Excellent can't wait any longer for the update Lord Ravenclaw! had me on my knees breaking down every time i came on when there was no new chapter in sight! whats the go with your other story as well?

 

So...... when are you going to update?
I'm really looking towards it. I love all of the fics with Flamel and rare pairings.

 

:shock: You....updated? Dear sweet God...you updated!! Finally!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

Yay Lordy Ravenclaw for updating!

But then again, I just realized, it's been over eleven months since this story had a new chapter, based on my review of chapter six on January 26th. I complimented you on utilizing good old Nicky Flamel, an excellent potential character rarely seen (though since then I've been doing my part to drive him into the ground).

And I can't help but point out that was well over a month before I'd ever considered even trying to write down any fanfic at all. For me, it was the late Mordecai's Honks fic in early March that gave me my first bunny, which naturally span wildly out of control. (/me logs in and checks what I've been doing in between Lordy Ravenclaw's hair-o-tongue updates: Total words archived : 408,564 words. Err... when did that happen?!)

Okay, what I'm getting at is: Yay for the update! Yay for Lord Ravenclaw! But now you've gone and re-whet my appetite for this fic and I don't want the next chapter to come shortly after thanksgiving! Seriously, please! More, more, more!

 

I say, I expect EoH updated my tomorrow, damnit!

Anyways, its good to see this story moving once again. I just hope that even after the holiday break is over to see some good chapters beings posted!

 

hurrah

 

can this day get any better?

 

i wanted to see some more dumble bashing...

 

Good to see this story moving. I look forward to the next chapter.

 

The fight scene turned out great, good work.

 

oh i most deffinately agree with you on that, a work of art Raven...if i wasn't so moral i would of blown my load over it but alas with high spirits i go to call in a favour. :wink:

 

I realized I never properly reviewed this story before, so here it is.

I must say that the beggining wasn't very good.

Harry simply grows too powerful, smart & knowledgable too fast - I really don't see how more magical power would turn him into a transfiguration master and seasoned architect, or infuse him with advanced magical knowledge about wards and such...

The whole beggining seems a bit rushed actually. New concepts, gadgets and characters are introduced too quickly, so most of them remain under-developed and unused. That is really a shame, coz there are some truly great ideas there (like that house spirit, for example).

Also your duels, while nicely written, seemed rather artificialy implemented - it's like you needed some action and decided to throw in some DE's so you could show off Harry's new powers. I mean, your DE's break through the Private Drive wards without any explanation how they do it (it's supposed to be impossible, remember?), or attack Diagon Alley for no reason at all except to torture random people (not to mention they do it exactly when Harry is around there to stop them)... Harry then kills them & uses unforgiveables in front of witnesses and what? ... No trial, no hearing, no investigation, nothing... Once the action scene is done, the corpses dissapear and Harry is ready for a new adventure, like in some action video game. Yes, this is done all the times by other FF authors, but it's still a bad plot device in my oppinion.

... whell, that was the first part of the story.

The last 3-4 chapters are much better. I like Harry apprenticing under Flammel, I liked that hilarious prank, I like how Ginny reacted (although Ron & Hermione's reactions were unrealistic and over the top), I like your duels and magical theory and finally I liked that whole thing with Gryffindor infusion field - you should have done something like that from the beggining, instead of making Harry smarter overnight for no reason at all (yes, yes, magic is explanation for all, but still)... I can actually see a lot of pottential in that idea (like some other studens being under it too - one of the Patil twin, Neville, Luna, Crabble & Goyle... or Harry moving these fields to Slytherin students... could be a riot).

To conclude, this story is going in the right direction, but the first several chapters will keep dragging it down (unless you rewrite them completely). I still prefer your other story, which is much more original in my oppinion, but this one is turning out quite enjoyable too.

 

Oh don't worry I'll smack you around some more, you will keep churning these out damn you.

 

Write, or we'll drop you in the flaming hells of the realm of the H/G fangirls from our loft in DLP heaven.

Otherwise, excellent chapter, Raven.