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Oneshot Illusions by S. Thanatos - K - Oneshot

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Hadoren, Apr 14, 2007.

  1. Hadoren

    Hadoren High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Messages:
    500
    Title: Illusions
    Author: S. Thanatos
    Rating: K
    Genre: Angst
    DLP Category: General
    Pairing: HP/NT (somewhat)
    Status: Complete
    Summary: At night, Harry doesn't have much else to do but think. And grieve.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2312484/1/

    What's the best way for Tonks to comfort Harry after OotP?

    This is the most unique use of Tonk's powers that I've ever seen. The concept is pretty chilling.

    4.5/5 as a one-shot.
     
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2007
  2. raja

    raja Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2006
    Messages:
    115
    Location:
    California, USA
    Pretty good, but even for a one-shot that was kinda short... I like the idea though 4/5 for length and lack of development whatsoever
     
  3. Sandono

    Sandono Squib

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2006
    Messages:
    5
    Location:
    Behind you. With a Knife. Cause I am crazy as All
    Didn't seem to flow. Good concept though, don't like it myself but 4/5 because of the originality.
     
  4. deathinapinkboa

    deathinapinkboa Minister of Magic

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2006
    Messages:
    1,284
    Location:
    Democratic Republic of The Congo
    This is far to short, and it is also rather choppy. It gives not explination as to why any of this is happening (such as the appsense of the rest of the Boys and Dumbledore thinking it a good idea to send "Sirius" to Harry). Frankly, I don't think it was worth my time to read.

    2/5
     
  5. World

    World Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2006
    Messages:
    3,332
    Location:
    Axis of Evil (Original)
    I think it has the highest goodness per word rate I've seen yet.

    4/5
     
  6. Amerision

    Amerision Galactic Sheep Emperor DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2006
    Messages:
    2,541
    Location:
    The Gardens in the Desert Sand
    Lacks flow and length. Word choice could have been better as well.

    3/5

    Like the idea though.
     
  7. Runeknight

    Runeknight Second Year

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2006
    Messages:
    50
    Location:
    Auckland, New Zealand
    Very nice. The idea is good, it's written well and I liked it. Only flaw was it's length.

    I think this would be a great idea for starting a HP/NT story. If she had become Sirius because she herself had wanted to help him get over Sirius's death, this could be the beginning of their relationship.

    4.5/5
     
  8. darklordmike

    darklordmike Headmaster

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2009
    Messages:
    1,098
    Location:
    USA
    Eh, gotta agree with Amerision on this one. It was a neat idea, but it wasn't executed very well. The backstory is handled poorly, and the passage of time in the fic is awkward. Reads like an interesting rough draft.

    3/5
     
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