I agree about the whole Harry/Ginny relationship. Don't get me wrong though, I thought this was a very well written alternate dimension fic, I'm just not crazy over who Harry chose. If it was just one person he got together with, I wish it would have been Yuna. Other than that though, I really enjoyed reading this fic.

 

Again, for those who haven't heard yet, I am not longer wwritning in 3rd person or with a god-like tone.

Huzzahs

Anyway, while Harry/Ginny makes sense canon wis, it's horribly cliche. Most of them are too sappy anyway.

Yeah, harem would be nice, but faling that, maybe just two or three? I saw a ic once where wizarding law allows the heir of a family one wife for every 2 or 3 million galleons, or something like. Once you got over saod amount, then you could have another wife.

That might be difficult to work in with the current plot though. And what about his mother? What would she do if he was a player. Poor Harry.

 

He should take Blaise and Padma, forget the rest.

 

He should stop being a pussy and bitching about how he misses ginslut and how neville is going to get her.... Shut the hell up and go with the hot japeneese veela

 

i can't agree more. HArry must be with Yuna!!! or anyone else but just not ginny, hermione

 

I kindda liked the story. It was a good read when I wanted a feel good fic. Then again there are parts that send me cringe with sugar shock from the fluff.

The only real complaint I have is Harry's "I must try harder to get Ginny" attitude. I'm getting tired of fics where he goes back in time to obsess about her.

Other than those two points its an OK story.

Btw:

The only way it would make sense in canon is a love potion!!

 

H/Luna that would be an interesting fic

 

Well, Harry and Ginny got together in HBP. Actually, I find myself struggling to enjoy cannon now. Book 6 was dissappointing. The only thing in there worth while was thhe horcrux issue.

 

Am I the only one here who absolutely hated the Horcrux thing? It made HBP even worse...

On another note; it has been a while since this has last updated, hasn't it? Or did I miss one?

 

No Exiled your not alone...We've already talked about the horcrux thingy...I think...yep I'm pretty sure we did...we compared it to pokemon...gotta get'em all

 

all of this crap is lies! All Harry has to do is the poke of doom and Voldie will fall over dead and forever vanquished!

 

though i cant stand H/G fluff but this is at least somewhat tolerable. the H/G shit doesnt play that big of a role in the overall story though i have a bit of H/G in the begining of my story though she will betray him and die a rather horrific death lol. ( my story isnt posted as of yet. i am trying to get around to it but typing it all out from paper gets rather boring). the plot is alot better then alot of other time travel fics but still ti has H/G witch annoys me but i do like the H/Yuna scenes.

 

I ussually just skip all the Ginwhore part and just read about Yuna.This Author is a Gin uke: fan,I don't know why but he is.

 

His Second Shadow Mage Fic And Its Better Than The Other One.

 

If anybody's interested a new author has started to re-write this fic with plans of having an ending and a few changes. http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3485944/1/Harry_Potter_and_the_New_Lives

Also SilverAegis gave him permission.

It's up to five chapters and about 60k, most of which was written by the original author save for a few changes. One change here is that it will not be Harry/Ginny, another is that he is making polls for the pairings.

Another change is that the Japanese Veela Yuna is now Jasmine. The biggest, and quite possibly potentially coolest change, is that the regular, eleven year old Harry who was replaced by the ShadowMage!Harry was sent to the replacement Harry's world.

But the worst change is that Harry is not a part of ANY House at all- he is an "apprentice" for every subject. The Gary Sue is strong in this story.

Now onto my review-

This rewrite, like the old one, is pretty mediocre. I admit it, it's not that good- writing style is mediocre, story is very predictable, and character interaction is still cringeworthy. The Lily infatuation is even more evident, but the fluff has decreased.

To be honest, I don't know why I even like this story- it's so mindboggling at times, but I enjoy it. It's a feel good story, I guess, a poorly done one, but it can be enjoying.

2.5/5

 

It's a guilty pleasure.

Like those Desperate Housewives episodes. You know they are crap, but just one more...

And of course, Lily is this fics Eva Longoria.

 

This truly is a guilty pleasure. You know you are reading the same cliché crap, but you like reading it. Though, Harry working out like a pro at age 11 is really, really, shit. Oh, and super chef is also annoying.

 

Tried, but I couldn't get through it. Couldn't stand Harry's family unit. All that "big brother" talk got annoying really fast.

 

Hmm . . .

Where to start witht his train wreck?

1) The grammar and diction are deplorably below amaturish. Subject-Verb agreement, as well as the concept of tense/aspect/mood seem to be foreign concepts to the author.

2) The writing style is stilted and there are pages and pages of pointless prattle that do nothing for the story but take up space.

3) Harry was fucking Fleur, Cho, and who else, with absolutely no real good reason for them to be having sex, other than to show how much of lady's man Harry is.

4) Heir of Griffindor! Also: Cho is Heir of Ravenclaw.

5) Shadowra Flara! Sorry, but the linguistics minor in me demands the authors do a Google search for "English Latin Dictionary" for one of the hundreds availble. I forgive bad Latin grammar as I know Latin not myself, and even Rowling chooses strange Latin grammatical formations for her spells, from what I've read, but a nanometere-thin veneer disguise on English words is annoying as hell.

6) Sakura, Yuna, and the rest. Even Cho Chang is British in every single way save for name. The Half-Veela Japanese-American just annoyed me.

7) I couldn't tell if I was reading a Ranma 1/2 fanfic where Ranma was named Harry and went to Hogwarts, of if I was reading an actual Harry Potter fanfic. Apparently Genma, Soun, and Nodoka all changed their names to Sirius Black, James Potter, and Lily Evens, then moved to Japan. Good God that was annoying.

8) No one actually questions Harry one iota about how he aquired all these skills. Sure, they do ask him, but drop it after some bullshit excuse. Surely these parents have sufficient observation skills to notice whether their son was practicing cooking or not. If my son had THAT great of a personality change and skill-upgrade over the span of an afternoon, I would be calling an exorcist and a team of psychiatrists, not worry about whether he still wanted to prank someone!

9) Hermione's demon-head attack (a la Soun Tendou), and Lily using a mallet on her husband (a la Akane Tendou).

This story is made of lose and fail, and I'm sorry that I wasted a morning and my lunch period reading to chapter eight.

1/5

 

Updated, minor Tonks and Girl!Blaise action.

I found some parts funny, but your mileage may vary.