Vigil's awesome. I miss EDI though

 

I don't see what the fuss about EDI is. Really, we have Vigil; and EDI just doesn't compare. Vigil>EDI. No brainer there. (MonkeyEpoxy, this is more about the reviews than just your post).

Loved the last two chapters and am quite happy for the potential Miri/Shep friendship.

Besides, Shep's new batcave gifted to her by TIM is simply amazeballs.

P.S. Welcome to the DLP, LogicalPremise.

 

Updated with a Shepard chapter, and I think we got an EDI hint.

Spoiler

I realized that the Normandy never went to Luna in this version to take out the rogue AI there, and... Enhanced Defense Initiative?

I also like the new take on threatening Mechs.

 

Updated. I kinda found myself skimming a lot of the psychobabble analysis, but I'm intrigued by the plan Shepard has formulated. At the very least it should be fun watching her and her armada demolish pirate lords.

Also, rating got up to 4 stars neat.

 

Solid update, not sure if the psychobabble was all that accurate, pretty sure citing Freud is a no no in modern psychology, at least, but yeah, plan seems solid. Liked her video massage, it's something I'd like to see as an an actual fanvideo, actually.

 

I actually found myself liking the initial opening and the following discussion between Chambers and Shepard even if it was mostly Chambers monologuing with Shepard only offering a number of replies or questions.

You are right it is a bit of a 'no, no, no, don't do this'. And it felt a bit jarring when I read that part about Freud. Good old Ziggy just isn't in the vogue anymore. But hell, maybe in a century or two he will back in fashion.

The psycho-babble was a bit spotty and all I got from it was that... Shepard has some major issues that need attention and so far no one did anything to really help her. But Chambers is now at the helm and will do her best to help her work through her issues. All the while drinking her booze and smoking her fags.

I do like how Shep will go about her re-emergence and re-establishing herself as force to be reckoned with while maintaining the masquerade.

I was smiling when Ezno told her that he will follow her lead to a point but that his loyalty is to Cerberus and he will ensure its integrity where the base is concerned.

 

Lol, good point, maybe there will be some discovery in a century or two how he was right all along. Wouldn't be the strangest thing in the Mass Effect universe that LogicalPremise created.

"Yeah, there are aliens, every single person in power is a horrible douche, we are kinda fucked on the whole galactic frontier part, eldtritch robotic abominations are bound to attack and, oh yeah, Freud was actually right about a lot of stuff. Darnedest thing."

Dunno, the ways she said she was going to tackle Shepards countless issues seemed a bit meh. I admit that she has balls, trying to piss off the unstable, transhuman cybertronic, parahuman mass murderer in front of her, who can legally and practically get away with murdering her, but, dunno, there is a line between "appreciates bluntness and no bullshit talk" and "doesn't want to be insulted".

But honestly, that's jsut nitpicking, I like that they acknowledge that her psychological problems need work and that there is no such thing as an instant cure for most of those, just that they need a lot of time, patience and nerve to deal with them one at a time, and that right now, they do not have that.

Ironic, though, since she slammed the Alliance for using her by making her repress her issues with patchwork, and then do her job, whereas her grand plan seems to be to acknowledge she has issues, but since she lacks the time to do anything about them in a profound way, repress them again with patchwork and then do her job.

Edit: awesome this story finally got out of the recycling bin.

 

That Which Cannot Die has been updated twice recently. (LogicalPremise, the author, is going through some legit IRL stuff)

It was some fun stuff. Shepard being a fuckin... . Well. She is destruction, plus the admiralty doing speculations on, 'The Butcher,' and in the most recent chapter... Freedom's Progress. I'm a fan of how he's turned Freedom's Progress into a penal fortress world, it makes the Collector's abductions even that more unbelievable and scary. All in all, this did better at horror than the actual game did... though this was just an intro to ME2. The collectors have a disadvantage, simply being agents of the sky blocking, ultra omnipotent robots. This fic seems like it's going to make the terrifying. Legit monsters that the reaper controlled Protheans should be, after all this time.

Yessssss.

Man, this is a great Illusive Man, and this is still one of my fave ME fics. I'm still waiting for a gloriously written biotic Shepard story where the CMDR laughs at the idea of using conventional weapons while hurling warpfire, but this is as close as I've gotten. It's hard to be picky with cybernetic biotic Jesus fuckin Christ launching 2200 lbs boxes at robots at terminal velocity.

 

Am glad this updated as well. My favourite parts have been the reactions of outsiders, really. The meeting of the Admirals was entertaining and the Spectre Delacour parts were just pure fun. Poor guy, really. He truly has extremely shitty luck. Pretty sure that at one point in time, when Shepard is revealed and reinstated, his command will be snatched back out of his grasp to Shepard. It doesn't help that all of them, unfairly, really, resent him for not being Shepard.

And yet, he is also jerkish enough that one doesn't quite like him enough to be on his side either. Pretty well balanced character in that regard.

I am not sold on the monster parts though, have to say, not a fan of the Reapers being nearly invincible eldtritch monsters. Didn't like it in the game, don't like it here. Don't think it fits with the whole military sci fi theme.

That said, good chapters though, and damn, Tali has become ice cold, being okay with another Quarian being thoroughly interrogated by Cerebous.

You know, one of my favourite parts of the whole fanfic series has been the reaction of the people back in the first story, where there were memes and stuff about Shepard. Like with the "Shepard hits on your girl, YOU apologize". I would love to see something akin to the PHO interlude in Worm fics, where we see the reactions of normal people to Shepards deeds. Rather sad that that was just a one time thing.

 

*dryly* I think I can accommodate that request about the reactions of others in the very next chapter, Reflections. One thing that botherd me IMMENSELY is how in the Nine Burning Hells someone like Shepard could so blithely be accepted back as alive after dying. You have a major movie about you and a memorial flame and are on recruiting posters, but no one recognizes you when you stop around except for a single shopkeeper...

...Goddammit, Bioware.

I've tried to keep Shepard realistic while showing her backsliding in some ways -- she pulls up a drone and uses her biotics as a support in some ways, but at the same time is still too flashy. Some of this is due to what Kelly will talk about with Shepard soon: She has even LESS reason to fear death now than before. Not only has she lost everything she had, but she's already survived it!

Himuradono nearly killed me with a PM about how Ahern would respond to Shepard's actions : "Oh god, and I trained that? Airlock, fastest!"

Mm. Reapers.

I did not care for the Reapers being played up as invincible, eldritch monsters and then being shown up as incompetently coded servants of an incompetently coded AI. But I'm not sure how else to present them besides trying to restore their original Mythos flavor while keeping in mind the key point that they HAVE to have vulnerabilities.

The utilization of Reaper tech (at least in the large scale stuff -- engines, weapons and the like) will be augmented by several other developments. I do NOT want to spoil and even hinting would probably give up the whole game, but I will say that there's a reason the Leviathans were doing weird experiments in deep space and making preparations.

But rest assured there will be the capability for an actual fight by the forces of the galaxy. Not one, ultimately, that they can win with conventional weapons, but one that does require them to hold off the Reapers with nothing more than pure balls and bravery to give the unconventional weapon time to work.

I am interested, though, in how you think the Reapers should be cast. My take on the Collector is more of the horror type, and you've already noticed I like to bleed clashing genres into the pure milscifi base (high heroic fantasy, conspiracy suspense, depressive romance).

How can I make it better?

 

I'm all for Reapers being cast as this unimaginable threat no one can really grasp because of how Other the Reapers actually are. Think Outsiders from Dresden - yeah, they can shrug off pretty much everything you throw at them. Unless you know how to throw shit at them; vide The Merlin and The Gatekeeper, stonewalling an army of Outsiders charging their ranks while Wizards were in full retreat.

Notice that all the way up to Arrival DLC Reapers had that slight Lovecraftina vibe going on for them? The taunting, the foreshadowing. It all slowly built apprehension for when they actually hit the galaxy. Even the mission with the derelict Reaper was kept along the lines of horror and suspense with this oppressive feeling all around you as you fought your way to the Reaper core.

That's how Reapers should be cast. Spooky as all get out.

For that matter when a bunch of kilometer long objects start entering atmosphere the weather patterns around the world should go to shit in a handbasket pronto.

Dear Author,

Write the Reapers as you like. Just make them appropriately monstrous.

--

Good to know.

No, seriously. As I said, there was a major Shepard Moment in this chapter that had all the hallmarks of Sara regressing back to her Eden Prime and Almor(the planet from chapter one or two of the first story). The last thing we needed was Shepard to start an inner-monologue and I'd feel back at home with the first story.

Seriously, I almost had flashbacks while reading this chapter and thought: here we go again.

On the other hand check whom she took down to the surface: Taylor, Lawson are okay. But why the hell drag Sedanya with her? What, did she think Sedanya would set up a triage in the middle of unsecured, possibly booby-trapped field because there was a possibility some quarian had a tummy ache?

Then she grabs Tali, because why the hell not?

See it's like she tries to subconsciously recreate her old squad. She has two biotic 'marines' with her. Shepard even once remarked that Miranda looked a bit like a posh-version of Beatrice Shields.

So she has her two marines. She still isn't feeling at home with her squad. So she drags Tali for old times sake. And then she ask Sedanya to join them because maybe something in that noggin of hers harkens she needs an asari in vicinity in some pale facsimile of Liara.

Am I onto something with this, @LogicalPremise? Or am I just overthinking what I've had read?
--

Well the thing is that Delacor is the 'company man' who had the patently bad taste of setting shop on Shepard's former ship. Of course we are not to like the dude.

--
@LogicalPremise: What happened with Susan D'Alte? When do we get to see her again? Or did you kill her off?

 

And this, right here, is why I like DLP.

No one else caught her trying to subconsciously recreate her squad. Although I am suprised no one figured out that it was hardly by accident.

Remember, I like layers. Layers and payoffs introduced way back when. There is a reason for literally everything happening in this chapter (well, except for the fact I felt Kal'Reegar came off flat, but in my defense I didn't have a lot to work with from canon).

I studied psychology, I know full well that Freud isn't on any sane list of influence that would be used on Shepard -- but when the average layperson thinks of psychology, what name hits them first? Most of that convo was indeed BS...but it was (to Shepard) credible sounding BS that attacked the idea that she could dismiss Kelly ... or that the Alliance had been playing straight with her.

Squad selection is no different. The Illusive Man's choices for who would be with Shepard at the outset of this little adventure were made with the careful planning he's done everything else with. We have stolid big black marine who is also a biotic, channel a bit of both Alenko and Cole. We have the figure of Miranda who is allowed to get a bit too emotionally involved (putting Shepard at ease, the Illusive Man is really good at this) and of course Tali.

The chapters will make a lot more sense in hindsight (much like some of the things that happened in OSABC, like the introduction of Susan on Noveria, made zero sense until waaay later in ATTWN).

But I still have to think carefully as to how not to backslide to the point where it's stupid -- I don't need MonkeyEpoxy beating me up about my word count again.

As for the Reapers...

Ultimately, the sort of vibe you describe will fit them -- somewhat. At the end of this, my challenge is to invoke what no other author has ever attempted to do with Reapers -- make their actions and choices seem reasonable, if unfathomable in some ways. There is more (and worse) out there than Reapers, after all, much like the Mythos.

I am attempting to experiment with something in the next chapter that will once again invoke sort of the same things I had in OSABC with the 'outside view'.

Delacor ... is not and should not be a sympathetic character, but one that I want people to feel a touch bad about hating on. I wanted to explore the Survivor as well as the Hero of Elysium and the Butcher of Torfan in my work, and I've already made Branson out to be a vile, fake ultimate hero. Delacor gets the limelight a bit in TWCD as a distaff to Shepard.

I am writing it my way -- but I've learned a LOT by just reading people's reactions, ideas, and the like. I love incorporating suggestions because it helps me think of things I would have never done otherwise.

I don't know when I'll write some more. I feel like garbage and with my mom's issues often times I'm not at home resting but helping her out. I'll have to see what happens this weekend -- maybe if I could get another awesome quote from MonkeyEpoxy I'd been encouraged to write

As for Susan ... well, you'll see. She's not dead.

 

The combat tactics backslide was great in my opinion but then again my degree is in Psychology.

Regarding near death experiences (or in this case actual death experience):

"One of the reasons life seems so different afterward is because the experiencer now has a basis of comparison unknown before. Familiar codes of conduct can lose relevance or disappear altogether as new interests take priority. Such a shift in reference points can lead to a childlike naivete. With the fading of previous norms and standards, basic caution and discernment can also fade. It is not unusual to hear of near-death experiencers being cheated, lied to, or involved in unpleasant mishaps and accidents. Once they are able to begin integrating what happened to them, discernment usually returns." Source: https://iands.org/aftereffects-of-near-death-states.html

So I really do expect to see Shepard backslide but I think shes just at the edge of just far enough. Once coming off the table she has been busy getting used to her new form and now shes finally ran into some limits. Now is in my opinion the right time for a self evaluation of what exactly it means for her to be alive again and a look at what shes been doing and saying 'What the heck.'

After all she was extremely appreciative of Ahern and his teachings because to her, (in my opinion) they are one of the more meaningful moments in both her career and life. Add to that the fact that it was relatively recent event in her mind and it may be a jarring memory back towards some sort of normal. She does have glimpses of the training shinning through here in the combat. Grenades, creative use of the environment, wearing a helmet. But I have a feeling Ahern would tear apart that battle six ways to Sunday and then beat the mech in a sim with a rock.


But I am loving the new chapters thanks LogicalPremise!

 

I feel like I need to do a re-read... maybe just from Eingana on though, heh.

As far as Reapers go, and forgive me but I don't have a long post in me right now, but I feel like everything Reaper post-Arrival can be ignored forever. They should be eldrich, borderline chthonian, horrors. Himuradomo's likening of them to the Dresdenverse Outsiders is apt. The games got indoctrination somewhat kinda sorta right, but I feel like they didn't go far enough, and I don't think the shields n shit in canon that we saw in Leviathan should be as effective as they were while reaper artifacts were being studied.

When you stare too long into the darkness, it stares back and all that.

 

Great to see you back LogicalPremise, I hope you and your mother feel better soon.

We've seen the Reapers communicate in earlier chapters and I think you captured the "reasonable but unfathomable" feel perfectly. My suggestion would be contrast the apocalyptic conflict that will follow their arrival with glimpses into the Reaper perspective. The citadel species will see their fleets crushed, worlds burn and populations go mad and/or zombified while the Reapers may in turn be terrified the citadel species will force them to break the Severity and attract the attention of greater powers.

 

The confirmation of somebody being alive never felt so ominous.

 

Apparently, I missed that Delacour's code name was The Iron Man, here I thought it was something like cockroach xD

Well, Liara and Tel are certainly in a shitty situation, pretty sure that therapy and medicine can only help so much after a certain point.

Hope we will get some Archangel POV next.

Nice to see that the internet hasn't changed much, in the future. People are still doing vs battles.

So yeah, cool chapter. Spectre team up should be interesting. Looking forward to see who will find out first. Kinda thinking it will be a while, after they have recruited Archangel and the Sisters of Vengeance and have it reveal at the same time, to see it was Shepard's old crew all along.

 

Well I think the asari, especially the Thirty, are about ten seconds from flipping out and thinking they have an ardat-yaksi matriarch on the loose. The finger-pointing who exactly spawned that one's going to be epic. And hilarious.

Just imagine those thirty old bags snarking and pulling all kinds of dirty shit on each other trying to figure out which two of them boinked and hid a kid of theirs. I can see it already:
A accusing B she wasn't seen for some time eight hundred years ago. And stating that she most likely was preggers with the latent ardat.

Only for C to accuse A that she herself spent a lengthy sojourn on some obscure moon, communing i.e. screwing, with some cousin.

And so on and so forth until it looks like a cheerleader get together where they all just laundry their dirt against each other. C'mon, after centuries of coexistence the grudges must be fucking epic.


Tevos' already getting a bit 'shrill'. Probably already thought about that possibility and already despairing the fallout.



After the reveal it's going to be like that: Oh, thank the Goddess! It was only Shepard.

 

This story keeps meeting and exceeding my expectations. Good job Logical Premise.

 

With the next chapter your wish is my command.