Replace 'cunt' with 'Ear' and a great many of the more perverse in this forum would probably flock to the story.

Edification On the 'Action hero' law requested.

Untill it comes though lets rephrase it into

'There shall never be a toy action-figure of harry sold. It shall never be mentioned unless Harry is being teased'

Edit:
Addendum: or unless Harry gets to cause a great deal of property damage when he finds out.

Edit2 :

Second addendum:
This applies to masks, calenders , collondors, waffle irons, ect et all

illegally Polyjuiced hookers are excluded from this rule.

 

Possible Law 1.

Ronald Weasley shall NEVER get a pilots license nor will he go near and airplane. if he does he is to go too close get sucked into the engine and die promptly.

Possible Law 2
Keep it simple bitches make a plot line detailing you plots and sub-plots on a sheet of paper and don't loose track of it. If you find your sub-plots becoming more important then you main plot take a step back, take a deep breath and remember law XXXI.

 

Where did the first one come from dokorma?

Potter Law ?

If the words "golden" and "patronus" are ever placed next to each other (short of there is no...) the author must be immediately destroyed. Painfully.

 

Possible Law:

Harry Potter is a boy. It doesn't matter how AU it is, Harry was born a boy and will alway be a boy. Girl-Who-Lived stories are always sad excuses for Harriett Sues.

 

Don't forget the Bond Girls! LOTS of gorgeous, smart, athletic, and DEADLY Bond Girls! (Jinx is one of my favorites.) Just 'cause I'm bored with Harry/Harem stories, that doesn't mean I don't want some easy sex in there.

 

Unless Golden Patronus is just a euphemism for a Golden Shower or similar act... in which case the author should probably still be immediately destroyed.

 

I read a one-shot That creeped me out can't remember the title as I read it while still in Amsterdam.

 

Unless it is an AU to which Harry travels to fuck said Girl who lived. Which will not be called Harry.

 

amendment to amendment

She shall not be called Lily either.

 

Is this the pet peeve thread or the Potter Law thread? I'm getting confused.

 

I thought We were proposing new potter laws and amendments to current ones.

 

We are, but Potter Law =/= Peeves.

Potter Law is much more general. Things like:

It's speaking of Harry Potter fanfiction in general, not specific situations.

The above law is a good example I think. The idea that it is law that Harry Potter is a boy can be applied to all fics. The law saying that if he were a girl, he shouldn't be called Lily is far more specific.

 

so stuff like this is allowed

while stuff like

this isn't. Thank you for clarifying that m'lord

 

It's not so much a case of "allowed", since this is a just-for-fun thread, as the idea of the thing.

But yeah.

 

POTTER LAW - #???

This is FANFICTION. If we are unable to do things just because canon said it can't happen, then the point of fanfiction is null and void. Everything is possible. (Besides Male!Preg)

 

proposed law
Have fun while writing if your not having fun its almost always craptastic. So if you have fun writing yaoi or about Harry getting sucked into LOTR and fucking every elf male and female, do so just don't post it here.
Edit) yes I realize that this post begging for a flame but its generally true

 

To any of the members with under say... 150 posts, I'd thank you to kindly take a glance at THIS thread. A great many of the propositions from the newer members have been made and/or discussed already, and to head off the more obvious repeats I ask that you have at least a passing Idea of what was in the old one.

 

I think when i sat down and last read that at 17 pages it took me 3 days. That was about a year ago me thinks.

 

I do not remember any specific mentioning of God and Hell. There is a shitload of religious symbols and concepts (eg Harry is Jesus) in HP, but I do not remember any characters actually referring to or mentioning God or Hell. Perhaps you can tell me exactly when and where this appears?

Even if pureblooded wizards do mention God and Hell in canon, it is still lazy writing, only the fault rests on the author instead of fanfic writers. I mean seriously, for all that Arthur loves muggles, he can't even pronounce 'electricity' right. If pureblood wizards can't even grasp the basics of muggle culture (which is what canon leads us to believe (eg Arthur spending his entire life studying and being infatuated with muggles, and still cannot understand muggle 'basics')), there is no reason why they should should mention or make references to muggle theology and beliefs about deities or the afterlife, which is undoubtedly immensely more complex than how to pronounce 'electricity' and what the function of a rubber duck is. Little inconsistencies like this bother me. We don't know what wizards believe in. It is never mentioned in canon (to my knowledge). Obviously they believe in the afterlife (due to the existence of ghosts and 'souls'), but I highly doubt wizards believe in deities and such things as God, Heaven and Hell. Perhaps they believe in some form of karma, but I highly doubt wizards theological beliefs are so much inline with muggle beliefs to the point of mentioning God, Heaven and Hell. And remember, when I say 'wizard' I mean purebloods. Not muggleborns, halfbloods, or any wizards or witches with muggle ancestors.

It's one of those little things that turns me off fics (everyone has little pet peeves like this). I get seriously annoyed when someone like Ron (who is very ignorant of muggles in canon) uses these expressions multiple times (which is often the case).

 

I always thought their beliefs were along the line of life comes form magic, life returns to magic.