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WIP On the Way to Greatness - By Mira Mirth - T

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by ChuckDaTruck, Mar 31, 2009.

  1. Memory King

    Memory King Order Member DLP Supporter

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    You're right that it's never mentioned in PS, but there were some rumours regarding that circulating the school. Harry confermed them during the confrontation with Ernie after the Parseltongue fiasco.

    And we're getting off topic.
     
  2. Aekiel

    Aekiel Angle of Mispeling ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Makes you wonder if being a bit... rough during sex could turn a lass into a pseudo-werewolf :p. Lose control for a second, give a little love bite and suddenly she's got a permanent scar and a taste for raw meat. I'd laugh, I admit it :D.
     
  3. Trulle

    Trulle Second Year DLP Supporter

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    Read it in one go, liked it a lot- just a pity that he always leaves out the interesting parts like the fight with the basilisk.
    Well, anyway, 4/5,
    And hungry for more ;-)
     
  4. Torak

    Torak Death Eater

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    Its been updated.

    I like where this is going so far 4/5 for now waiting for the slight canon rehash is over and the real plot comes in.
     
  5. Memory King

    Memory King Order Member DLP Supporter

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    This story is definitely still going strong. Some pretty good lines here, the idea behind the contract compelling Champions to compete is interesting. Harry's private training from Quidditch Team Members sounds promising as well.
     
  6. Johnny Farrar

    Johnny Farrar High Inquisitor

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    Nice update. Author's description about how Voldemort came to possess the infant body was original and very nicely done. Harry's character development is shown to be both gradual and logical.

    Overall, good update and looking forward to read more.
     
  7. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    I didn't want to comment until I had caught up with everything that had been posted so far. I'm there now and I'm really enjoying this story, despite the quirks in Harry's character or his sometimes head-shaking reactions to things. That's really saying something, as I've never come across a Slytherin!Harry story that I liked, at least that I can remember.

    Harry's personality, his mannerisms or his way of dealing with others - however you define it - is different from canon because that's what he has to do to survive in Slytherin. The House dynamic in Gryffindor allowed canon-Harry to simply continue on with the same set of values or hot-button issues he had when he sat with Ron all the way on the Express.

    With the Hat placing Harry in Slytherin, he has to adjust quickly, because the reckless, heart-on-his-sleeve way he acted in canon, in the friendly environs of Gryffindor, will result in Harry being eaten alive in Slytherin. So he changes, allowing the Slytherin traits to develop, and I think the progression and rationale have been pretty solid so far. Yes, there's his irrational attitude towards innocent Sirius, but he's been conditioned for three years at that point to avoid showing weakness. His distrust of Remus is actually more what I would realistically expect when he has all the info about Remus finally in hand. Again, he's not the reckless and needy Gryffindor here and he never was; that aspect of his personality has been quashed by caustic remarks even from his friends, and he hasn't had the Weasley influence either.

    I hesitate to rate the story yet, but I'd say 4-4.5. I have really only two problems with the story. One pet peeve of mine is when an author (usually a non-Brit) uses "Mom" instead of "Mum". I have no idea if all Brits use "Mum" but everywhere in canon, it's "Mum" and not "Mom".

    The other minor problem I have is a little harder to describe. When the author shows us Harry's internal dialogue, or his thoughts, often that part is less polished or refined than the writing surrounding it. I feel that the author is getting a bit sloppy or lazy when it comes to Harry's inner thoughts or reactions to things. I wish I could give a better example, but I don't have a good one. It just seems that the writing should remain tight when we hear the inner monologue. Does that make any sense?:confused:

    Anyway, I'm really hoping the story maintains the pace and quality, because it's been enjoyable so far.
     
  8. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    Story is nothing remarkable, but her one shot is worth the read.
     
  9. Kensington

    Kensington Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    Updated.

    I really enjoyed the last scene in this chapter. Not only did it have great Harry/Padma dialogue, but it made me wish for a story where Fleur snaps and starts killing her dates for annoying her due to her Veela allure.
     
  10. Johnny Farrar

    Johnny Farrar High Inquisitor

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    I liked the Harry/Padma interaction in the latest update, considering how Padma is characterized in this fic. It's completely different than anything I have read before.
     
  11. psihary

    psihary Groundskeeper

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    Afraid I might be getting repetitive here, but the latest chapter was rather disappointing in it's nature of being a simple retake of cannon and yet again not showing anything different.
    Well, yes it is somewhat entertaining and written good but there is hardly anything more to it than that.

    I honestly can't wait for the moment where the author will take it to AU and start on his own path with plots and conflicts that we haven't read 100 times about and very well know how they will end.
     
  12. scaryisntit

    scaryisntit Death Eater

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    This update was an enjoyable read. I agree that there wasn't much (or any) new content, that we haven't seen before, but, for me, this chapter was simply a nice read, and that's enough for me to want to continue on to the next chapter.
     
  13. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    Despite the lack of original content, every twist on the canon events was amusing and well-done. Although I would'nt mind it being more AU, this story doesn't need to be groundbreaking to be great.
     
  14. DarkAizen

    DarkAizen Professor DLP Supporter

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    It really needs to go into AU. The part about Crouch was useless, the author spent a great part of this chapter trying to unravel the mistery behind Crouch, but we know who he is from cannon. I see it as a waste of time.

    I`m starting to hate this Padma, she isnt your tipical Ravenclaw, she is more of a Lavander clone, and I dont want her as a parining for Harry.
     
  15. scaryisntit

    scaryisntit Death Eater

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    Thank God I wasn't the only who noticed that. I decided against mentioning it... for a reason I've forgotten. No matter.

    Padma at the Yule Ball was unpleasant. Prior to that scene, I didn't mind her; wasn't particularly interested in her character, but didn't mind her. We'll see if that attitude resurfaces again. I hope it doesn't.
     
  16. Stenstyren

    Stenstyren Professor

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    This story started really good. We got to follow everything important that happened in canon from Slytherin!Harry's perspective. It was quick and fun to read. When the author started making more and more chapters she used more and more boring details that i have no interest in reading.

    While the fic is just following canon it will never be really good and i have a feeling we will not see very much AU. Since the author only wanted to do 7 chapters for the whole story in the beginning i don´t think she has planned ay groundbreaking "OHHHH SHIT" twists of canon.

    The last chapter was outright boring and i found myself tabing out of it several times. Lavender!Palma sucked aswell, why would Harry everdate her?
     
  17. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    It makes more sense than "dating" Cho.
     
  18. Sophie

    Sophie Denarii Host

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    fillerfillerfiller
     
  19. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    If I'm not mistaken, the original planning was 7 chapters, one for each year. He probably edited it.
     
  20. Stenstyren

    Stenstyren Professor

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    Yeah, but from the beginning it was supposed to be one chapter per year, then she wanted to write more and did it this way instead.
     
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