Word,
You've gotten hammered pretty good in here. Some of that you have to expect at DLP, but some of it was unjustified. I didn't find your rejoinders all that arrogant or pretentious. On the contrary, you admit your story's not great and seem eager to improve it. That's commendable in my book.

On the story itself, I have to say it's better than I would have guessed. If you read me a synopsis of it first, I probably would have never picked it up. Not too big on Fem!Harry to begin with. But, having read it, I find it surprisingly entertaining. For all the limitations of the journal format, I have to give you props for your ingenious use of them in this fic. Especially when Inky is introduced, you managed to find a somewhat all-seeing, third party narrator. Inky itself is a pretty innovative touch. I could have done without the vinegar douche and acidic vaginal secretions though. Can't see Hermione, or anyone else, being irresistably drawn toward lesbianism by the delightful scents and flavours you've conjured up there. Still, I think it's an overall decent fic.

 

People sure have been harsh! I actually really like this story, and I've been following it for quite some time

I think that the journal format works well, as Holly is meant to be writing to Harry. However, if you go back and edit it, you should definitely intersperse it with regular narrative, especially now that your skills as a writer have improved.
I must say that a lot of the criticism might have been revoked if they had just read a bit farther.
I thought that this was a very realistic view of the wizarding world, from the memory charms to the fact that your characters date more than one person throughout their schooling. It is a pet peeve of mine when authors write stories with Harry's ONE TRUE LOVE...its just unrealistic.
In any case, I rate this a 3.5/5. Give it a chance!

 

No, reading farther doesn't change the criticism. It's not even very realistic - and by that I mean more than just the situations. Adding one element of realism doesn't count for much without anything else to back it up. The specifics have been explained many times over, but it's just not very engaging.

 

I've been avoiding this thread because I was pretty sure everyone else would have covered the many problems in this story, but I was bored so I was reading this thread and saw this:

*A Mysterious and Roguishly Handsome Challenger Appears*
Hi, I'm Oneiros.

 

True, some parts aren't realistic (for me, the birth of newt, and Holly's crazy sex tongue). However, there are quite a few ingenious ideas introduced in this fic. That is not to say that it shouldn't be edited and revamped head-to-toe. I just think that the basic premise of Spiral Path is interesting enough that I look forward to each new installment.