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WIP Harry Potter and the World Beneath by Tellemicus Sundance - T

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Averis, Jan 21, 2010.

  1. Averis

    Averis Don of Delivery ~ Prestige ~

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    Title: Harry Potter and the World Beneath
    Author: Tellemicus Sundance
    Genre: Adventure/Supernatural
    Category: Alternative Universe
    Pairing: Harry/Fleur
    Chapters: 15
    Words: 80,308
    Updated: October 24, 2012
    Published: November 22, 2009
    Status: Work in Progress

    Summary: Running away from the Dursleys at a young age was perhaps the biggest mistake and the greatest feat of his life. Now, he's trapped alone in the wilderness of a world long forgotten by the passage of time. And this is the story of his return.

    Link

    This is one of the most original and entertaining fics I've come across in quite a while. It has been posted in Almost Recommended, but not in For Review. Basically, Harry decides to run away from home at the age of six, robbing the Dursleys before leaving, and through a series of coincidences he finds Platform 9 3/4. Saying anything more gives a lot away, but trust me when I say that the story begins to open up after Harry leaves King's Cross. It's not without its cliches, and of course, it takes some suspension of belief to get over Harry travelling so far from Surrey at the age of six, but reading this story is definitely worth it.

    Right now, I'd give it a 4/5 with potential to get better. The last chapter kind of gets the ball rolling as far as Fleur's role in the story goes. Check it out, guys; I promise there are more than a few things that you will never have seen in Harry Potter Fanfiction.


    Checked by Minion, January 15, 2013
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 15, 2013
  2. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    Well, I did like one of his Naruto fics. The sequel sucked though.

    I liked it. Though the author is kinda stupid, playing retarded, "GUESS WHAT CREATURE THIS IS!?" games and trivia shit like that. The name was a dead giveaway, and the guy thought he was being subtle. -_-

    4/5

    It's not quite perfect because of previously mentioned idiocy and general errors and whatnot; but it's interesting and well written, nevertheless.
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2010
  3. azrael

    azrael Professor

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    It's certainly interesting, I'll give it that. But something about his writing style grated a bit, and some things made no sense or weren't properly explained yet. I'd say it gets 3/5 right now, though I think it's too soon to really judge.
     
  4. Darje

    Darje Groundskeeper

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    Nice! Only a handful of spelling errors I could notice, but this story is rawking.

    You were right, it is full of things I've never seen in HP ff.
     
  5. Anya

    Anya Harley Quinn DLP Supporter

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    Harry Potter befriends a dinosaur...? Lawl.
     
  6. Ceebee

    Ceebee High Inquisitor

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    This sorta reminds of a H/Fleur plot bunny I had with Tarzan parallels. Only it was Harry living in a Demiguise colony. (Demiguises are gorillas that can turn themselves invisible, and their hair is used to make invisibility cloaks.) Getting back to this story, its a pretty weird one, featuring Harry and his
    Dinosaur siblings. Which oddly made me think of The Land Before Time series of children's movies, I think one of the characters in those movies is even has the same name as Harry's 'sister'.
    That aside, I think its a little too early to give anything than preliminary ratings for this one. The story has only just got past the setup and timeskip phase.

    Tentative 3/5 for being on the original side of things, but I wouldn't give it any more than that, the story just hasn't shown itself yet.
     
  7. psihary

    psihary Groundskeeper

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    It did hold my attention throughout all the 5 chapters. And, as long as the story remains as interesting, I'm willing to turn a blind eye on some of the most obvious mistakes and potholes.

    It's a 4/5 from me, and I'm really looking forward for more of this.
     
  8. Azrael's Little Helper

    Azrael's Little Helper High Inquisitor

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    Read this a couple of days ago and lol'ed hard. The sheer incredulity of a Dinotopia crossover blew my mind. The mechanics of the translation between worlds needs some clarification, besides, if the Independents had dinosaurs, why can't wizards? So far the story is interesting enough to keep reading but if the pacifist philosophy and turn-the-other-cheek tendencies of the Dinotopians bleed into this fic I shall be very disappointed, if indeed this is a Dinotopia xover as the title suggests.

    So...where are my sabretooth tigers and pteradactyls?
     
  9. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    Wasn't this the one where Harry grows up with some animals? Yeah, not my cup of tea. I like Harry smart and educated, which is about as far opposed to being brought up by some animals in the wilderness as it can get. When it first came out, I read all that was there (first three chapters) and feel no urge to continue. When Harry runs away from the Dursleys, I expect him to end up in the magical world, not in a setting that is even further removed from everything interesting.

    2/5 for what I read. And no, I can't stand Tarzan either.
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2010
  10. Andro

    Andro Master of Death DLP Supporter

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    The writing was too flat and nothing with a flavor of exceptional originality happened to sustain my interest. In fact, the opposite seemed to be the case, with the canon departure being impelled by the abusive Dursleys. That's not going to work.

    A very suspect 3/5. I suspect it'd be lower the further I read.
     
  11. Hashasheen

    Hashasheen Half-Blood Prince

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    It's .... meh. Nothing to hold my attention.
     
  12. Averis

    Averis Don of Delivery ~ Prestige ~

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    Dude. What can be more interesting then Harry Potter raised by Dinosaurs? You guys are seriously missing the awesome.
     
  13. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    That's going in my sig. Dude.
     
  14. MattSilver

    MattSilver The Traveller

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    I don't quite have the hard-on for dinosaurs Averis seems to be sporting, and I think that combined with the fact it's only been five chapters, makes it an odd choice to be posted here, as of now. For one thing, it's only 30000 words out of a possibly much-longer fic. There's a promise of Harry/Fleur, but again, it's way too fucking early to tell jack or for me to really review...

    But what I've seen so far, it's average. It reads all well and good, with no glaring errors, but just average. No rating, but who knows? Maybe the story will turn out better somewhere down the line, and I'll come back to this thread and give it a rating, recycling bin or not.
     
  15. Orm Embar

    Orm Embar Auror

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    Unique, but it's not exactly easy to fit those two worlds together; it's currently hovering at around 3/5.
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2010
  16. Averis

    Averis Don of Delivery ~ Prestige ~

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    Boing, bitches. Gib me all of that Allosaurus ass..

    ><
     
  17. Stenstyren

    Stenstyren Professor

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    Meh, I commented on this in the almost recommended thread where I think it belongs for now.

    The author focuses on describing the wrong things and I think some of the things she writes is supposed to make me laugh. Not really sure though.

    Anyway, it has the potential to become something good, but it's WAY to early to tell. Wait until Harry get's into the wizarding world at least since that is where the story will really begin.

    Also, dinosaurs are not THAT cool, they can't carry a fic by simply existing.
     
  18. Blaise

    Blaise Golden Patronus

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    Say that to my pet raptor and not online and see what happens.

    On topic: not half bad. I'm sticking with it now just to see how the author facilitates communication between a feral boy who probably hasn't spoken English in a while, with the rest of the wizarding world. OP was right though: I definitely didn't see this coming.

    3/5
     
  19. Dungbomb

    Dungbomb First Year

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  20. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    Dungbomb: If you read the A/N at the beginning of the story you would have seen that kb0 allowed him to take the beginning from his story. He's also his beta reader, I think.
     
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