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If I Gave You A...

Discussion in 'Flash and Spam Games' started by Xiph0, Jan 4, 2009.

0/5, 0 votes
Page 5 of 5
  1. meatzman2

    meatzman2 Backtraced

    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2008
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    526
    Location:
    Melbourne, Australia
    Feb 24, 2009 #81
    The summary destruction of the Village People's attempts at a comeback tour.

    If I gave you a shot of vodka, a vacuum cleaner and the July edition of Playboy from 1976...
     
  2. Juggler

    Juggler Death Eater DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2008
    Messages:
    993
    Location:
    Nova Scotia, Canada
    Feb 24, 2009 #82
    I'd give the vacuum to a woman, get drunk and fap.

    If I gave you a turban, a plane ticket to America and a squirt gun...
     
  3. Wildfeather

    Wildfeather The Nidokaiser ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
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    Male
    Location:
    Florida
    High Score:
    2,011
    Feb 25, 2009 #83
    I'd never make it on the plane.

    If I gave you a notebook, a pencil, three rubber bands, a cell phone, and an empty gum wrapper...
     
  4. Inquisition

    Inquisition Canadian Ambassador to Japan DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    990
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    Camelot
    Feb 28, 2009 #84
    My name would MacGyver.

    If I gave you a porno mag and a week's supply of condoms...
     
  5. Solomon

    Solomon Heir

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2007
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Minnesota
    Mar 2, 2009 #85
    I'd stash the condoms and fap away.

    If I gave you a flashlight, a box of tissues and a trash bag filled with empty cans of soda...
     
  6. Khazad-Dumb

    Khazad-Dumb Loves the Gay Porn DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Clutch City, USA
    Mar 3, 2009 #86
    I'd beat the fuck out of you for giving me useless shit. If I airdropped you in Washington DC along with a gun with a single bullet...
     
  7. Oz

    Oz For Zombie. Moderator DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Female
    Location:
    Baile Átha Cliath
    Mar 3, 2009 #87
    I'd find you and shoot you.

    If I gave you a CD player, a box of matches and left you on a desert island...
     
  8. Sorrows

    Sorrows Queen of the Flamingos Moderator

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2008
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    Female
    Location:
    Edinburgh
    Mar 4, 2009 #88
    I'd burn your CD player and sunbathe.

    If I gave you a trained monkey butler and a big of grenades...
     
  9. A.K.$J6-J5

    A.K.$J6-J5 Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2014
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    277
    Location:
    London
    Sep 14, 2014 #89
    Remake king Kong with american airport sequrity
    If I gave you OZ address, a stun gun, a bottle of lube and a horse...
     
    Aerylife
  10. Oz

    Oz For Zombie. Moderator DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Female
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    Baile Átha Cliath
    Sep 14, 2014 #90
    I'd show that horse a good time.

    If I gave you a Friends DVD box-set, a shoe-horn and a jumbo-sized tube of toothpaste...
     
  11. Zeelthor

    Zeelthor Scissor Me Timbers

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2008
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    3,521
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    Sep 14, 2014 #91
    I'd show you how to get that Friends box-set past customs.

    If I gave you a cactus, a picture of Meatloaf and the holy hand grenade of Antioch
     
  12. oakes

    oakes Unspeakable DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
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    730
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    Turkey
    Sep 14, 2014 #92
    I'd make you sit on that grenade, fap to the picture and lick the cactus.

    If I gave you a glass of martini and an unexplainable rash?
     
  13. Aekiel

    Aekiel Angle of Mispeling ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Location:
    One of the Shires
    High Score:
    9,373
    Sep 14, 2014 #93
    I'd phone the police.

    If I gave you a head of lettuce, some marmalade and former President George W. Bush?
     
  14. A.K.$J6-J5

    A.K.$J6-J5 Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2014
    Messages:
    277
    Location:
    London
    Sep 14, 2014 #94
    Throw the lettuce at your head then using the marmalade as lubricant take turns raping with bush
    If I gave you pics of naked Jennifer Lawrence,Taures Facebook password and a spoon...
     
  15. TheWiseTomato

    TheWiseTomato Prestigious Tomato ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2009
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    1,084
    Location:
    Australia.
    High Score:
    3694
    Sep 18, 2014 #95
    I'd ask you why you felt the need to use 'raping' and 'Bush' in the same sentence. Then I'd challenge you to a duel with the spoon.
    If I gave you a guide on how to steal and pilot a space shuttle?
     
  16. ScottPress

    ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2013
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    120
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The Holy Moose Empire
    High Score:
    6900
    Sep 18, 2014 #96
    I'd use the shuttle to woo hot nerdy females.

    If I gave you Zeus' thunderbolt and a hydrogen-powered moose...
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2014
  17. Riley

    Riley Alchemist DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2007
    Messages:
    2,345
    Location:
    On The Eastern Seaboard, USA
    Sep 18, 2014 #97
    I'd become Captain Canada and save the world on my Flying Moose of Death.

    If I gave you a bottle of sup[er glue, a fire ant colony and a Life size carboard cut out of Bill Murray.....
     
  18. Zeelthor

    Zeelthor Scissor Me Timbers

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2008
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    3,521
    Gender:
    Male
    Oct 1, 2014 #98
    I'd superglue your ass to the ground near the fire ant colony, give you a laptop, put the poster of Bill Murray in the background as inspiration and not let you go until you finished that fic we discussed once. ;)

    If I gave you an Ikea catalogue, a chain saw and a toupe...
     
  19. oakes

    oakes Unspeakable DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
    Messages:
    730
    Location:
    Turkey
    Oct 1, 2014 #99
    I'd put the toupe on Ikea catalog's top then start working as a travelling ventriloquist, after spending years and years as a performer, I'd finally notice that it's only a catalog and I'd become enraged and murder everyone with the chain saw.

    If I gave you 3 elephants, one bullwhip and a strip club...
     
  20. Legacy

    Legacy Death Eater DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2010
    Messages:
    967
    Oct 1, 2014 #100
    I'd use the whip to motivate my lazy slacker elephants into top racing shape to perform in my elephant powered mobile strip club. Of course the elephants would perform for the boys in the club as well, no reason to discriminate.

    If I gave you a robot belly dancer, a well done 10oz steak, a rolls royce and zombie John Pinette....
     
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