character more) because I'm hoping to see a change. She's got potential - pureblood bitch and all.

She can either be the biggest bitch and motivate Harry further to beat her ass and thus give more growth to his character, become someone that he, and she in turn, grudgingly respects later on, or just be enough for a good action scene later on. I don't really care which.

In the end though, what would be the point of cutting a character that could progress the plot so much better even if she was annoying to you?

Edit:

I don't see it that way. Was he justified in his annoyance toward Ron and the train ride? Sure. Should he have rightfully been worried for his brother after the troll? Of course. Do brothers really interact that way. Yeah. And should he really have been defensive after that shit-filled semester of doubt. Certainly.

Nevertheless, it doesn't change the fact that in all of those scenes he was an ass. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad he was. If he hadn't been his character's personality wouldn't have really matched up with an intelligent and isolated eleven year old, but he's still an arrogant ass.

 

Then you should work on having a sense of proportion.

One's being a minor ass in a fairly well-adjusted manner quite typical of normal people--as you admit here. The other attacks people for daring to say a single word and threatens more for just looking at her. That's not normal or well-adjusted, and frankly borderline psychopathic. What do you fail to comprehend here?

 

Yes, this one is much better than the last. Two things, though:

1) I think that "Ms. Megara" should be "Miss". Doesn't "Ms." mean married, but unchanged surname?

2) Also, I'm not sure what the chapters are like on ff.net, but I think the spells should be in italics. It's not necessary, but it semes more...spell-ish, IMO.

 

Ah, I see. Clearly she was "psychopathic" because she was a bitch in one fucking scene. Well, I've seen the light because that makes so much sense. Now I know that the next time someone threatens someone else because they won't shut the hell up that I clearly should be taking a few steps back because this type of behavior could only be explained by a mental in-balance.

 

Miss or Ms are fine. Miss is generally for girls, meaning those who are under 18. Ms. however is for anyone, irregardless of marital status or age.

 

Good work. How can Krum be not very talented in practical spell casting when he became a champion in the tournmnt?

 

What? Harry hadn't said anything. He asked who she was. This is basic comprehension. Why else would Harry be so angry, and then stunned into silence by Viktor's endorsement? It's because he realizes that Viktor is ignorant to her attitude. Harry was silenced before he could even begin to speak. He wasn't chatting her up or anything, he asked one relevant question and got silenced by someone who was supposed to be taking care of him. Why on earth would Harry settle for that? He ditched his brother because of somebody who was obnoxious but irrefutably incompetent, and now he's going to endure the company of somebody whose petulance and self-opinion fuel such behavior, but who can also mask it when necessary? How can you minimize that by calling Harry an ass? The whole point was that she did all this before she had even spoken to him, on assumed superiority. It's a huge inconsistency to say that Harry would put up with this when he let a few petty 11 year-olds come between him and his brother.