I don't think you know what a Mary Sue is.

I said nothing about her character in my setup; I merely provided an example of how one can improve conflict in a story by raising the stakes. Plot circumstances alone don't make a character a Mary Sue. Bad writing does.

 

Thats a lot along the lines what I had in mind. I figured they would put memory charms on the child and the new muggle parents to prevent them from realizing its not actually their child. Also if the child had some very very weak magic obviously they would have to do something to make sure there is no accidental magic once the child is living in the muggle world. I think squibs would probably be somewhat rarer than muggleborns, so it would actually not be that common for a wizarding parent to have to give up their child. Muggleborn children would be much more common and memory charms would also be used on the child and the muggle parents to adopt the child to a wizarding family.

If a child turns out to be a squib or of extremely weak magical power, the wizarding parents wouldn't always be memory modified if they are against it. Some would choose to get it done just so they don't need to deal with the loss of a child probably but not all. Obviously James and Lily would not have wanted that, so they've just figured they would tell Harry when he is old enough to understand, but the time has just never seemed to be right. This would alone would probably make Harry pretty pissed at first.

Anyway I am now trying to figure out more of exactly how would Tom, Harry and possibly some other people Tom has lined up go about getting rid of Dumbledore and Grindewald. It's not exactly going to be straight forward, because they have pretty wide support so there would have to be some sort of campaign to discredit them or they would have to be removed before the public has any idea what is going on.

Anyway thanks to everybody who has offered constructive ideas etc. so far.

 

I actually had an idea that's born from PoDK that's kinda maybe a little similar to that, but from a different angle.

When their little girl was gravely injured in a car accident, the Dr. Grangers were shocked to find out that their daughter had completely different bloodtype from either of them, and what's more when they did a DNA test they found out that she was unrelated to her at all.

They started digging and hiring a private investigator (who was either a squib or a muggleborn wizard himself), and eventually found that the girl was, in fact, a cast-out squib who had been swapped with their daughter, who was a muggleborn witch. This policy, much like the YWRA in PoDK, was spearheaded by Minister of Magic Tom Riddle, 'rescuing' (or kidnapping, depending on your PoV) muggle-born witches and wizards and began integrating them into Wizarding society at the earliest age.

The girl the Grangers raised was a squib that, instead of an orphange was placed with the family instead, perhaps because during the early days of the policy the details were not so refined.

The ending could be that Oblivators breaking down the Grangers' door as they realized the truth; then after a scene change showed that the Grangers were happily married, but childless (the Squib girl oblivated from their mind).

 

For those of you who are curious and have the time http://anti-shurtugal.andontie.net/?p=82 is an interesting article someone wrote up about the case of what makes a Mary Sue that I found last night.

That sounds like it could be an amazing oneshot.

@ Gila

The idea of a squib sister seems interesting, but I'm loathe to advocate adding in a family member just to start it rolling. You could always up the age a bit say 8 or 9, when he sees his best friend being taken away. Harry's parents would disapprove of the idea, but make sure that he does not speak about what he saw for fear of punishment/ being obliviated by the government.

There are plenty of canon characters that seem rather weak (I can think of three Slytherins right off the top of my head that could easily fit - but it would be rather weird for Harry to be friends with Marcus Flint.) Obliviating those that are weak when it comes to using magic because they can't fit the perfect world created would add some more tension and fear as well. I suppose you could have Grindelwald be into eugenics and breeding a better stronger wizarding future. Eugenics was something that was popular around WWII.

Besides, if these weaker 'magicals' are exiled from the community and banned from ever receiving a wand, they would be squiblike at most with a few quirks of magic. For the most part, everyone needs a wand to perform magic.

 

I agree that bad writing is the source to Mary-Sue. Maybe the term is not appropriately use. But the fact remained that using the Squib sister for your plot is asking for troubles: you've got a squib who's an original character and can evade Hit-wizard (guys who can do magic you know) and squads of Nazi exterminator (which probably use guns) because only her can bring change to the wizarding world (seriously?).

Summary: In a world controlled by Grindelwald and Dumbledore, Harry Potter must find his long lost squib sister who has the power to change the wizarding world as he knows it.

---

While I was writing that I was thinking that the plot idea could actually work with another character. Replace the long lost squib sister with Tom Marvolo Riddle. Prodigy, Head Boy and later on a respectable member of the higher society, he fled from Britain after being crippled in an assassination attempt from Dumbledore and Grindelwald because he was posing a menace to their governing power.

Harry discovers he has a squib sister cast out of the family by the ministry of magic. He seeks to find her, but his research doesn't deliver what he was hoping for. He finds out that she was never given to a muggle family but brought to a muggle 'factory' where she was killed by wizard of the government. Angered, Harry tries to find a way to bring down Grindelwald and Dumbledore. While looking for information he finds out the name Tom Riddle and realize that this person could be the key to defeating the two Lords. He had a vast network of allies in purebloods, was loved by the public since he was favorite for the post of Minister of Magic or some other post and he simply is a prodigy with magic. Harry decides to find this Tom Riddle.

---

The assassin attempted to immolate Tom Riddle to pass it off as a bad experiment with magic that went wrong. Or the Dark Arts. He cast Fiendyfire on his house, but Riddle managed to escape but not without being badly burn on his face. Newspapers claim that he was experimenting with the Dark Arts and got killed in the process. Riddle let some of his acquaintances that he is still alive and will take his revenge at the most opportune time and that, for the moment, he will leave the country to be out of the Lords' radar.

 

These ideas are giving me more ideas. For one catalyst I started thinking maybe Neville. In canon his relatives at first thought he was a squib. They would almost take him away before it is found out that he does have magic, albeit perhaps he's not at strong as many wizards. He would however as per canon be good at herbalism and also because they don't have Snape as a teacher good at potions as well. Neville could admit he was almost taken away to Harry after a while (it would probably be pretty embarrasing to him) and Harry would start to wonder how could they make such a mistake with somebody who does have talent just more so in potions than in traditional casting.

Also I was thinking about Dumbledore and Grindewald. Dumbledore would probably be "good" in terms of having good intentions just the way he goes about getting his ideal society is just not really quite so good. Grindewald on the other hand would be more like dark lord material except he has had to tone down his tendencies to appeal to Dumbledore whom he believes to ultimately be the stronger wizard. So Dumbledore would think that these squib children are being send away to live happily with muggle families and they would be, at first. Grindewald has more extreme views he is hiding and since there is no followup system as nobody is supposed to know exactly were these children live, he could occasionally go and arrange some "accidents" to remove these disgraces. Harry's sister could be amongst these unfortunate. There could be some more behind the scenes action that Dumbledore would be oblivious to as he believes his country to be perfect. Also there would probably be some serious like society shattering conflict if/when Dumbledore were to ever find out.

 

You also have to address the issue of: when do they send off the squib. If they do at 11 years old, then everyone will know. It will be commonly accept and no secret that squib have their memory erased and live with muggles. Otherwise there is just too much chance for a fuck up and Grindelwald and Dumbledore are both geniuses so I do not see them doing something stupid like that.

If they make it a birth because they have a way of detecting the magic on the baby, then they can erase even the evidence from the parents.

 

Sounds a lot like 1984!Harry, where Tom Riddle might be O'Brien.

 

Perhaps children who are just plan squibs and have not one ounce of magic can be taken away at birth. They probably would have deviced some way to tell muggles apart from wizards after all Hogwarts has that magical quill that writes down the names of all magical children born at birth. The details of squibs in canon seem to be a bit hazy in this regard, but I don't really see squibs attending magical schools as they could not parttake in many of the subjects and they would probably benefit more from muggle schooling if they wanted to see employment in the muggle world.

Grindewald and Dumbledore want to also remove children who are magically so weak they probably can't live a meaningfull life inside the magical society, so that would probably have to be done a bit later as they haven't found a way to meaningfully measure a baby's magical strength. As for the exact moment when this would happen, I'm still trying to figure it out, but it would certainly have to be considerable earlier than at 11.

 

Portus: It could play out somewhat similar. Though I would imagine Tom being something of a high flier, simply due to his skill with magic and his willingness to do what it takes (that is if you stick closer to his canon character). I can imagine the Ministry in this idea liking having a psychopath in their 'kidnap the muggleborn, abandon the squibs' department.

 

What about a Massive AU where the Statute of Secrecy was never made. The wizarding world basically follows the "magic makes you superior" principle. Wizards rule the earth and muggles are second class citizens or slaves, and squibs are treated just a little better. Harry, whose mother was a muggle, and his father a squib, grows up in a crappy environment until he becomes 11. Having superior magical ability, Harry gets shipped to Hogwarts, and stripped away from his family, which is the norm for any muggleborn, or child with squib parents. Deciding that the wizarding world is abusive and horrible. Harry decides to become a revolutionary and topple the government. After winning the revolution, Harry decides that wizards should never be allowed to commune with muggles ever again. With a variation of the fidelius charm, Harry invokes an ancient magic that separates the wizarding world from the muggle forever, creating the Statute of Secrecy.

 

Well you got it on your 4th word: "Massive". That fic would be ridiculously long and the chances are that, even if you actually finished it, you would have lost half or more of your readership along the way simply because the fic is so long.

Other than that...it sounds like it would one of those moralistic stories which give the author a chance to impose their own moral values on any given situation and wax lyrical about them...

 

Don't you mean your OC that you named Harry to get readers is shipped to Hogwarts?

 

@Tenages: Any good fanfic has an OC named Harry, because canon!Harry doesn't have any worthwhile personality traits.

 

And this is where you are wrong, my friend. The best fanfics take Harry's canon personality (loyalty to his friends, courage even in the face of almost certain death and a noble streak a mile long) and turn them on their head. For example, in my own fic, I made certain that Harry started out wanting the best night possible for everyone including himself, and then as the night stretched on, he became more selfish. More importantly, I made it so that in every situation he wanted to do the right thing, but due to circumstance, he ended up looking like an asshole despite his best efforts.

Another example: Joe's Harry in Wastelands is the same Harry who has lost all fear for his own life having lived and died so many times, and is brave because he has nothing left to do. OoC, yes, but based on the same canon personality.

But there is definitely a way to make Harry interesting without betraying his canon personality.

 

It may be too long since I've read the original series, but from what I remember his "loyalty", "courage in the face of death", and his "noble streak" are all interchangeable with criminal stupidity.

End of 1st year: Going after a fully-trained wizard at eleven isn't courage, it's insanity. He should have died. Deus ex machina (love protection) + Quirrel's stupidity (going after him physically) saved him.

End of 2nd year: Taking Lockhart with him when he knew he was useless was stupid. If he knew where the chamber was, he could have gotten any other teacher. He should have died. Deus ex machina (Fawkes) + Riddle's stupidity (not cursing him immediately) saved him.

End of 4th year: Not much he could have done, but since when are portkeys automatically two-way? He should have died. Deus ex machina (Priori incantatem) + Crouches and Riddle's stupidity saved (Portkey, arrogance) him.

End of 5th year: He and his friends got extremely lucky in the DoM. Authorial fiat saved him and his friends.

/tangent

My point is that Harry's behavior isn't distinguishable from somebody who is just very stupid. For his courage, he does all this stupid shit that he should die from, but doesn't. For his loyalty, he forgives Ron for ditching him (several times) and goes after Sirius into an obvious trap. For his noble streak... what noble streak?

 

:facepalm

/filler

 

No. Go read the damn books again.

 

So I might have stretched that a bit, but most fics worth reading have a Harry who is vastly different from his canon counterpart.

CR, WoT, Denarian, HP & BWL, On The Way To Greatness, VINCET, Forging the Sword...

The only really excellent fic that I can think of that keeps canon Harry and stays true to him given the circumstances is HP & the Assassin's Creed.

 

^

Canon Harry may not be awesome like the ones in those fics, but it doesn't mean that he doesn't have any worthwhile personality traits, notice the emphasis.