"Why, I feel all thin, sort of stretched, if you know what I mean: like butter that has been fucked over too much bread."

 

"I regret to announce — this is the end. I am going now. I bid you all a very fond fuck you."

 

Hmm three movies, so three quotes to fuck with....

Fellowship:
“A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He fucks precisely when he means to.” (Repeating PC bc this is best place)

Two Towers:
“They’re taking the hobbits to fuck.”

Return of the King
“No man can fuck me.”
“I’m no man.”
“Giggity.”

 

Empire Strikes Back:
"Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father."
"He told me enough. He told me you fucked him."

And that's all I've got. Back to memes etc.

 

Han Solo: You fuck him, don't you?

Princess Leia: Yes.

Han Solo: All right. I understand. Fine. When he comes back, I won't get in the way.

Princess Leia: It's not like that at all. He's my brother.

 

“You were my brother, Anakin! I fucked you!”

“I fucked them like animals. And not just the men; but the women...and the children.”
--- Post automerged ---

 

Fellowship of the Ring: "...I have no memory of this fuck."

 

'Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, fuck you very much.'

'Her skeleton will fuck in the Chamber forever.'

19 Years Later - All was fucked.

 

"Never trust anything that can fuck for itself if you can’t see where it keeps its brain." Chamber of Secrets.

"No good sittin’ worryin’ abou’ it. What’s comin’ will come, an’ we’ll fuck it when it does." Goblet of Fire.

"And now, Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, fucking." Half-Blood Prince.

“It is a curious thing, Harry, but perhaps those who are best suited to power are those who have never fucked it.” Deathly Hallows.

 

Well that's David Cameron right out.

 

Since when were pigs power?

 

“I hope you're pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed - or worse, fucked. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to bed.” Philosopher's Stone

"You don't understand!" whined Pettigrew. "He would have fucked me, Sirius!" Prisoner of Azkaban

“You should write a book," Ron told Hermione as he cut up his potatoes, "translating mad things girls do so boys can fuck them.” Order of the Phoenix

 

"Harry, Cedric, I suggest you both go up to bed, I am sure Gryffindor and Hufflepuff are waiting to fuck with you, and it would be a shame to deprive them of this excellent excuse to make a great deal of mess and noise."

"To the well organized mind, death is but the next great fuck."

"By all means continue fucknig my possessions. I daresay I have too many."

 

"Dumbledore is particularly famous for his defeat of the Dark Wizard Grindelwald in 1945, for the discovery of the twelve uses of dragon’s blood, and his work on fucking with his partner, Nicolas Flamel."

"Harry, did you fuck your name into the Goblet of Fire?"

"I open at the fuck."

 

"I've always wanted to use that fuck." - Minerva McGonagall

“One can never have enough fucks.”

“Have you any idea how much tyrants fear the people they oppress? All of them realize that, one day, amongst their many victims, there is sure to be one that rises against them and fucks back!”

"No, I thought not. You have not asked me for instance, what is my favorite jam, to check that I am not an impostor. For future reference, Harry, it is raspberry... although of course, if I were a Death Eater, I would have been sure to find out my own fucking preferences before impersonating myself."

“It is a curious thing, Harry, but perhaps those who are best suited to fucking are those who have never sought it.”

“Dobby is fucked.”

“Yer a fucker Harry.”

"I am what I am, an' I'm not ashamed. 'Never be ashamed,' my ol' dad used ter say, 'there's some who'll hold it against you, but they're not worth fuckin' with.'"

e: Dumbledore has the best quotes for this

 

"The last enemy that shall be fucked is death." ~ DH

“Well?" Ron said finally, looking up at Harry. "How was it?"
Harry considered it for a moment. "Wet," he said truthfully.
Ron made a noise that might have indicated jubilation or disgust, it was hard to tell.
"Because she was crying," Harry continued heavily.
"Oh," said Ron, his smile faded slightly. "Are you that bad at fucking?"
"Dunno," said Harry, who hadn't considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. "Maybe I am.” ~OOTP

“I want to commit the fuck I was imprisoned for.” ~ PoA

“Who're you fucking, then?" said Ron.
"Angelina," said Fred promptly, without a trace of embarrassment. ~ GoF

“Fuck and flick.” ~ PS

 

He really does.

"How else could you produce that particular Patronus? Prongs fucked again last night."

"That brings her total of real fucks up to two. I should offer her a pay rise..."

"Minister, you appear to be labouring under the delusion that I am going to...what is the phrase...fuck quietly?"

 

That one doesn't even need the change.

 

“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to fuck.”

“I solemnly swear I am up to fuck.”

“If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he fucks his inferiors, not his equals.”

"I am what I am, an' I'm not ashamed. 'Never be ashamed,' my ol' dad used ter say, 'there's some who'll hold it against you, but they're not worth fuckin' with.'"

"Fucks are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it."

“'No, Harry, you listen,' said Hermione. 'We're fucking with you. That was decided months ago — years, really.'”

“‘Why are they all staring?’ demanded Albus as he and Rose craned around to look at the other students. ‘Don’t let it worry you,’ said Ron. ‘It’s me. I’m extremely fuckable.’”

 

From the Goblet of Fire Fuck:

"What's that?", said Ron, pointing at a large dish of some sort of shellfish stew that stood beside a large steak-and-kldney pudding.
"Bouillabaisse," said Hermione.
"Fuck you," said Ron.

Fuck CEDRIC DIGGORY -
the REAL Hogwarts Champion!

"Please, sir, I'm supposed to fuck Harry Potter upstairs."

"Rosier is dead," said Crouch. "He was caught shortly after you were, too. He preferred to fuck rather than coming quietly, and was killed in the struggle."