Resurrection of story threads, to discuss the story, is perfectly acceptable. Edit: As long as it winds up returning some discussion and it's not just UPDATE!

It's the main forum where folks bump months old stuff that sucks. We try not to murder folks when they're a new member though.

 

Story is back up. http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2787109/1/

 

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Huuu?

New Link Needed?

 

Man i love this story very good uncommon pairing

 

i am just starting it and the onl reason i continue to read despite the onslought(sp?) of cliches is because it has gotten good reviews. i hope you have not led me astray for if you have, and it results inme reading another terrible independent story, then the consequences will be dire. although considering i have been posting for abooooout 12 days now and only second year.. the amount i could do would be seriously limited. NVMD IM A THIRD YEAR. now things are gonna get heavy.

 

It was good....right until he meets Ron and Herman and gets all Best Friends Forever with them.

 

This was an enjoyable story, but the thing that turned me off was where it said, "Harry, although a powerful wizard, was still intimidated by three people, Rowena Ravenclaw, Molly Weasley and Poppy Pomfrey."

This author has good ideas, and a dark and independent Harry is always a plus, but being BFFs with Ron and Hermione and the the quote above killed it for me.

 

I think that was one of my turn off's as well. For such a story where he is nothing but powerful, independent etc. and suddenly he is all submissive to those fucking clowns is a real kick in the teeth. Still it's an all right fic with some well done timetravel and a unique pairing that dispite the submissive bitch he can be, he is still using Black magic and all round kicking ass.

 

Could someone update the first post with this link?


--bornagainpenguin

 

Dude, can please not do that! no necros! I keep thinking there is something new going on.

 

How about you stop posting as well- you only need to post once about it...

 

BAP is the master archiver and there are no necros in the library so STFU.

 

The fear of Molly Weasley and Promfrey competes with fear of the Bat Bogey Hex. People think them charming or cute, but it's just straight-up retarded.

I'll refrain from ranting on the Imperius Potion + Bellatrix, Excrucio Maxima, Voldemort who explodes the moment he hears Riddle, the magic credit card, the physiques of Harry and Salazar, etc. Cliches can be attested to age, but I don't think the story ever belonged in the Library.

There isn't any color or excitement. The characters, Salazar especially, are bland. Merely having him sit there primly with a sly smile isn't going to win over any readers. The writing is nothing special, but the problem is exacerbated by the fact that everything that highlighted the fic - is told in a recounting manner. Take chapter three for enough examples to support a thesis, which is just bullshit.

It begins with:

... That was it.

This should have been great, had we actually read this. The storytelling is so utterly detached from the events and happenings I can scarcely believe it. What drew me to the story, Harry's time in the past, is glossed over like you wouldn't believe.

The pairings are twisted. The Harry/Rowena couldn't convince a man of the difference between black and white and was fleeting, over in the span of a single chapter. It might as well not have happened. By the time Rowena and Harry met again, the reunion killed the Harry/Bellatrix.

Granted, it was foreshadowed quite blatantly, which makes it all the more hilarious since the effort the author invested in the Harry/Bellatrix was infinite times what was invested in the Harry/Rowena.

And there is the fact that zero times infinity is still zero.

The author actually started writing the story once Harry returned to his native time, which is far, far too late. It is a pity, since the duels actually carried some excitement.

A massive disappointment, there were some select moments when I didn't feel contempt for the authors avoidance of exercising creativity, but they were few and far between. 2/5.

 

Sounds fucking horrible.