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Oneshot Just Friends by Marks - NC17

Discussion in 'Restricted Section' started by Alraune, Aug 22, 2010.

  1. Korisovra

    Korisovra Headmaster

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    Holy shit, Amerison...Are those Sting lyrics in your sig?
     
  2. Oz

    Oz UNQUESTIONABLY THE MOST HETERO MAN IN THE WORLD Moderator DLP Supporter

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    Yes they are. And yes to this fic.

    4/5
     
  3. Amerision

    Amerision Galactic Sheep Emperor DLP Supporter

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    Are you implying Desert Rose is a bad song?
     
  4. Stalin's Pipe Organs

    Stalin's Pipe Organs Auror

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    Nothing stood out in this fic. It wasn't bad but neither was it good. Same with Luna's characterization which I didn't find very endearing.

    3/5
     
  5. kalespr

    kalespr Fourth Year

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    It is definitely nice to see a mostly in-character Harry and Luna moment, and better yet, an unabashedly odd Luna. However, as a few others have stated, this short didn't particularly strike me as anything special, beyond the rarity of anything-approaching-IC Luna/Harry fic.

    With just that said, I would probably give the story a 4/5 (rounding up from 3.5). However, with the occasional awkwardness in some of the characterization/interaction and a certain emotional-flatness I felt in/from the narrative, I feel rounding down to a 3/5 is a more honest rating, regardless of my adoration of Luna as a character.

    For a LL/HP ship fan? It is certainly recommended, but on general merits alone? I'd give it a lukewarm "decent".

    In short, what he said:

     
  6. Korisovra

    Korisovra Headmaster

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    If it were a bad song I wouldn't have remembered those lyrics even though it's been years since I heard it lol

    *off to download some Sting*
     
  7. Innomine

    Innomine Unspeakable Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Expected smut, got smut. Not to bad though. Learning more to 4/5, than 3/5. Nice, simple, short and sweet..
     
  8. Anarchy

    Anarchy Fourth Champion DLP Supporter

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    3/5, Luna did not seem well written or in character to me. I liked the other HP/LL smut fic that passed through here recently more.
     
  9. Taure

    Taure Magical Core Enthusiast Prestige DLP Supporter

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    I love how everyone seems to have different conceptions of Luna's character, and this leads to different perspectives on how this fic succeeds or fails.

    My own view on Luna is that she is essentially a normal teenage girl. She has normal material wants, needs, actions, etc. She's not some complete lunatic, nor is she a seer. She goes to classes, she does her homework, she worries about friends and boys. She just happens to be a bit wacky, possibly because of her painful past. But I think most fanfics massively overstate her weirdness. She's still human. She's still a teenage girl.

    I loved the way this fic portrayed the balance between her wackiness and normalcy. It got it spot-on, for me.
     
  10. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    I'm not willing to rule out her having the potential of being able to have visions, or be more aware of mystical things, but I don't believe she is hereditarily some kind of lunatic. Certainly she can't predict the future like a prophet. She could be sensitive to the future though, maybe a special intuition of some kind.

    People do go over the top with Luna. I think the most plausible explanation is that she doesn't feel accepted by those around her, and so imagines a world more fitting to her; immersing herself to escape reality.

    The story was okay, and Luna seemed to be written in such a manner that it didn't offend one's own understanding of her, but it didn't explore her. The smut was mediocre, but only because it was not very adventurous and felt a little too methodical and linear.

    There should have been more dialogue as the set up, the story is entirely too short to be graded on anything but the smut, really. It's okay, a short read at any rate, so I guess it doesn't matter.

    I might be a little biased. Luna is my favorite character, and there seems to be so little on her to read...

    3.5/5, rounded to 4
     
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2010
  11. Stalin's Pipe Organs

    Stalin's Pipe Organs Auror

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    I don't like her written like this. In my opinion the best Luna is a Loony!Luna. The way she is written in Conlaodh's Song was very good. Although yeah I agree, none of that Luna being a seer shit.
     
  12. imanut

    imanut First Year

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    I'll give it a 3/5. I think it did Luna's characterization very well, but other than that, it didn't bring anything really new or interesting to the table. Which combined with the fact that its only a one-shot, prevents me from giving it a higher score.
     
  13. Lamora

    Lamora Definitely Not Batman

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    Excellently realistic, much more so than most of the shit that passes as lemons. I want to hear about two people having sex, not the movement script of a cheap porno. 5/5.
     
  14. h2o

    h2o Professor

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    I think Taure pretty much got my view on Luna spot-on. She's just a bit odd. Not a lunatic.. just Luna :)

    As for this fic, I think its really good but has a few problems here and there. I find it caught between a smutfic and something more. As people have stated before, Luna using the word "fuck" seems too ooc. And her being experienced... just doesn't seem to be fitting either.

    She's what, 15 in HBP and a bit of an outcast? I find it quite possible that she hadn't even been kissed by the time Slughorn's party arrives in the series. Her guiding Harry in his first experiance even if it was the first time for her still seems right tho. I'd like to see this story re-written and expanded. And a more... shocked reaction from Ginny would be awesome :awesome

    Edited to add: Forgot to add a rating. 4/5 from me.
     
    Last edited: Sep 3, 2010
  15. Fellator

    Fellator Squib

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    Link is down and a simple google search turned up with nothing. Anywhere else I can find this?
     
  16. wordhammer

    wordhammer Supreme Mugwump DLP Supporter

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    Found it on the Quidditch Pitch!
     
  17. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Epic! I sure lol'd. Excessively.
     
  18. CaptainFlowers

    CaptainFlowers Fourth Year DLP Supporter

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    Just read it and absolutely enjoyed it. Shame there isn't a bit more to read.

    5/5
     
  19. Dystopian Destiny

    Dystopian Destiny Third Year

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    Links for Aparecium and quidditch pitch seem to have gone bad.

    EDIT: A PWP? Story delivers exactly what it says in the summary. One of the better fics of its genre, with non-Seer!non-AI level!Luna. Got some corny dialogues though.

    Rating - 3/5
     
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2018
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