Has anyone every seen a harry/Lavender fic....i never seen one so i was wondering...

 

There have been some H/Lav scenes, i.e. Shadow Play, but no strictly H/L stories. But after her performance in book 6, I doubt you ever will...

 

HBP reminded me too much like fanfiction I had read in my innocent fledgling years, and it was bad then as it is in official vesion. We should write a letter to JKR asking her to re-write it. Also, Lav sucks a lot of dick, she seems to be the slutiest and ditziest girl in Hogwarts. She diserves to get train pulled on her by atleast 20 Death Eaters and maybe through in a few Minators and other animals. As she should to Ferinze, she is down with beastiality, sick fuck. I honestly don't like a character that thinks "once you go horse, you'll always stay on course, because they're the best ofcourse".


Shoot me now, I've gone insane

 

damn...this is depressing...When the hell did she become a slut???I hate HBP i will never look at it as a book.Maybe a bad fanfic but never a book.

 

Lavendar became a slut the day she was born because the Healer fingered her. He knew she was destened by the Porno Prophecy to be the Girl-Who-Fucked. Seriously, when most kids got regular toy broomstick for they're 5th birthday, Mr. and Mrs. Brown got Lavendar a model that vibrated on three settings: Porno, Holy Shit! and Horse. Guess which setting she liked. She lost her virginity at age 12 to Lucius, that sick fuck, and she lost her animal virginity in 5th year. She lost it on a dare by the Patil twins to walk backwards through the Forbidden Forest with no bottoms on, not even a skirt. She came upon a clan of 47 Centaurs who repeated pulled train on her continously for a whole week. Lavendar Brown later commented that, "it was the best week of my entire life, I got to experince some deep dicking. The best part was the four way, I was soo filled, I couldn't move." Because of her exploits with the Centaurs, Lavendar can not bear children. But thats alright to her, "cause every time I have sex, I worried about catching STIs like Herpes, AIDs or children. Now I get one taken off my list." Her slutiness was sealed when she dissided to 'date' Ron Weasley for the majority of their 6th year. "He was okay," she later commentated, "at least he knew how to use an engorgement charm well...enough."

Okay, I need to stop. Seriously.

 

Okay, I think I must be confusing fanon and canon too much.

But I always remembered Lavender as being ditzy, annoying, completely gossipy and her and Parvati spouting off their love off Divination and Trelawney. And I thought that was the extent of her character through OotP? Was there ever anything worthwhile other than a pair of legs in Gryffindor tower to spread?

HBP did turn her into the temporary trailer trash for Ron to grow up and become a big boy around, but I've never once considered her a remotely interesting or worthwhile character. Token gossip and in-house aggravation for the anti-divination feelings. Period.

What'd I miss?

 

I've seen every female character wit harry but lavender...i was just wondering why i never saw her with harry

 

Because Harry would know better then to fuck that whore...

That's my point, and I'm sticking to it.

 

LMAO!!!! *Dies*

 

She might have been a workable character before HBP, but now it would take a crap load of OCness and development to get past her "won-won" thing with Ron.

Though I'm not impressed with the explosion of "slut" Lavender. Personally I prefer more interesting "sluts" in fiction, i.e. Mitsuko Soma from BR.

 

I was really just joking around, trying to get a laugh, and seeing how far I could take it.