Title: Harry Potter and the Orb of Slytherin
Author: mcjazzman32
Rating: K+
Genre: Fantasy/Romance
Pairings: Going towards H/Hr
Chapters: 25
Words: 154,545
Updated: July 7, 2006
Published: June 8, 2006
Status: Complete
Summary: The world hangs on the courage of one person: Harry Potter. In a struggle between two different kinds of magic, that of love and hate, Harry must find the will to overcome the Evil One. Pumpkin Pie Unite!
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2981695/1/

Well, this is probably the best canon-friendly 'scavenger hunt' post-HBP story I've seen so far. Of course, the best from this bunch should hardly be allowed to lick dirt off any average post-OOTP Independent!Harry story's shoes, but if you can stand JKR's vision of how the magical "war" should be fought and won, this is indeed a very good read.

Upsides include Harry becoming smarter and more powerful, learning dark magic, getting a snake and ditching Ron & Hermione (at least for a while). Love-potion!Ginny plot is an additional brownie point (but no bashing, I'm afraid).

Downsides include all the mushy bullshit that HBP had unfortunately left us with - best friends forever crap to the highest extent, power of love, gay war (good VS evil, turn the other cheek crap), Harry the mental pussy (wallowing in misery all the time, feeling guilty that his immune system is killing innocent bacteria etc...), and of course, super!Weasleys, the best family in the whole wide world, with Harry as their sniveling 8th son (because Percy didn't turn Death Eater as he should have, but returned into the family, where the fat cow pressed him into her tits and forgiven him).

So, if you're up to reading an extremely well written IN-CANON post-HBP story, with some cool dark elements, go ahead, Orb of Slytherin is probably the best one yet.



Checked by Minion, Nov. 23, 2012

 

Oh man, the mushiness is really bad. I would add the time-jumps to your list of downsides. The first couple of chapters were particularly annoying. She went from July 1st, to 9th, to 8th, to Dec. 23 and then back to July 24th. I almost stopped reading but I wanted to get to the dark magic

Overall it's not too bad, but there are many small things that ruin the atmosphere. For example, Luna is too rational, the snake can apparently read Bulgarian...

I'd say that if one can manage to go past the first 6-7 chapters, then the story picks up (basically we get to the cool stuff )

 

I just couldn't get part the second chapter. Can't say too much about the time jumps as I employed them in my story as well but the whole angsty mood Harry was settling in kind of blew me off. Maybe I'll try reading this fic again on a rainy day when there is absolutely nothing else on the web to read.

 

I thought the story was unrealistic. Slytherin would of died from malnutrition or starvation and would be wondering the world as a soul like Voldemort. He should of been dead at the very least and his soul should of been trapped in the barrier.

Major plot hole if I ever saw one. Why would Gryfindor find the Chamber and not seal it with his own magic and why would Tom Riddle not take the staff with him in like 1945? That in itself made me think the author's writing is on the fly and unprepared for future chapters, as they don't coincide with eachother. The book of slytherin was a great idea, but some of the ideas are a bit Cliche with Harry curing the longbottoms and the whole deal with him being ubber powerful within a month out of hogwarts.

Harry is also a bit of a bitch with him crying all the time maybe i'm unemotional, but the only time i cry is when something makes my eyes water like a peice of wood stuck in there or something. I honestly can't understand why Harry is being such a pussy. He has also declared he is going to destroy voldemort like a dozen times without me exagerating the slightest. He keeps going on and on about how he's going to seek vengance and justice and blah blah. He needs to quit talking and start searching for the Horcruxes. Why the author changed cannon of voldemort not knowing his Horcuxes were being destroyed is stupid plot hole. There is no way anybody would be able to find them if he did know they were being searched and destroyed. All he would have to do is cast a fidelius on 1 of them and he's invincible period, so Vold would not just increase the spells on his little obstacle courses he would take immeidate action.

Harry really needs to ditch Crotch-fire and Bucktooth. They are clearly tag alongs that can't do shit magically. Why would Harry be so forgiving if he was given a love potion, I would bitch slap Ginny for that crap then leave in a fit of anger and not return, hopefully the bitch would kill herself, so Harry can continue being good and have a clear conscious.

Basically Harry needs to stop being EMO about everything besides that there are some very original ideas such as the anamagus tokens, slytherin book, staff, orb ect. The characterisation of Harry made me want to quit reading because he talks and talks and does little about persuing his goals.

 

Riddle probably never figured out how to get the staff.

That's hardly the case, since she's jumping all over the timeline.

It seems Voldemort can feel their destruction only when most of them are already gone (the pain Harry felt when he destroyed the cup).

Fidelius is a spell used to hide other people. There's no indication it can be used to hide inanimate objects. Of course, this confusion is mostly Rowling's fault, since she never explained the functioning of this charm.

I don't see that happening, since the author already forshadowed the ultra super power of luv spell that Godric, Rowena and Helga used against Slytherin (coincidence? hardly).

I agree with everything else stated.

 

I liked it. Harry is a bit whiney but that is the nature of this guys fic. I like the plot and i will continue to read it

 

Actually Vold new about the cup before it was destroyed, and that was the first and only horucrux they destroyed in this story. In the story it doesn't say when RAB destroyed the locket it could of been years ago or it could of been months, my guess is years since vold resurected only like 2 years ago. So basically vold learned of the destruction when exactly? he didn't know in book 6 and nothing changed untill the cup, so why would vold be expecting anything?

 

Because Snape new about the ring that Albus had and the diary. He also most likely new about them going after the locket as well. As for what changed Tom go his body back and was no longer a spirit when Albus destroyed the ring and there is no way of knowing if Tom did or did not feel the ring being destroyed because we don't know how the destruction of the souls really take place. CoS doesn't count as Tom's soul was feeding on another human at that time. I wonder though why Tom doesn't just have all of his souls become human. The wizards cannot beat one Tom how could they have ever come close to beating 7. I thought this story was the best story I have read that follows canon after HBP.

 

Hum, about voldemort creating new bodies... well, how are you going to explain to one of your other selves that he has to obey you?

 

Snape, in my opinion, is still on Dumbles side. Many people have sited proof to this. All i'm saying is why would JKR show us that whole seen of Snape taking the unbreakable vow and all that bullshit, when the story is from Harry's perspective not of snapes. If snape was truly on volds side, he wouldn't of needed an unbreakable vow to kill Dumble.

Basically Snape is the inside man that can gather info on Horcurxes and follow volds movements without causing suspicion.

So I don't see this story following cannon, but thats why fanfic is more interesting than cannon because you get many other perspectives of things, even though they may be incorrect.

The only horcrux Vold will actually feel is going to be his snake Nagini since it will be the last destroyed. He will know because he will probably feel his soul is no longer bound to earth. If he learned earlier in book 7, like I said earlier, there is no chance in hell they would be able to defeat him.

 

Hum, about snape, it is a matter of opinion. He could very well be arrogant enough to believe he could play both fields, until one was winning. Beside, the ak is supposedly feeding on hate and wanting the person dead, so...

 

Anybody read the updates, all I'm gonna say is it was pretty rediculous. How can Harry take on like 12 death eaters himself then lose to Hermon? I don't know what the fuck the author is playing at here. They were throwing 1st year spells at eachother, why not use something advanced? He's been away learning with the Death Eater traitor, got a staff making him 10 times more powerful and he can't beat the bitch, focking retarded.

I'm seriously considering not reading this all the way through. Although, i thought the learning the future through the use of 2 magical items was quite different and good way to move the plot forward, but Harry's dependance on bushy and red, makes me want to punch the author in the face with spiked brass knuckles. Why give ron the ability to change into shit, that whole thing being a pure blood is dumb as fuck, especially since Harry is the one that gave them away. Pure bloods don't exist because every wizard or witch came from muggle ancestory at some point.

 

Ah...i have to admit i don't like the trinny charms either. I hate it when people give "pureblood" special powers. Even when it is well done like this. Shrugs. The story is still good though, at least the 15 first chapters. I will tell you what I think of the last one.

 

Actually, I like the Trinny charms... And it does make a good deal of sense that past purebloods would make such devices.

 

Those were my thoughts though I didn't mention the pureblood thing in my review because it was quite original and for that reason alone I let it slide. I did rant quite awhile about Harry's loss though. It made no sense. Hermione has always been bad at dueling where as Harry has had training and is naturally gifted at dueling. That is not even mentioning the stupid things Harry let Hermione do. If she can summon a clock why can't he summon it away from her? The author was doing quite well until the last chapter. It just didn't make sense at all and I find myself wondering if it is worth it to continue reading after this.

 

The duel... was ridiculous. While i am not one to say Hermione is bad at dueling- this is a fanon concept-, she has never trained herself to duel yet, so she shouldn't be exeptional. Harry should. What we see is a duel where there is no original thinking, and opportunities are not taken. They both dueled very poorly, and the whole "oh my god they are so strong" was cringe worthy.I was almost tempted to make up a good dueling scene and send it to the author, but...

On the plus side, i have never yet saw a well done duel in fanfiction (liath coming quite close, but still with a few WTF).

 

Err, Hermione IS a bad dueler. Read the DoM scence, she's a major retard.

This story is just meh. It has some good stuff, and some bad stuff, but IMO the bad outweighs the good. Though, not by much.

 

I've lost all respect for this story, just attempt to read the next chapter. I think i might of thrown up a little bit, bad idea to eat before hand.

 

Ah, but "Bad" Implies that she is less good than most others, and, well, in canon, most wizards are sheep when it comes to action. At least Hermione *tried* to fight, which is a major improvement compared to other wizards. If every wizard at the world cup had fought back, well, things would have gotten different.

 

^No. You're wrong. She IS a terrible dueler. She got owned. So, you say is "less good" than most others. Then, most wizards are sheep. So if most are sheep, and she is worse than most, she must fucking suck.

6 kid against Death Eaters. Hermione gets hit the worst. She doesn't even take out any. Harry, Neville, Luna, (we don't know about Ron or Ginny) at least get one. She doesn't get any, and is almost killed by a silent spell.

Bottom line arkeus: She couldn't duel her way out of a paper bag.