It's been a while since I read the PHB, but I think it had something for doing this? Although it tries to direct you more towards having one character per player.

 

There are different ways to play the game. The first one suggested by the book is to create a House with your players. They get to decide where it's established, when, how, etc. Then, they create their own character within the house. They can decide to be the smith or you can spend some point to be the heir or lord of the house or simply a hedge knight who pledge his allegiance to the house. This way you have a common goal. Your house also has statistics, which are affected by your actions through the game. You can invest the coin earned to build a castle upon your house's lands or to engage more troops to guard your border. The glory you earn (type of reward) is also transfer to your house and increase its standing within the realm.

What's also very interesting is warfare. The warfare rules are amazing. I haven't play them yet, but I'm pretty it's going to be awesome. Anyway, if warfare happens upon your lands, you may literally loose all of your lands to your opponent and being destitute.

Other way of playing are as follow:

1. Adventurers : mostly fighting character, you ignore all houses mechanics to focus on the exploration and fighting part of the game. Feels a bit more like a classic D&D game.

2. Free folks: you're playing the free folks, using a simplify house system to represent the tribe or no house system at all. Can allow for more magic use since all that is left of magic (or almost) in Westeros is beyond the wall.

3. Game of Thrones: Every player plays a different house. They send specific character following specific events from the DM. So they can have one doing some trivia in King's Landing while they're army are fighting together against the invasion of the King-Beyond-The-Wall. Allows for more versatility, reflects a lot the book and allows for everyone to experience different play styles. Can be quite complicated to game master since you have to keep track of different quests and plot.

4. Historical: You play during another period. The game initial period is after King's Robert rebellion. You could play during, before, after Ned's death, or during the first invasion of the Targaryen, etc. Allows for more flexibility for the DM, not having to stick completely to the novels or to the characters described by Martin.

5. Night's Watch: No House. Simply character sworn to a same duty. You could use the house system to describe the Night's Watch 'land' too. Like Castle Black and Eastwatch-by-the-Sea.

And that's it. Basically, this game is going to be awesome. I'm going to be playing one soon, I'll let you know how it went.

 

So basically, the small problems that I brought up whilst only knowing the basics have already been solved by the game itself? Awesome.

In regards to the type of game, I would be probably be interested in a game where we're working together as a House, mainly because for options 1,2 and 5, the way I see it you're missing out on most of the fun of the GoT universe and just playing a normal RPG. And well, option 3 probably would be fun, but would get confusing fast.

But yeah, I would love to either be a player for this or to help somebody else run this.

 

House Deelpea : The Answer Is Bacon!

 

Ok, I finished reading the book yesterday night. From a reading perspective alone, I'd say the system is a bit convoluted to understand at first. It might be simply because I'm not used to the terms, but I was looking actively to the example through the text to really understand certain rules.

On the other hand, I think this shit is amazing. It's a nice mix of wargame/strategy and RPG. You have your character which is attached to a house (normal setting, exception may arise if you play Night's Watch i.e.) Every story arc completed by your character earns experience and coins. The group also earns Glory. Glory and coin can be invested in your house, allowing you to increase your domain's population, size or simply to construct a castle or a village. That's for the more RPG part of the game. You play your character through stories, ''level up'' abilities and discovers stuff.

The warfare is another interesting aspect. Since war shapes Westeros, it has its own set of rules. You raise levies based on your House stats, which you can then command to battle. It would be too long to explain how the battle actually takes place, but it balances the Roleplaying part of each character with the aspect of managing an army for the commanders.

What's also interesting is the fact that losing war upon your land may have dangerous consequences for your House. You may lose population/law/infrastructure/influence stats because your enemy has burned your villages and lands. Or you could even find yourself without a House if they decided to seize your lands for their own. SHould you win upon your enemy's land, you could seize their lands. Declaring war should be done with extreme caution.

The intrigue system is also very interesting. Basically it allows you to force someone to accept your deception, think you are their friend or force them to owe you a favor, etc. You decide upon a strategy (i.e. Seduce) and roleplay the exchange (might give you bonus dice to your roll). Roll your intrigue and if you manage to make a better roll than your opponent, you reduce his composure. Should your enemy's composure hit 0, he will stop arguing and you will win the exchange (maybe earning some golden dragons or simply running a dangerous errand).

Anyway, like I said before, I'm running a game in 1 or 2 weeks max with some friends. I'll let you guys know how it goes and depending on how easy the system is to use, I might try to organize one online (through Skype or any other type of chat/video).

 

Game of Thrones / Song of Fire and Ice roleplay? I might be interested. I do not have a strong preference of a platform. Time is negotiable. I live in UTC+2 (+3 in Summer). Hopefully you will announce the game far enough in advance to set up necessary software to participate.

 

I haven't been able to play yet, some conflicting schedule makes it hard to have my player.

The big problem is we either have to do the players BEFORE the actual game or we use pre-fabricated players. Because creating players/house is a long process and requires a lot of discussion. Plus, you can't really determine a scenario before you know which culture your players are going to be. I was planning on going with a tournament at King's Landing, but while discussing with my player about the game, some of them wanted to play Ironborn; which I don't see participating much into it. Others wanted to play the North or even in Dorne, so...pretty hard to setup in one session if we want to create our own character/house.

---------- Post automerged at 13:13 ---------- Previous post was at 10:19 ----------

GAME OF THRONES RPG

If you're interested in doing a GoT session, join the group I've created for it

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/group.php?groupid=152

This way we can exchange contact information and available time to play as well as talk of improving the gaming experience following our first game.

 

I've talked with Mishie today. I realized that I will probably never find regular time for an IRC based game.

Yet, I could offer a variation on forum game in a 4chan quest/community_game form. Either where many play for one character (with variantions), or the players are a council for something that gives orders and reaps the benefits.

A game without a fixed player group with everyone having a chance to pipe in and help/ruin everything.

That would be more of a spam game than a true RPG, yet with plot, and decisions that actually mean shit. Hopefully could turn into a semi-interesting story thing to watch from the side, too.

If there is any sort of interest, of course. Same as before - Sci-fi, Fantasy, Urban Fantasy. Or, even more exact - an insane (many personalities) Vampire trying to survive conspiracies in WoD, a criminal ring trying to wrest control from the world of darknes, an exploration ship in deep space, a steampunk airship pirate band looking for glory, a band of immortal mercenaries in cyberpunk world, a daemon composed of many souls in a fantasy world, an alien hive-mind trying to eat the world, a covenant of mages trying to keep their own illusions of a safe chantry, a tale of the man who kills monsters by absorbing them, a prophet of a pantheon of gods that can posses him for brief moments as he spreads his word.

Something like that. ;D

 

If you're going WoD it's got to be a Malkavian. There's no other choice (plus it'd be awesome).

 

So, in the interest of raising interest, I just thought I'd summarize our first session of the Game of Thrones RPG. Spoiler: I'm the best.

So we start out at Castle Burn, in the Vale, the seat of House Dylpea. Our lands may be no larger than a league, but that league includes the small town of Greenmuth, a port town situated smartly where the coast narrows into the mouth of the Lilywater, the river which leads inwards. Our direct overlord is the Coldwaters.

An ancient house with a tumultuous history, the House Dylpea was founded during the Invasion of the Andals, when we granted lands for service well rendered by the king at the time. Time passed - our station rose, and fell when a paranoid head invested heavily in armies, provoking an imbalance in the local economy. The the reign of the late, penultimate Lord Dylpea, my father by one of Jon Arryn's maids - a scandal in itself - started out in ascent, only to fall as he was compelled by Jon Arryn, who held Mishie as a page of his court, to turn upon his much beloved Targaryan king in treachery in Robert's Rebellion. After the taking of King's Landing and Robert's coronation, Lord Dylpea was left to follow his declining ancestor's example, drinking himself into an early (but much deserved, as he was a cunt) grave.

I'm Arture Stone, the eldest of the House, though my bastardry renders that irrelevant. Mishie is my adorable widdle brother, the new Lord Dylpea, Rhys. Cteatus is the Kennelmaster, Tytos Snow, Master of the Hunt - a bastard holdover from my father's reign when he saved my sloshed father in some ambush. He keeps a shadowcat for some reason - northerners, amirite?

There's also Aekiel, a Willem Royce, squire to my father and courtier of the House Dylpea, but he was off somewhere for the week. Probably pleasuring himself to the thoughts of his uncle's death. He's got a real bug up his arse about Runestone and everyone in it, Seven know why.

As for me? At about 17, I got fed up with hearing my drunk father fellate the Targaryan legacy and ignore me, and left for across the Narrow Sea to fight in the wars. You might not know this about me, but put a small sword and tower shield in my hand and I'm pretty much the best there's ever been at fighting. Sorry for the spoilers. So anyway, I blazed out of there and fought for a while (though not before jacking my father's antique bronze breastplate - Arture was here, Dad's a loser). After a while, I heard my father had finally bought it and came back, to serve as my brother's Master of Arms, because god knows he doesn't know how to handle a lance. I also brought Vyvaen, this hot lady who can sing really well. More on her later.

Anyway we're in the middle of dinner, where I'm drinking Tytos under the fucking table (somehow his cat gets drunk too - how weird is that?), when some punk Coldwater messenger busts in, tells us there's a regional tournament going down at the Eyrie, in honor of Jon Arryn's son's birth.

Naturally, we're fucking pumped - I get up on the table and raise the hype to the ceiling and Tytos's cat gets more drunk, it's the fucking bomb. We get set and leave.

Along the road, we run into the Coldwaters on their way too. Why not roll out with our liege lords, right? Turns out we were fucking suckers. Night falls and they totally spring it that they want my little bro to betrothe their 13 year old daughter. Now, I wouldn't know this, except for the fact that I fucking merced their Master of Arms and won a bottle of Arbor Gold off him, and decided in a manner most brotherly and not Destiny Point-induced at all that now is the perfect time to bust into his tent and share it with him.

I roll in like a baller, and what do I find? My little bro is critfailing half his Intrigue rolls against the Coldwater prostitot, and is seconds away from getting mounted by the tween, who is apparently minmaxed for seduction. BIG BRO TO THE RESCUE! I roll in and shake the bogeys on his six, and then me and Vyvaen bounce back to our tent.

In the middle of the night, the lady wakes up all shivering from nightmares and shit - 'Fire and shadow, ravens overhead' - and I'm like, damn girl, chill. Except apparently Tytos's cat is skulking outside our tent and hears it. As if. That loser just wants to see us get down.

Anyway, we ride the rest of the way to the Eyrie and get set up, and then it's time for my time to shine.

That's right, bitches, it's the fucking Grand Melee.

I roll on the scene decked out in my legit-as-shit bronze breastplate - an antique from the First Gangstas - with my castle forged shield and small sword (because it's how you use it, yanno), and I fucking bounce on these bitch-ass Vale knights like my main man Ser Mychel Phelps. I go 4 rounds without them even dinging me, courtesy of my 25 Combat Defense. I'm critting people left, laying my d6s all up on their chin. Straight up, I almost 5-crit someone and auto-kill them, but foresight and Cautious Attacks keeps me at a cool 4-crit, just a Crippling Wound, because Arture Stone don't kill the buzz, baby.

Anyway, OBVIOUSLY I win without a single point of HP loss, and win 400 dragons for House Dylpea. There were 6 other losers on my team but I totally could have done it solo. Also Tytos wins the shitty archery contest or something too (loser).

Anyway, now it's time for the Joust, and my brother steps up to the plate! He's so cute in his big metal suit. First round comes up, he's up against a hedge knight - and he gets fucking nuked by 30 points of jousting damage. Couched lances OP. We dust him off, ransom back his armor and horse, and roll back to camp. Maybe next year. It's time for the Great Hunt.

Now, the next day, I'm all tense, carrying my piece to the hunt and bringing extra Personal Guard with me, and my brother and that snotstain Tytos all like, 'are you okay, what's wrong Arture?'. Now, I could tell them my lady Vyvaen was all like 'A matter of grave importance will happen for House Dylpea today', but Arture Stone don't pony like that. I tell them I woke up with indigestion and they buy it. We kill two boars and drop them on the cook's Nikes and swag off like pimps. Fuck the annointed.

The Feast comes, and naturally everyone wants to hear about my awesome victory, so I make sure to tell them, like the gracious victor I am, while simultaneously winning a drinking contest and a golden drinking horn. Then, Jon Arryn, Lord Paramount of the Eyrie and Warden of the East and the HAND OF THE KING HIS FUCKING SELF saunters up to my little brother and asks if wants some help finding bitches.

My brother, who ain't no fool, naturally accepts, and turns around to be surrounded by the Coldwaters, who see their marriage proposal falling to pieces with Lord Arryn's 9th Circle casting of Summon Hoes blowing their butterface pedobait out of the water. It almost looks like my brother is gonna cave, and I'm gearing up to jump on the social grenade when Tytos's cat wanders in and almost eats their daughter. The coolest thing Tytos has ever done, and it was actually his cat, go figure. After the dust settles, Tytos runs off to cry in the tents with his cat and little bro LAYS DOWN THE LAW.

Coldwater's are all like 'what about our betrothal offer, you were so receptive', and bro's like 'Listen, imma let you finish, but LORD JON FUCKING ARRYN, THE INCITER OF THE FUCKING REBELLION, MY TRIPLE OVERLORD (Dylpea -> Coldwater -> Royce -> Arryn) just offered to BE MY JOHN, he's the Hand, I don't gotta be explaining SHIT'. Then he threw deuces and walked out. I was so proud I almost puked.

Meanwhile, Tytos is off in the dark, and decides to follow a random guy, because he's a fucking creep like that. Turns out the guy is actually a Coldwater spy and is ratting me out to a Red Woman to the Master of Ravens. Tytos thinks about shooting the raven, remembers he's not his cat and runs back to bro. I see them leaving and follow, but then Tytos's cat gets up on my grill and I come out of hiding and spill.

So, basically, I didn't come home from across the Narrow Sea just to see good old home. This Red Priestess actually has serious beef with me and had been following me for a while. I also mentioned that Vyvaen's dreams came true a lot (Tytos calls it greensight or something) and that we should probably be on the lookout, and that also the Coldwaters could suck a fat one. Me and bro high-fived and it was awesome.

Then, Tytos lames it up again and is all like 'I can brainjack my cat, check this out', passes out and his cat starts getting funky again, and we're both like 'pff, whatever' and Rhys heads back to the feast.

Tytos wakes up again (damn Tytos, HANDLE YO SHIT) and is all like 'But I really am a warg otherkin shadowcat' and I'm like 'DAMN MAN BE COOL ABOUT THE MAGIC'. Tytos needs to stop fucking around.

tl;dr : Hoes on my dick like I'm Azor Ahai. Tytos is a catfucker. Rhys has a while to go. And where the fuck is Willem?

 

Willem was busy making money. Bitches couldn't wait a day for him to get there.

 

I finally managed to get a group of people willing to play pen and paper rpgs together last month. I've been wanting to do so for a year or two, but it only came together recently.

Aight, here's a good story about my freshly minted DnD group.

So, we all don't know our asses from our elbows when it comes to roleplaying. None of us have played before, but dammit, we're gonna figure it out.

Our party, a dragonborn fighter, a tiefling warlock, and me, the half-elf warlock, start out in a dungeon. First thing, a goblin screams at us to leave, and to reinforce his argument, he wakes up a Drake by smashing around against the walls.

Not cool.

I set him on fire while Big Dumb Fighter goes and fights the dragon. We win handily, and then we cut off the dragon's skin, and break off several of its teeth and a femur for use in weapon forging.

So, we finish the dungeon and head back to town. Some bleh happens, and then, when I'm on my way to sell several artifacts we found to a group of amputee graverobbers and fences, I'm accosted by a thief. It's like the dead of night, so I immediately cast hellfire at him, and it one-hit-KOs the guy. I turn over his corpse, and oooops, it was a street urchin who was tall for his age.

So we conclude our business pretty damn fast and leave the city, moving on to the next dungeon. We come back and it's been about a week, and the city is locked the hell down. Turns out the human kingdom is ridiculously superstitious and magic-hating, and they basically blame elves for everything that goes wrong. When the town guard found the corpse of a street waif who had been burned, without any of the surrounding area being harmed by fire, they decide those Dastardly Elves are attacking people to destabilize the kingdom.

And are using pacts with devils to do it. And so they start herding native elves into concentration camps, and declare war against every nearby elven nation or settlement. I started a race war. In the first two sessions.

 

Guess who!? That's right, it's me, Arture motherfucking Stone, back in the heezy, ready to regale you with amazing tales of how everyone but him was tripping over their own dicks in this here second session of Basilisk's Game of Invinceable Fucking Ultrachiefs/Thrones.

So we wake up right where we left off - The Eyrie, Jon Arryn's hood, still rocking the afterglow of blazing a troll-train through the entire tournament.

Rhys, Mishie, my half-brother, my lord, previously cool, decides to wake up on the lame side of the bed this morning and prances up to the Eyrie, choosing Aekiel's Willem Royce to come with him instead of me. Who knew they were allowed to be lords or courtiers in the Vale, am I right?

Gracefully, I allow the insult to slide, deciding to diversify my wardrobe by adding some hard leather armor. Hopefully, my new swag might throw off or delay the red priestess, callsign Crimson Bitch. After that, I saw a maester about how difficult it might be to get a Citadel man who actually knew fucking anything about sorcery or whatever, since apparently there's a fucking major and Valyrian steel link for it in Gulltown Nerd University.

Meanwhile after an hour long Intrigue where my gay brother and his life-partner herald were actually able to talk their way out of a paper bag with Lord Coldwater, the results of Lord Arryn's Summon Bitches spell were heard (after only one night, pretty goddamn impressive). Two extra ball-and-chains offers had surfaced, this time with ladies of actual marriageable age. Elyana Badics of Moonsgrey and Loras Egen of Crown Stag. There was also, of course, the Coldwater gradeschooler, but if my brother chooses her he's also choosing a mercy killing at my hands.

Meanwhile, I got bored of Rhys and Willem sucking face in the Eyrie and decided it was far past time to kill things. Tytos (or Cteatus), who until then had been busy staring lovingly into his shadowcat Visenya's eyes as he imagined what sort of awful babies they would make, perked up at the sound of me leaving the tent and followed me all the way into the forest, peeing on three carriage wheels on the way.

I bemoaned the totally bogus state of Westeros as I calmly defeated a boar by chopping off it's tusks, thinking back to the excellent old days of the Age of Heroes, where the strong were known and free to hold what their swords could keep, as compared to now, where people ran around scraping to lords and whining about one or two little cases of arson. Tytos, or Cteatus, sensing my mood, flattened his ears and sycophantically agreed with every word I said, a common stress behavior of the homo sapiens bitchius.

Growing tired of his moralizing, I decided that the next target would be an entire hill tribe, since this forest clearly didn't hold enough game to satisfy me. Tytos's base nature prevailed, and he quailed in his eco-friendly moccasins. Seeing an easy opportunity to bully Tytos (an opportunity which maesters say is actually biologically impossible to ignore), I readily agreed to leave the hill tribes unravaged for the day - so we could hunt shadowcats instead.

His eyes went wide. Visenya licked her anus in regal distress. My cock thrashed in my breeches at the sight of the pain and misery taking place, in the way only rightful oppression could incite. Finally, faced with death or betrayal of his furry brethren, he reluctantly agreed.

We tracked the shadowcat and found it easily with the help of Visenya - how easily she turned upon her own kind! We (me and Visenya) dispatched it readily enough. Unfortunately, Tytos was too distracted sobbing into his hand-knitted hemp scarf to notice the second shadowcat, who proceeded to maul the shit out of him, giving him two Wounds and me much amusement. Visenya dispatched her competiton for Tytos's perverse satisfaction, and I got two shadowcat pelts to hang on my tent later.

Anywho, we get back and the keg's tapped and the hoes are gone - AKA, it's time to blow this popsicle stand. To avoid traveling in step with the Coldwaters back to Greenmuth and Castle Burn (fuck those lieges), we head east towards Old Anchor to charter a boat around the Fingers. Rhys retreats to his tent to deliberate exactly where he will be dipping his candle's wick, which is totally NOT an excuse for Mishie ditching the session, and we begin to head home.

Of course, this can't possibly end easily, as we are waylaid by the most problem common travelers have in the Mountains of Moon - goddamn fucking hill tribes.

It starts in the middle of one of Tytos's spirit quests. He's off communing with his cat while my girl Vyvaen tends to his wounds (ironclad proof of his not being interested in women, since Vyvaen literally took the Attractive trait), when Vivenya stumbles across an ambush.

Of course, with Tytos brainjacking her, even the usually graceful predator can't manage not to fuck up, and nearly turns into a beastiality-induced pincushion before scampering back to camp to inform us.

Naturally, upon hearing this, I suit up in my +2 Bronze Armor of Swag and march out with 10 personal guards to give them what for. Nobody impedes my fucking path, and I am goddamn spoiling for a fight.

Well, I get it. Arrows pepper my lines (not me, of course, thank you 22 Combat Defense), returned only by Willem, who joins us for some reason - maybe he thought this battle would be his beard, or something. Whatever. Anyway, we're instantly charged by fifteen savage tribesman. I instakill the one dumb enough to attack me, and immediately start looking for better game.

One Destiny point spent later, I find it.

He's two long axes in a mail suit. He's two archers and an outcropping. He's two imperious eyes commanding the battlefield with one GM's will.

He's obviously the encounter boss, and he's fucking mine.

A battlecry leaps past my lips in a callow howl, one unheard since the First Gangstas let fill the air with lifeblood's spray.

"YOLOSWAG!" I bellow, charging through the lines, striking an eldritch fear into the ears of superstitious men. "420 BLAZE IT!"

It's my first real duel of the game and I open up big. 15 damage.

He eats it like it's nothing, and returns with a cool 3 damage - after armor. My blood rises, and with horrifying glee I start raining down blows that would individually kill horses.

Meanwhile, the personal guards are holding their own pretty well, trading evenly, no mean thing with a 1:1.5 numbers disadvantage. Willem, seeing the opportunity to feel like a real man, picks off the two archers besides the chieftan, while Tytos, in his cat (thankfully, not in that way at the moment) utilizes his wondrous power over nature's laws to hide like a bitch.

Back at the main attraction, I'm filled with a terrible mixture of frustration and exultation. On one hand, it feels like some of my better crits are disappearing down rabbit holes, which combined with Reckless Strike is some serious horseshit. On the other, I'm two injuries in and he's managed to avoid getting Manuever-ed off the rock no less than twice. This is exactly the kind of challenge I didn't get when I was stuck in a pen with no less than 28 enemy knights. You can't beat real combat.

Sadly, we draw near to the session endtime and it's time to drop it like it's hot. I wind up and rock him for 28 damage. For those of you at home keeping score, that'll do for any of the following - 3 boars/shadowcats, 2 direwolves, almost two bears, almost any 2 horses, or a mammoth and a fucking half.

He takes a Wound (1 WOUND!!!!). Manly as fuck, but it's for naught. It's an -1d6 (to all tests) anchor around his neck, and two more Wounds later he's no harm to anyone. Tytos finishes schlicking in the woods with his new cat vagina and kill-jacks me, and I'm not even mad about it. A sad end to a strong man.

We search his body and I grab 10 dragons, his castle-forged axes (which are engraved with a castle smith's mark I cannot FOR 2 FREAKING DESTINY POINTS seem to recognize) and his mail (which must be goddamn mithril from the way it was eating up my critbombs). We get back to camp and head home, everyone recovering from their Wounds with Vyvaen's help. Tytos apologizes for killing him and I can't even work up the antipathy to give him a wedgie in my grief.

RIP Doubleaxe Murderchief. You will always be my first.

tl;dr: Party is over, Eyrie's lame. Rhys has 99 problems, and only 3 of them are bitches: the rest are Coldwaters and Willem's cock in his mouth. Basilisk finds me a real enemy and I mourn the loss of a man that no one else understands. I begin to worry about Tytos inviting me to a warg furpile.

 

Bit of revisionist history there, old chap.

 

Lamora, you sounded like Charles Marlow talking about Kurtz there at the end.

 

We have played oWoD last weekend. Game lasted 36 hours we slept like 6 hours total during that.

By the end my eyes was bright red. Like a vampire.

 

While Lamora's story was accurate in all the general details, there were a few things he forgot to mention. First is that we met Ned Fucking Stark and his wife when we went to meet Jon Arryn. They didn't speak much, but he's Ned Fucking Stark. Second is that I completely owned Lord Coldwater with an intrigue that took him out in two rounds (with an assist from Rhys, who would otherwise have been tied to a bed and raped by Coldwater's pedobait daughter).

Next time I get into an intrigue with him I'm going to have to cheer him up a bit. He's currently a bit pissed with us, despite my awesomely stuttered arguments. That'll change once I get a chance to talk to him while he's not surrounded by family. Bitches don't know about my level 4 Persuasion.

Other than that I oneshotted a few bitches with Cteatus' Superior Double-Curved Bow, got mauled by the single tribesman that made it past our guards but then shot the motherfucker in the throat from five feet. Best thing is though, of the 10 guards we took with us to fight these bitches, only one of them survived. He will spread the tale of our oneshotting bitches and the black hole of health that was Murderchief. Also some pansy assed shadowcat.

 

You know what, fuck all of you and your revisions. That pansy ass shadowcat had two kills against those tribesman, and it saved either you or the guardsman's life seeing as if it hadn't taken out that last guy he would have killed at least one of you.

 

Probably woulda got 4 if you hadn't been cortex-fucking it into hiding.

 

And if he'd actually rolled decently during the session.