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Politest ways to say "Fuck You"

Discussion in 'The Humor Mill' started by Arthellion, Dec 2, 2019.

: 0/5, 0 votes

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Goten Askil Groundskeeper

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Dec 2, 2019 #21

"Your opinion has been noted."

But I think the best polite "Fuck you" is to simply smile, nod and ignore what's been said. And if they insist on repeating themselves, well: "I heard you the first time."

"It's not for him we're doing this. It's for one of our own." Julius Wilkes

Nazgoose
Microwave Professor

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Dec 2, 2019 #22

kiss them

ScottPress said:

You are all being the vegetable equivalent of televangelists
Click to expand...

Utsane
Archinist Hαn Sαlsæd First

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Dec 2, 2019 #23

say “my pet rock is smarter than you”

Faith.

I don't know when you gave it up, lost child. Were you never loved when you were young? Did a woman spurn you, or did the system beat you down? What hardships drove you, controlled you, until you came before me today?

It's hard to keep faith when I see children like you, broken and despoiled, then tossed aside when their purpose is finished. Oh yes, my boy, you're hardly the first ringleader I've seen down here, and you might yet not be the last. You’re full of fire and fury, just like all the ones before, but you and I both know that it’s a hollow feeling. There’s a faith-sized hole in your heart, and no amount of Warp-spawn will fill it.

You don’t have faith in the Imperium. You don’t have faith in your fellow man. You can’t even believe in love, or hope, or joy and despair that doesn’t come from an alien abomination. You can’t see the ocean of corruption, yet you’re drowning in it. You’re lost in the wilderness, little child, and only you and the Emperor can know how deep you’ve sunk.

Other lost children have asked me why I stay. Minister of a sad little church, shepard of a tiny flock, drowning in the greed and corruption from above - I’m just one man. I stand here fighting a battle already lost, with the hive in flames, the Governor and his cronies dead, and the black ships standing watch above. Perhaps there is no point to this mad universe; mayhaps it truly is a galaxy spinning adrift from rhyme or reason.

Yet the Emperor, for all his power, was just one man. Horus the Betrayer, Saint Sebastian Thor, and even humble Ollanius Pius were all just men. You are one man, as am I. Each of us may be saints or sinners, as we make of the lives given us.

I look at you, strong in Warp-borne mutations and diseases, and all I can see is weakness. You were so frail that when hardship bore down on you, and when this harsh reality sunk its claws in, you bargained your immortal soul away for relief from a little pain. Your physical strength cannot hide your spiritual weakness: where better men stood fast and died proudly, you sold out your Emperor and your fellow man for your worthless life.

So come fight me, lost children. We’ve all made our choices, and now those choices have made us. I shall bring you into His light with cleansing flame and prayers, and redeem us all in death. Come one or come all, you shall not put a foot into this hallowed ground while I still draw breath.

For I have faith, and that is enough.
Majube Order Member DLP Supporter

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Dec 3, 2019 #24

"Oh, honey..."

Unknown, oakgem217, Utsane, Nazgoose
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Dec 3, 2019 #25

Johnnyseattle said: ↑

"Noted."
Click to expand...

In the same context, "Duly noted." the duly really clinches it here, but its pretty rude.

And have you noticed that only Europe seems to a problem with Deatheaters? Maybe it’s because Americans have spent the last 200 years shooting deer, playing GTA: Vice City, and keeping an eye out for black helicopters over their compounds. Meanwhile, Brits have been cutting their steaks with spoons. Remember: gun-control means that Voldemort wins. God made wizards and God made muggles, but Samuel Colt made them equal.
Rehio Bad Dragon ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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Dec 3, 2019 #26

The fun one at work is "That's nice."

oakgem217
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Dec 3, 2019 #27

"I'll take that under advisement."
Shouldabeenadog Death Eater ⭐

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Dec 3, 2019 #28

"I will do so shortly after the heat death of the universe."

"If you so desire."

“Would you prefer Santa Claus? You’re on his naughty list by the way. It would complicate the mission if he devoured your soul.”
~Water Mage, From the Brightest Constellation

Unknown
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Dec 3, 2019 #29

I've had to send a lot of emails to end users without swearing and have learned some nice substitutes:

"Regardless..."

"As mentioned on previous occasions..."

"While that might be the case..."

"Based on what we can see..."

________________________________________

Before the Death Eaters. Before Voldemort. Before Tom Riddle. Before Grindewald. Before Harry Potter. There was Albus.

Albus
Johnnyseattle Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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Dec 4, 2019 #30

I'm also fond of "you've been a big help" when dealing with difficult people at work.

How to add that extra spark to your romantic scenes:

Don E. Delivery said:

Neither noticed Neville Longbottom watching them and masturbating furiously.
Click to expand...

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