"X was shocked out of her reverie by Y happening."

As transitions go, that's about as seamless as a baseball.

 

The anime sneeze. You know, the one where a character talks about a character not present, before flashing to the person in question who sneezes?

Besides being a bit dumb, when the character is not named and instead described, I find it insulting to the reader's/viewer's intelligence. It's like the author thinks the reader can't figure out who they were talking about unless they have a shot of said person sneezing.

 

It's just meant to be a joke based on a Japanese superstition that if you sneeze, someone is talking about you. I guess it wouldn't be funny if it's seen enough, though.

 

Like chills down your spine is someone walking over your grave.

 

I don't have a problem with the concept, but I will say it's way overdone. It's kind of become one of those things author's shoehorn in when they want to spice up a conversation and don't have any original ideas.

It's hard to be amused by something the thirtieth time you've seen it.

 

"Harry hates being in the infirmary and escapes it even if he's injured in 15 different ways"

I don't remember if he hated it in canon, but even if he did, fanfiction uses this cliche in the worst possible way. Probably influenced by all those movies where the tough hero awakens in a hospital and immediately disconnects from all the devices that are supposed to help him, to no negative effect.

 

Off the top of my head, the only time Harry asked to leave the Hospital Wing early was to punish McLaggen for putting him there with his stupidity.

 

My biggest pet peeve ever: the fact that most smart!Harry stories are written by dumb authors.

In fact, they seem to be inversely proportional – the smarter Harry is supposed to be, the dumber the author actually is.

 

To be honest, you can usually spot a "genius" written by… a "not that smart" author - amateur, professional, and even screenwriters - a mile away.

Every time I see one of those, I am reminded of the series The Following, where the main villain should have been superintelligent, but the only way the screenwriters were able to write him was by everyone else holding the idiot balls size of a small car.

Edit: It's especially jarring in Evil Dumbledore stories, because "a genius" is one thing, but "an evil genius with 120 years of experience" is so out of the league of nearly everyone, it's not even funny.

As I said many posts earlier: "You're not smart enough to write Evil!Dumbledore"

 

No matter what House he is sorted into, how much his backstory is changed, or how AU the world is... Harry Potter always befriends Hermione Granger.

Harry sorted into another house? He'll befriend her in class, the library or a study group.

Harry is a loner? He makes an exception for Hermione.

Harry goes to a different school? Come fourth year he comes to Hogwarts for the tournament and guess who the first person he makes friends with is?

Harry was born three years earlier than canon? He'll mentor and look out for her.

Harry raised by purebloods bigots or Voldemort himself? He immediately befriends her, just don't expect a reason why.

An AU where muggles and muggleborns are heavily oppressed and/or are in concentration camps? Don't worry, the Malfoys or another family have no issues taking her in and raising her themselves, so she goes to Hogwarts and becomes friends with Harry.

All roads lead to Hermione Granger, and I hate it.

 

Reading a random HP/Avengers crossover, which is fairly ok, when suddenly

 

I think I've read that one-- if it is the one I'm thinking of. In another fic the author was fanboying out over how brilliant Hermione is left and right (despite the fact that super genius Harry was inventing magitech that was super OP) and a few readers including me called him out on it so in the sequel Harry finally admitted that Hermione wasn't the most brilliant person who'd ever lived. I chuckled.

 

I love the "seriously" added on at the end, like the author was so terrified of it being taken as ironic that they had to make absolutely certain everyone knew that the title was, of course, no laughing matter.

 

Hermione might be a bit full of herself at times, but she certainly doesn't have the ego to say that about herself.

That said, tacking "seriously" onto the end make me think it's sarcastic lol.

 

Reading a bit further (before I dropped it)… No, I don't think it is.

 

This is the same girl who in canon constantly frets that she's on the verge of flunking out of school. Which is delusional, yes, but the point being that other people say that about her and she will, at most, fish for such compliments rather than making them herself.

 

When fem!Harry is called Lily, or Harry's twin is called Jim. What kind of bankrupt imagination do those authors have? do they really see the Potters as people who would give their own names (or diminutives thereof) to their children?

When characters get in long battles and had been cursed several times with broken bones and cuts in their abdomen and all that shit, yet they still manage to run around and fight and beat everyone just because. It's like the authors don't even understand that injuries have consequences beyond staying in bed for a few days.

When stories are based entirely on one character leading Harry around, fixing him or "showing him the truth". Not interested in reading about characters without agency or ideas of their own.

 

It's happened before.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louis_XVI

 

I'm well aware of that, it happened within the books as well, just saying that it doesn't fit the Potters, and seems to lack imagination in any case.

 

I was mostly just joking about how common it is irl. I think the fans started writing fics that way because of the dreaded epilogue.